I really mean this, sincerely—I would love to see Britney Spears get her shit together.
wtf even happened to her, she like went completely mental about 3 years ago and never looked back
MOD: PLEASE REPLACE STATIC SIRENS WITH
YES THANK YOU
If this were a real emergency, lights would be flashing.
I know! I picked the wrong ones on GIS! I’ve requested a change on the moderator board! Fuck!!
Guys let’s focus on the real issue here!!
neverforget.jpg ASAP plz
Where have her kids been for the past two months?
Given that she’s insane, is there any chance K-Fed gets custody?
so shocking ****Zzzzzzzzzzz***
Whoa, I didn’t know I was a mod on ILE as well! At least here.
Anyway, sirens fixed.
Looking forward to her next single “Detoxic”.
How many hundreds of Iraqi children have gone to rehab without a peep from you people?
plz to photoshop crying eagle into Britney crotchshot
THANKS NED, NOW BACK TO THE BREATHLESS SPECULATION AND CONCERN
Thanks Ned :D
Who knows where her kids have been, I had been assuming they were with K-Fed actually! Otherwise chances are, it is too late, they have already become FERAL CHILDREN.
Shakey Mo OTM for once.
HAHAHAHA Feral Children!
Post by Ignored User (Shakey+Mo+Collier) removed.
I still can assume exactly what you said, and I’d just like to invite you to go read EVERY OTHER THREAD ON ILX INSTEAD you tool!!
Also: FERAL CHILDREN!!!! :D
I like to imagine that Ned actually reached inside the screen and set the sirens to spinning with a gentle nudge.
FERAL CHILDREN
i get it!
Thanks but you’re off subject, Nick. CHILDREN. FERAL. LIKE THAT UP THERE.
Whoa, I didn’t know I was a mod on ILE as well!
ILX codebase has embedded Ragget auto-mod functionality.
Guys let’s focus on the real issue here!!
Not sure whether to roffle @ “focus” or “real issue”.
Either one!!
TS manboobs vs. wolfboobs
The real issue being of course ABANDONED PACKS OF STRAY CHILDREN TAKING OVER OUR CITIES.
guys where u been she’s got like 10 nannies
If Britney actually named her kids Romulus and Remus I would probably shit.
shhh you xpost
Where the wolf titties at?
I’m going with “focus”. ILX + focus = teehee
wait is britney the wolf in that painting, or is that Kevvy?
Britney Checks Into Rehab- Out a Day Later
Posted Feb 16th 2007 3:27PM by TMZ Staff
Filed under: Britney Spears
TMZ has learned that while Britney Spears checked-in to rehab, she refused to stay and checked out — less than twenty-four hours later!
LIES
So let me get this straight: they tried to make her go to rehab, but she said “No, No, No”?
Yeah maybe if they had made BEYONCE go to rehab more like.
As “EXTRA” first reported, the pop star entered a rehab facility two days ago. Now TMZ has learned that the center was located outside of the country, and she refused to stay.
TMZ is told that Britney checked in at the urging of friends and family, after being seen intoxicated in public places and was so “exhausted” on New Year’s Eve she collapsed.
intoxicated + basically naked + courtney love style make-up = awesome britney
GUYS IT WAS THE CIA BRITNEY JUST RESISTED EXTRAORDINARY RENDITION SHE IS AN AMERICAN HERO
STEVE SHASTA OF THE WOLVES?!?!?
xpost: lol
guys where u been she’s got like 10 nannies
Now I’m picturing these nannies protruding The Brood-style from Britney’s abdomen.
The persona of Buckethead, a composer and guitarist, was supposedly raised by chickens.
LOL I WAS GOING TO POST STEVE SHASTA OF THE WOLVES TOO, WE ARE WAY TOO IN EACH OTHER’S MINDS
Pls to photoshop Romulus & Remus underneath Britney_giving_birth_doggystyle_sculpture.jpg
FRIDAYENDOFWEEKBOREDOMMINDMELD
Her children will become feral wakeboaders!!1
Semi-professional wolfboarder
^^^ I like this “feral child” the best
also Britney is basically an American Hero.
Like Rudyard Kipling’s Mowgli (Baker even refers to him as a man-cub), Shasta grows up naked in the wild and is able to speak to animals, including the wise old brown bear Gomposh, although this “speech” seems to consist as much of body language as of actual vocalization. Along the way his animal parents and friends rescue him from attacks by a grizzly bear and a moose, and he takes revenge on an eagle for killing wolf cubs.
Shasta also discovers a human tribe and is briefly captured by them before his wolf parents help him to escape. His curiosity eventually draws him back, and this time he is treated more kindly and persuaded to stay. The chief explains to the tribe that he is in fact one of their own tribesmen, Shasta, grandson of the old chief. Shasta’s mother was killed by a tribesman who defected to an enemy tribe, the Assiniboines, taking Shasta and abandoning him in the hope that the wolves would kill him. Instead, he survived and eventually returned to the tribe bringing his “wolf medicine”.
