so fucking good

I HATE IT

I LOVE YOU

I HATE THAT I NEED TO KNOW

WHAT YOU DO

thats really cool. parody thread. so funny. so funny.

this is a thread about x

thizz?

no dude.. this thread about x. its really funny. good job.

chaki gave it the once over twice

no no im serious. im actually giving you a standing ovation as a type this.

I MISS OLD ILX TOO CHALKI BUT FIGHTING WON’T BRING IT BACK ;_;

is this old ilx or am i thizzin so hard?

chaki that’s impossible.

im not fighting it. in fact, i love it. i dont think they should change a thing. also i think you should start this exact same thread on nu-ile because it is so DAMN GOOD.

2 much thizz—this thread is not actually that great.

Dear chaki,

Shut the fuck up chaki.

Dear Alex.

Thank you for the music alex.

did you guys know there is a I LOVE MUSIC board? its pretty cool.

i’ve heard of it but i don’t know how to get there. i’m still trying to figure out how to download porn!

damn chaki, chill out son.

dear chaki-

i dont know whats up with u on this thred, but i’m glad we’re friends on last.fm. u r my only friend on there. ive got a feeling its because i have mystic defender on there, but that’s ok.

your friend,

grady

dear allyzay-

i like you a lot too. i feel like if we weren’t five hours apart (six in the summer) we would end up on a lot more of the same threads. jhoshea- same goes for you. i don’t get half the nfl in-jokes but its cool. if u guys want me to send you post cards you should click over to 1p3 and i’d be happy to.

-grady

ps- i am drinking at work again.

hi grady,

i think you seem pretty cool too! if it makes you feel better, we don’t get our own in-jokes 89% of the time.

hearts,

allyzay

dear allyzay-

that does make me feel better!

-grady

hi ally and grady,

i love you too, g. ally im calm, bro!

good vibes all around, everyone.

i know, i was teasing.

dear grady-

anyone who drinks at work is all right by me.

blood diamonds!

-alex

dear alex-

i only do it because my boss makes me! here is a picture of our fridge:

i can send you a postcard toO, if you want.

-grady

ps- this blood diamonds bisuness is lost on me.

pps- #$%$@#@BOXCAR LOLZ##%$^^&*

dearest grady,

JESUS PLEASE CAN I WORK WITH YOU

sincerely,

ally

dear allyzay-

we are currently looking to fill an office manager position. the old office manager is moving back to the mainland. she’s the sprite-drinker so it’d free up some room in the fridge, if you know what i mean ;-P.

love,

grady

dear grady,

well, i can definitely do that job, and trust me, your sprite problems will disappear with me around. i’ll send my resume over, but does the job pay for relocation?

xo,

ally

dear ally,

you are srsly not allowed to move to hawaii to drink beer all day and leave the rest of us in this shithole.

yrs etc,

-alex

;_;

dear allyzay-

i don’t think it does. i’ll have to ask my boss’s boss. he’s on another island.

full disclosure: here is a picture of the fridge door:

would tombot need to find a job out here too?

yours,

grady

grady,

he can fend for himself. he is an adult. but, if there is no relocation, i don’t think i can do it ;_;

cheers,

ally

dear alex-

we dont start drinking beer till at least 2pm.

hope that clears things up.

signed,

grady

allyzay-

its ok. i dont think i could handle having a co-worker who knew how much time i wasted on ILX.

if u and tombot ever come visit i will show you two a good time.

best,

grady

Dear Grady,

Now that’s what I call a mustard bottle.

Regards,

pp

Mr. Plains-

We dont have ikea or target over here, but one thing we do have is costco.

yours,

grady

wait—no target?!

dear allyzay-

it is true that we are without a target. i have heard rumours that one is coming soon, but i have been relegated to wal-mart and costco for the time being. you have to rough it in paradise.

best,

grady

Dear Grady,

What’s in the pink Aloha can?

Regards,

Mr. Plains

Mr. Plains-

you can purchase some here.

its filled with corn syrup and artifical flavors and such, but refreshing and a local favorite nonetheless. infact, its available at costco for about 1/2 the price of that auction.

best,

grady

dear everyone,

good thread guys, i like it a lot. have a fantastic night, i’m gonna go fake sleep now! c u tomorrows!

hugz & other myspace bullshit,

ally

grady shops at the safe-a-way!

dear kingfish-

actually my co-workers shop there. i usually shop at the foodland or the down to earth. but we tried out safeway yesterday. it reminded us of the mainland.

dear ally-

sweetest of dreams.

dear all-

if you enjoy my correspondence skills, e-mail me your address and i’ll send you a genuine hawaii postcard.

yours,

grady

dear grady—

i’d like to add my voice to the chorus of admirers of your work fridge—srsly that shit is sterling.

also target is possibly the most overrated place on earth. there’s one not 4 blocks from me and i never go there. why? why would i go there—they don’t even have 20-packs of toothbrushes.

so don’t sweat the lack of targets.

xo

joe

dear joe-

thanks for the good word. but i wasn’t really missing the place that much.

do you know who plays the song in their newest commercial? that’s really been bugging me.

fondly,

grady

chaki OTM

dear grady,

i think there’s one w/a b52’s song in it—not sure if that’s what yr thinking of.

yours truly,

joe

dear grady,

i would like a postcard, and have sent you my address! plz to send me yrs and i will send you a card with like cats on it.

thanks,

ally

yo jon

wanna start up a mad lame telnet bbs, 1997 style???

hearts,

ally

^ maybe!, might be cool if it scraped to web too

Also, terminal windows look like my actual work

yeah dude, it is way easier to use terminal windows instead of the www, i mean no one at my work even knows wtf a terminal window is, so they’re just gonna assume i’m doing something insanely complicated and leave it be. bad thing = no imgs??? ;_;

I was thinking a url scraping page

oh yeah you did say that huh

duh sorry

talk.ilxor.new-answers

telnet sucks on laggy wifi or celly though

Dear Everyone-

i am drinking at work again.

Dear Ally-

I mailed u a postcard today.

best,

grady

I’m drinking a Caffeine-free Diet Coke that I found in my work fridge. It tastes surprisingly much like club soda!