my friend kyle sent me a picture of a bug he captured in his kitchen, i think it’s brilliant

ahhhhh i’m scared of it

i like that bug a lot and i normally eschew all bugs.

EB brought me an ad for “loungers,” she said it made her think of me. wtf?

(for those of you who don’t know, a lounger is basically a polyester muumuu, but i’ve just dubbed it a “summer slanket.”)

estela why are you chewing all bugs

htfo max you big ratbag jk

my parents have a cat called ratbag

Oh, estela <3

idkwtptsiph: jergins, i like your most recent display name.

smoove is telling me about “ratbag,” saying “it was evidently born to some tomcat’s bitch.”

ratbag is a good name for a cat from taranaki.

what does htfo mean?!

help the fuck out

hey

genuine aw

was laughing so hard at her in that bag

the fucking neighbors are doing thursday night sing-song again and some terrible singer girl is doing that one indigo girls song, and when i say terrible i mean TERRIBLE.

fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck i can even hear her from indoors. now she’s singing some goddamn simon and garfunkle bullshit.

those people make me hate everything.

omg that is horrible. tell them to take it to a karaoke bar jeeeeze

i think it’s stopped. thank fuck.

those people are such assholes. i’d rather have breakfast with 10 loud chewers than have breakfast with them.

they’re all “ooh we have nice people over and do sing-alongs and use cloth shopping bags and we belong to the neighborhood committee” and yet they never never never even acknowledge their actual neighbors.

except, that is, the day the man came snooping around to see what i was painting (though he didn’t even care once he found out), and then it came out that he thought i’d just moved in. 12 years, dickhead. i’ve lived here 12 fucking years you self-involved prisspot.

and since then he’s gone right back to ignoring me.

(lol at me, they piss me off so much i get all up in arms every time i think about them.)

take a deep breath and do your best not to bludgeon your neighbor to death with his own “welcome friends” door plaque.

I don’t have any hard feelings toward the type of neighbors who have very little interaction with you because they’re intensely private/shy. but these people sound like the smuggest, most self-congratulatory bastahds on earth, so I feel for you.

lxy, i can come over and set some booby traps if you want. they’ll never know who it was!

yes, ur, that’s exactly what they are. well stated.

t, if they got booby trapped one of their song-singing friends would probably organize some motherfucking goddamn candle-in-the-window/flag-at-half-mast/potluck-at-the-turnaround kind of bullshit, so best leave them to their healthy tediousness, i think.

but thank you for your support!

i was leaving for my evening promenade and saw some ladies walk by with balloons and thought, hey, that’s nice! and then when i went outside they had left them by my front door!

i use cloth shopping bags :(

i think i know about this type of people though

i want to evangelize about reusable bags but i won’t

i love them. my two good sturdy fit-lots bags, they’re both from Providence

yeah i walk to the grocery store, i don’t know how i did it without them before. they fit so much and you can put them on your shoulders and no more cabinets full of plastic bags i will never reuse.

nothing in the world wrong with cloth bags, i’m all for them, use them all the time. despite those self-righteous fuckers across the street giving them a bad name.

now that they’ve ruined the indigo girls for me

i bet sunday they’ll crank up and laugh like hyenas at wait wait don’t tell me

yeah i walk to the grocery store, i don’t know how i did it without them before. they fit so much and you can put them on your shoulders and no more cabinets full of plastic bags i will never reuse.

this x1000!

i also like wait wait don’t tell me but i listen to it quietly on my ipod?

:(

those neighbors are too busy strumming folk tunes on their mandolins to listen to radio programs.

“neighbors.”

i don’t use cloth bags

you should, i was skeptical at first but it really improved my life

frankly i can’t imagine t.sila grocery shopping to begin with

they do sell gin at safeway in CA

wait really?

why was this fact not mentioned when i was looking for places to live?

you can buy hard liquor just about anywhere around here

i thought they only did that in sad places like michigan

they sell “gin” at grocery stores in ohio but it’s like 20% abv

you should, i was skeptical at first but it really improved my life

i get paper bags, the kind with the handles. i use them for garbage bags

frankly i can’t imagine t.sila grocery shopping to begin with

the internet makes me lol sometimes. i am a very informed shopper, dating back to my high school supermarket gig.

they do sell gin at safeway in CA

safeway in cali is called Vons iirc. it is a shitty store and i never go there. i buy my gin @ trader joe’s—18.99 for 750ml of tanq/bombay sapphire. my wife started drinking gin again so i go thru 1 1/2 bottles per week

Dang, I just bought 750 of tanq for 22.95 :(

at least you don’t have to share yours with ms. silaviver.

i am very generous with my booze fyi

ILX Sandbox

23 registered users 3,213 threads 130,498 messages (figures updated daily)

<3 xp

i miss californias policy of selling booze everywhere

it does spoil one

i am an informed shopper too

*high five*

i do 100% of the grocery shopping in my family. my kids always misbehave in supermarkets though, i don’t see what the excitement factor is for them but they try my patience (which is admittedly pretty poor)

on the other hand, i hate shopping in drug stores and my wife loves them (stereotypical girlie thing?)