While Shasta is in the process of learning tribal ways, he discovers that the Assiniboines are once more planning to attack. During the raid Shasta is captured and prepared for sacrifice, but is once again rescued by his wolf-friends, who avenge his human mother’s death by killing many of the enemy tribe.
After the battle Shasta stays with his wolf kindred, and the author is deliberately ambiguous as to whether he later returns to human society.
GOMPOSH VS. ASSBONES
Ned I didn’t read a single piece of that quoted thing and would just like to say that “GOMPOSH VS ASSBONES” is one of the funniest single posts I’ve ever read. I don’t want to know the context.
Thank you, one tries.
NOT SO MUCH FUN FACT: Buckethead routinely sets up chickenwire in the studio.
Why Final Fantasy sux:
This is Gau. He lives amongst the fauna on a fictional savannah. Apparently the fauna taught him how to dress like a complete fucking tool.
let’s stay focused on britney
teehee
I like the implication that Britney’s children are going to grow up to be Buckethead.
vs.
Ok seriously did you expect otherwise?
Complete text of Shasta novel. Chapter titles include “THE COMING OF SHOOMOO,” “SHASTA COMES VERY NEAR BEING EATEN BY A BEAR” and “SHASTA’S RESTLESSNESS AND WHAT CAME OF IT.”
BACK TO FERAL BRIT KIDS
as a result of Shasta’s restlessness, there are dinosaurs
“SHASTA COMES VERY NEAR BEING EATEN BY A BEAR”
lolololol
“HOW SHASTA FOUGHT MUSHA-WUNK”
Oh, do tell!
This is Gau. He lives amongst the fauna on a fictional savannah. Apparently the fauna taught him how to dress like a complete fucking tool.
American Apparel ad copy!
cambodian jungle girl sounds hott
For a second I thought that would be a band link.
Okay I swear I have seen Britney wearing Gau’s clothes.
http://www.funtrivia.com/quizdetails.cfm?id=68107
I HOPE TO GOD YOU ALL GET THE OLSEN TWINS BANNER AD
OMG I DID
Reload it if you don’t.
RAISED BY WOLFS
http://www.feralchildren.com/en/index.php
Hot Today
Favourite Children
I like the implication that Britney’s children are going to grow up to be Buckethead.
I read that as “I like the implication that Britney’s children are going to be raised by Buckethead.”
One day Buckethead pulled Britney’s ferral children aside and showed them a picture of her unclad crotch. “This was your mother,” he said.
aww, it didn’t like my html.
Britney, a life in pictures
stage three:
stage four:
stage five:
fin:
I like how they blew that cameltoe up to giant size, like it wasn’t already hugely noticeable.
This thread makes me realise how much I love you all.
“This was your mother”
“and this was her birth canal”
HEY GUYS, YOU KNOW THAT HUGE CAMELTOE IN THE BRIT PICTURE? I MADE IT BIGGER!
britneycameltoeattackstokyo.jpg
DEAR GOD, IT’S LIKE THE WHOLE CAMEL.
FERAL CHILDREN RAISED BY CAMELTOES
camelcankle
\||/
\{}/
\[]/
Wow, ASCII Kegels!
OK, the first is the most unmistakable. I am so proud of my accomplishment.
jesus this thread
\][/
I don’t even want to know what caused that.
wow, they all seem pretty freaky !
Not again! (xpost)
“i love that racist no-brains drug-hoover doesn’t visibly have breakdown”
i love the way that paris herself still seems so UNLIKELY to go crazy
I would say she can cover it up pretty well. She’s admitted (in her diaries) to boulemia and drug use.
“i love that racist no-brains drug-hoover doesn’t visibly have breakdown”
:D
I’m curious why you love that, too.
do you seriously want to have this discussion AGAIN? i am about to go into a meeting, i am busy busy, so i can’t. isn’t BALDNEY more worthy of our discussion?
you’ve never put up an argument though! her brilliance is so great it dazzles all non-racist thought or whatever.
Try there...
I meant try asking there!
can’t be bothered.
Well there you go then.
Britney’s just in the Lost Highway phase of life.
I’d pay to see a Norbit-like movie about a love affair between wigged Britney and bald Britney.
“She’s admitted (in her diaries) to boulemia”
too much sourdough?
no, too filling. she prefer emptiness.
‘Zactly.
I love Paris’ relationship with celebrity ‘cuz it’s so fucking casual — therefore sane, uncreepy. Compared with the likes of Britney, who seems as though she’s being traumatized by fame, Paris is pretty damn cool about it. She’s in control.
Being superficial has distinct advantages, esp. re: floating vs. sinking.
jesus.
