And now I pass the time away inside this internet cafe
My flatmates won’t be back for hours, outside it’s raining wint’ry showers...
Ah crap. I hate it when that happens. Then again, it’s worse (for others) when you leave the key on the door (on the inside) so they can’t get in... and you’re sleeping. Happened to me years ago.
That’s funny. In American, “twat” and “flat” don’t rhyme.
Ah yes, “twot”, I’ve heard that in the movies.
I cannot even call my friends to find out if they’re at loose ends -
I also left my phone inside. When I found out I nearly cried
I left my keys in Mr Rumps car a few weeks ago. I was starting work at ten thirty and he was in work from seven thirty.
I didn’t notice until I tried to leave the house at ten and couldn’t. I had to call him to come thirty miles back to the house and let me out. Woops.
unfortunately I read that as ‘I left my keys in Mr Rumps a few weeks ago.’
“I left my keys in Mr’s rump a few weeks ago”
Still, this internet cafe’s only £1/hour. And they’re playing er whatever it was that Summertime by Will Smith sampled.
Kool and the Gang, baby.
Free verse from the Ledge there. Shame really—this thread was like an ILX Rupert the Bear strip up till then.
Shit I spoiled the flowing rhyme, I’ll try to take more care next time.
I got lazy.
The silver lining in this cloud: the web cafe costs but a pound
And on the radio I hear a melody from yesteryear!
I also passed some time away inside my local library
And read some of Promethea by comics guru Alan Moore
Did you sing along in that cafe
When you heard the song? (or is that gay?)
I did not raise my voice for fear, perhaps, that other folk would think me queer
The twat/flat rhyming scheme gives it that essential Mike Skinner feel.
why did you have to come here, and post a stupid thing like that
cos yeah it felt like this thread is through though but you could have ruined it you’re such a twat
Oh ken c you’re a funny man, although your verse it does not scan
I had to leave the web café, and come back to the libraré
they shut their doors at 4.30, which is exceedingly early
You know what’s superfun is when you get locked out of your dorm room at 1:30 in the morning, or when you forget your wallet/ID/keys at home 80 miles south and don’t get ’em back for 5 days
I’d only ever read the word twat & had no idea of its pronunciation. When I said it, it came out rhymed with flat, and chuckles and ribbing ensued. That was 6 years ago and some people still make fun of me for it. Glad it’s acceptable somewhere.
i must say i did not know that
you ‘mericans even said “twat”
it strikes me as a british word
like “bollocks”, “arse” or maybe “turd”.
Yeah, it’s used rarely.
Showgirls to thread........
i’m not sure i would have fed you dinner if i’d read this before seeing you tonight.
and i think ‘twat’ and ‘flat’ rhyme perfectly in american, at least the way i talk.
Wait, but twat and flat rhyme in british because you say “flot” right? We all pronounce twat the same no?
n.b. Merriam Webster SITTING ON THE FENCE there. Trying to please everyone, pleasing NO-ONE.
the title of this thread has a really sing-songy quality to it. i can imagine chanting it over and over at some sporting event:
Oh woe is me, I’m such a twat. I locked my key inside my flat!
Oh woe is me, I’m such a twat. I locked my key inside my flat!
Sung to the tune of “Look at me, I’m Sandra Dee”.