how old are your kids, revivalis.t?

i was SO bad in the grocery store when i was a kid. my brother was worse though. also we always made my mom buy us a donut.

we were never allowed to go inside, we had to wait in the car.

sometimes my brother would refuse to go inside so he waited in the car and my mom would say “you’re gonna get stolen. good.”

one time my brother released the hand brake and we were rolling down a hilly street towards another car all screaming with excitement but then a man we knew was going by and he saw what was happening so he opened the door and put on the brake.

sounds like something jergins would do

hahaha i wish there was a young girls’ novel about estela and her brother’s childhood hijinks that would later be made into a cute summer movie.

my kiddies are preschoolers, hence their disinclination to listen to me

i like the sound of these tiny little silavivers running amok.

i used to teach 3 and 4 year olds. the idea that they will listen to what an adult says, let alone DO what an adult says, is pretty lollable

i’m sure they’ll become very good listeners once they become school-aged

actually when i worked w the lil ones for schooltime at the arts center, i found the 3–6 year olds were super well behaved. older than that you start having to restrain yourself from wanting to shake the little smug, satisfied grins off their faces.

when my nephew was three and in my charge he stole a packet of tic tacs and hid them in the tiny pocket of his tiny shorts, they fitted exactly, but i caught him because he rattled when we ran and when i said, wherever did those come from, he said, the fat boy at the shop gave them to me, and then our friend who was visiting from london turned glum and said, i was the fat boy at my parents’ shop.

haha

i’ve never hated a person as much as i hated this little boy Yuya Mizukami (need to put him on the call a random person a cockfarmer thread. in 20 years he might find it). Age 3, biggest little shit i’ve ever met. he and i, we had a private english lesson, and it was a battle of the wills

just one lesson?

no, 24. once a week

that is a lot of lessons.

23 too many in this case.

the littlest cockfarmer

!!!

t. silaviver do you like cooking also? what about ironing?

wdyll mopping

are you a house-husband

do you know where i can get a house-husband

i am asking because i am on a campaign to stop people ironing. if enough people refuse to iron maybe they will stop producing clothes that require ironing because is there anything more useless and backward and frustrating than ironing

i’m not sure i follow your reasoning. will your house-husband wage this campaign for you? or will he do your ironing while you wage the campaign yourself? what will you do with him once you’ve put sunbeam out of business?

i kind of like ironing.

oh i meant xp

i don’t really have a campaign i just hate ironing

i hate ironing and don’t do it, unless i’m going to a wedding or job interview

i am sort of a house husband at the moment

cooking i’m sort of neutral on—when i feel relaxed and have lots of free time i enjoy it, but as a daily chore i hate it

we should reopen my “ask me a question thread” at this point

i am a neat freak and my wife takes full advantage of that

i like cooking very much

i am ok at cleaning though i can make a lot of clutter. i have a lot of cluttery interests. but being in a cluttery place makes me go kind of crazy so i don’t let it get too bad. also cleaning some stuff is really cathartic! like bathtubs!

harbl when are you coming to visit?

i sense a trap

oh no, nothing like that! i just want to make sure everything’s spic n’ span for you. truly!

(does anyone have a large jar — say about 5’9.75“ tall — and some plastic sheeting i can borrow?)

the harbl jar

someday maybe i will visit for just long enough to get my height marked in the doorframe

i was just thinking about that.

maybe jergins has got some plums you can use as bait for the harbl jar.

we should plan a sandbox fap. in baltimore lol

lazy out loud

uhh

maybe jergins has got some plums you can use as bait for the harbl jar.

― estela, Sunday, July 5, 2009 5:58 PM

i think maybe there’s a joke i’m not getting, but this just sounds plain dirty!

it sounds terrible.

we should plan a sandbox fap. in baltimore lol

did we not do this? i see how important i am.

i wanted to say:

• i love cooking

• i hate ironing and it weirds me out when boys iron more than me (which is also like, job interviews lol)

• something else i forgot

i remembered:*

• as my age advances, i have become increasingly concerned about tidiness in my home space. the reason i remembered this was bc my friend is visiting and i think it is grace training or something because i am constantly being tested to keep cool in the face of domestic disasters such as: spadgetty sauce all over my stove (ay!!!!) and like,is it that hard to wipe up the water you splash all over the bathroom sink that i cleaned before your arrival?

• harbl, i also find bathtub cleaning cathartic! in fact, even in my younger, messier days, bathtubs and toilets were the things i always insisted remained clean (a good thing, i think).

• not having a tv but still being unemployed makes me miss being able to watch the martha show at 11am every morning.

*this remembrance brought on by washing dishes at 3:30 bc i couldn’t rightly go to sleep knowing my kitchen was a mess.

it was a miniature sandbox fap, just a test run