Being superficial shit has distinct advantages, esp. re: floating vs. sinking.
fixed.
if you think getting famous via a sex tape is uncreepy, then well done, otm.
what about jesus, enrique? being famous for changing water into wine. now THAT’s creepy. ;-) or was that some other dude?
that’s not creepy, that’s awesome.
Wait, i thought Jesus’ earlier miracle was the loaves & fishes thing.
Not just awesome—that’s way cool.
wasn’t water to wine part of the loaves and fishes thing?
How Paris got famous is creepy, how she deals with it isn’t. I loathe Paris but I have to say, no other celebrity out there handles (or seems to handle) the constant invasion of privacy so easily.
Sex tape, beaten up by boyfriend, hacked T-mobile, falling out with best friend, racist comments, flashing her coochie, being pelted by trash—for Paris, there really is no such thing as bad publicity.
well, here’s a list, altho this wiki has a better design. Water into wine only shows up in the book of John, but the mass feeding and healing events in the other books happen later on.
xpost—and that’s not creepy?
xpost—I really don’t know. I skipped over most of the bible stories.
Haha probably creepy isn’t the right word. This reminds me a bit of something from a Discworld book, which went something like “if sticking screws up your nose was madness, then numbering them and keeping them in careful compartments was sanity, which was the opposite— Ah. No. It wasn’t, was it...”
Paris isn’t crazy, she’s just TOO sane.
Ignoring the xposts suddenly makes this thread awesome.
haha you mean BALDNEY wasn’t already awesome enough?
the intimate video upthread where she speaks frustratingly and symbolically to her friend about what seems like celebrity induced problems and the fact that it was sold by possibly same friend and he seems completely not aware or ignoring her meaning and at times just prepping her for a scandalous “yes, i party” admittal =very poignant. did that make any sense? well, i feel sorry for her a bit..
wow. maybe she’s going to start making hardcore music or something? has bought a large collection of wigs?
— Ms Misery (missmisery7...), Today 2:38 PM. (MsMisery) (later)
court said on 18 Feb 2007 at 12:14 am
shes insane! i love it! im sad abotu what shes ingesting, and the bad man who got her started on that shit.
but shes made herself a true outsider under the influence or not- wch in itself is not a crime, shes expressed whatshes feeling insdie on the outside an dyes its the result of a pysc hotic break due to uh…ingestion of a very very very evil substance. and i know what i know because i know, the people who know- she cred for a long tome before she did it and hewr bodygiards were allthat was with her
how the ultmate insider the persopn whose almnost directly resposnble for ruining guitar rock ended up shaving herhead is an ultmate ironyt and the fact that she shaved her head hell if i didi it noonbe would blnk butt hats cos ive aleways been an ousider even when im an insider- but ths is breaking news due to that fact that this was the lolita fuck up fantasy doll jonbenet nghtmare- i remember the firt time i saw a little thing on her in spin i seriously very seriously thought iutw as a parody like an snl skit and when it became real i worried and it affected everyone, in my world in teh world of rock n roll and this may as well be death in some ways- she wasnts ober when she did it—i wish she had been because then id be able to really kind of get behind it and just say- fuck yeah express yourself- do it= ypu dont feel pretty on ths inside anymore show it man, but it s happened and itslegendary, this is going to be legendary.
is she going to join mercury rev? start hanging at spac eland?
i doubts he even udrstands that world but nod ecent punk at heart can begrudge the once totally self an dmommy sexualised “virgin” for shavin g her dammed head, i love it and im sad for her att he sAme time.
im sure shes clueless to how brilliant this was, how in some ways anarchic an dfemnist it was- but she still needs to go back to rehab.
thjats myt two cents.
Use one spellcheck, Courtney — you’re assaulting my eyes.
i think she would improve mercury rev substantially at this point
i’m sure shes clueless to how brilliant this was vs. being clueless about underestimating others and overestimating yourself.
i’m clueless to why i’m involved in this tho.
Real Lock of Britney Spears’ Hair! Already in UK!!
BRITNEY SPEARS HAIR FOUND ON MY TOAST! CD, TOO!
Proceeds donated to Minnesota Valley Humane Society!
Britney Spears Hair is back with Wooly Willy Toy!!
Put Britney’s Hair Back On With The Magnet Wand!
BRITNEY SPANIEL’S HAIR!
BRITNEY SPEARS HAIR BRUSH
WAS LAST BRUSH TO COMB HER HAIR
100% GENUINE lock of Britney Spears Hair
The reason there is no reserve is it will sell its self
court said on 18 Feb 2007 at 12:14 am...THE MOST AWESOMEST THING EVER TYPED ON THE INTERNET
hahaha, when i clicked on hstencil’s link, the lowermybills.com ad was the one where your mouse turns into an electric razor and you shave the dudes head.
Paris Hilton is the best-looking and the most toxic, which is why she’s the most awesome. I mean, cmon— if you can’t handle the hoovering, the dancing and the drinking, then maybe you shouldn’t be involved in a VIP-room celebrity lifestyle? Feeling bad for Spears or Lohan is fucking absurd, imo. The only one who I worry about is Nicole Richie, and that is only because she looks like she needs to be liberated from the secret Nazi camp in sunny Barbados.
Paris Hilton is the best-looking
?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
She IS! I mean, her box over the Spears’ box or the Lohan box any day.
Two words: wonky eye.
battle of the scissorin’ firecrotches
When I take time out from my studies, artistic pursuits and charitable work to contemplate celebrity gossip I feel bad for Lindsey Lohan because I liked nu-Parent Trap and Mean Girls and I’ve felt kinda bad for Britney ever since that creepy Lolita Rolling Stone cover that came out when I was in middle school. Paris Hilton’s steely resolve in the face of wealth and fame aside she is really vile and I have already used up my reserve of irrational appreciation for a seemingly v. nasty famous person on Kimora Lee Simmons
I think when I regard someone by their looks, I’m not usually thinking of the state of their labia. Maybe that’s just me, though.
It’s a guy thing.
(not really)
(ok, maybe sometimes...)
the hair is in very good condition , still alive.
OH NOES BRITNEY TRIBBLE
(;__;)
ANY HAIR FOR SALE ON E-BAY IS A SCAM, PURE AND SIMPLE
(so says the ‘authentic’ buyritneyshair website anyway...
My brother-in-law sold real hair on eBay, it’s wasn’t Britney’s though.
oh you know people are shaving their fucking cats to try to get in on this shit
“Genuine Britney Pussy Hair!”
hahahaha cheers
“buybritneyshair.com: Expires 18-feb-2009”
( http://www.dnsstuff.com/tools/whois.ch?ip=buybritneyshair.com )
They have two years’ worth?
Britney checks- uh, out of rehab.
Y’all keeping up?
She’s going to end up like Anna Nicole.
Britney thought there was lice in her extensions (!)
Also, is that really a cigarette that she’s smoking in that photo?
guys i’m in love with meth britney
k-fed stretched the shit outta her onion.
“She’s going to end up like Anna Nicole.”
or Michael Jackson.
Stimulant drug abuse (particularly amphetamine and cocaine) can lead to delusional parasitosis as part of a stimulant psychosis. For example, excessive cocaine use can lead to an effect nicknamed “cocaine bugs”..
Have there been any meth-fueled pop epics yet?
she should stay in rehab at least long enough to watch all three Back to the Future movies
checked out of rehab again
the level of scrutiny that the entertainment industry is focusing on these people is really getting under my skin. it seems like they aren’t going to be satisfied until she has a teary press conference where she admits to being a smack whore ala Tara Connor, or she dies.
OK I CAN’T KEEP TRACK OF HER REHABBING ANYMORE
We’re told Spears showed up at Federline’s house last night and he wouldn’t let her in.
!!!!!!!!
8[
K-Fed is harsh
WHAT KIND OF BIZARRO WORLD ARE WE LIVING IN WHERE K-FED FEELS HE’S TOO GOOD FOR BRITNEY SPEARS??!?!?!?!??
SUN RISES IN WEST TOMORROW, ROOSTERS TO CROW AT DUSK, FILM AT 11.
well, in fairness, K-Fed isn’t a meth addict in a bad wig.
(ps britney if u readin this don’t take that personal, i love meth addicts in bad wigs and u can stay with me any day of the week)
so get him a wig.
listen i am not buying shit for kevin federline.
i’ll bet that’s how brits got hooked, buying shit for k-fed then taking a taste for herself. such a slippery slope.
i think you’re on to something.
not enough ppl carin about britney in this bitch ;_;
yeah, and the nu-ILX thread is just me trying to learn how to post images on nu-code.
Badass:
She needs to guest star in a few episodes of The Wire before the hair grows out.
er, this link may last longer:
http://x17online.com/celebrities/britney_spears/x17_xclusive_britney_rages.php
those are great!
for the first time I feel britney could totally kick my ass.
i want to hang out with her and let her veg in my house but I kind of feel like we wouldn’t like the same tv shows and she would mess up my netflix queue.
the paparazzi are fucking evil though. i already hate running into people that I see at work.
i applaud the shaved head hoodie lacrosse shorts and nikes look
i like how earlier in the day shes wearing the wig then later when she shows up to destroy kfeds car with her umbrella she goes w/the all business.
omfg that rules
i’ll bet that’s how brits got hooked, buying shit for k-fed then taking a taste for herself. such a slippery slope.
She was on coke in 2002, which was before both marriages.
or I should say, as early as 2002
BRINTEY FOR PRESIDETN
Has anyone photoshopped a bull into that picture of her attacking the car with a brolly?
from nu-ilx thred:
