Well, we can either write our exams or use this cagey software called “SofTest” that does not work on a Mac platform, which of course is the kind of laptop I have. It’s also notoriously unreliable and every student I know has had to ditch the computer and use a blue book for at least one exam in his or her law school career.

xpost—good grief! I wonder why?

I hate writing by hand, my hand always gets really tense and painful.

xp—it’s so they can take it to a handwriting analyst and see into your soul.

I think out of some misguided notion that it would give the admissions staff a more personal sense of us, or something. it just seems very impractical and like a lot of deserving students with unreadable handwriting might not get full consideration. i have very good handwriting, though.

I forgot to tell you guys that this morning I spied a young hipster listening to Richard Marx on his ipod.

IRONICALLY i’m sure.

Richard Marx is a

REPEAT OFFENDER

His hair accounts for about 8% of his total height there.

Sez the tall guy in the back.

I laughed at the hipster. You can’t sit there and listen to “Hold on to the Night” without me laughing a little bit. Sorry, kiddo.

HOLD ON TO THE MAAAAAAAAAAMMARIES

if only that were an option.

1. we waited that long because we showed up at 6:50 for the signing and there were 1 million people there. And she did a reading for those who arrived early, so that ate up a long time.

2. Devon does not smell like seafood. Good seafood restaurants never do. Courtney and I discussed how it would make a great TT place, but we were concerned that we might have a poor turnout because some people might think it was too pricey. Drinks are about normal. No $6 buckets of PBR, but not over the top either. The apps make it all worthwhile.

3. Snow. That’s ok with me I guess. I don’t care.

4. Amy S. signed my Strangers w/ Candy DVD.

ihttp://ec3.images-amazon.com/images/P/B000HC2OBO.01._SS500_SCLZZZZZZZ_V39796032_.jpg

She wrote on her ass “I’m thinkin bout pussy” (because she’s lusting after the girls in the background, you know) and scratched out “thumbs” from “two thumbs up” and wrote “dicks.”

The hispanic guy in front of us in line said “I wanted you to sign my ass,” to which she replied, “No, I need a flat surface and everybody knows you Mexicans have those big asses. Sorry, it’s late and I’m punchy. And racist.”

Richard Marx was one of the 80’s most tortured troubadours, though this is not always apparent from the highly produced pop sound that send him to the top of the charts. Just beneath this facade is a man prone to despair and existential angst, expressed blankly in his guileless poetry. Consider the 1987 hit, “Don’t Mean Nothin’”:

Cause it dont mean nothin
The words that they say
Dont mean nothin
These games that people play
No, it dont mean nothin
No victim, no crime
It dont mean nothin
Till you sign it on the dotted line

Here in a single chorus he expresses not only a feeling of personal emptiness, but spits bile in the face of the very record companies that sustained him. The song also suggests a national emptiness brought on by the heartless greed of the Reagan years.

oops

Truly, Richard Marx deserves to be our National Poet Laureate.

i don’t want to go back to work because i hate my job so much

and work makes me want to be dead

there was some beef between him and chicagoist or gapersblock a month or so back. i guess the guy still lives in the area and makes tons of $$$ as a song doctor.

WELCOME TO MY WORLD JESSE.

or jenny, whichever.

i guess the guy still lives in the area and makes tons of $$$ as a song doctor.

Yup, he’s written a bunch of pop-country songs, actually.

Some theatre professor at my college who retired before I had the pleasure of taking a class from him was apparently good friends with Richard Marx — as in RM was the guy he called when he was visiting Chicago and looking for a place to stay.

“Hazard” is pretty good.

His wiki entry lists an assload of people he’s worked with. He’s been busier than you’d guess.

later chicago.

Would I like Richard Marx?

I think I’m going to do some serious booze restocking after work. I’m talking beer, prosecco, irish cream, that starbucks liquor business, vodka...

Would I like Richard Marx?

LOLZ

prosecco

Isn’t that just a fancy word for ham?

All those Jesse posts were Jesse.

I just shoplifted again. I didn’t even set out to. They made it too easy. I went to one register, and they said, “Closed. Go to the register over there.” Well, over there was a long-ass way away, and in between was an exit. So I just left. Like they watch for that shit. Please. Saved myself a good $20.

I got a horrifying phone call this afternoon from ComEd (the electric company). They said they’re going to turn my electricity off on the 6th unless I pay them $180 right now. I know for a stone-cold fact that I do not owe ComEd $180. So this afternoon I called them. Seems that my electric account is all paid up and totally on time, which was almost as much a surprise to me as anything else. It’s Jessa’s account that’s horribly overdue, and subject to be turned off, and somehow that’s still in my name. I explained that this is my ex, and acted extra surprised, and begged them to please not turn her electricity off, that I would talk to her. They gave her an extra month and took the account out of my name. Nice.

I don’t know why I LOLed at “so I just left.” But it is making me laugh still.

“prosecco”

Isn’t that just a fancy word for ham?

Are you joking? (In case you’re not—Italian sparkling wine = prosecco; prosciutto = ham.)

Courtney sent me this and asked me to diseminate it. I don’t quite get it.

Oh. Wait. Star Trek.

In case you’re not—Italian sparkling wine = prosecco; prosciutto = ham

I was joking.

Holy crap is it snowing.

Greetings, People of the Great Lake! It is late at night, and I haven’t gone to sleep yet and this thread came to the top of New Answers and I clicked on it and it seems to already be approaching browser-busting length and I don’t have time to read all of it, and i can’t figure any of it out but it seems there are a lot of pictures of a kind of cute woman named Saywhat? who is most often photographed eating potato salad or something like that, but I just wanted to tell you that I really enjoyed meeting those of you who came to NYC for CMJ- jaymc, nick and sarah (nabisco was already here and doesn’t seem to post to these threads anyway) and i guess i see ailsa posted as well so i don’t feel so bad bumrushing your thread and i’ll stop now k-thx stop.

haha You’re fluttery! Like snow!

That was an awesomely messy post. Welcome very much.

I seem to vaguely recollect an It’s Snowing thread from late at night two years ago where the only ILX0rs still awake were you, me, jaymc and teeny.

Hello!

The bus was SO crazy this morning. It was the most packed I’ve ever seen it. An old czech lady was smushed between a bookbag and the door. A huge jerkoff refused to move out of the way for people and kept saying, “I’m from east LA! You best not mess with me! Stop shoving! I’m for real!” Every time we stopped, I had to jump back off the bus and into a pile of slush to let people out. It was all very dramatic.

Anyway, now I’m at my desk listening to Wilco.

By the way, I did decide on ORCHIDS for my December topic, so please feel free to email me recommendations, including but not limited to: any songs by bands with the word Orchid in their name or songs with the word Orchid in the title, books you’d recommend, personal stories involving orchids, movies about orchids, places to see orchids...

i had to wait 40 minutes for a bus today. it’s extra freaking awful out there today. plus i get to go back to the place i’m staying and shovel the sidewalks, which sucks because the house is on a corner lot.

Bands: The Orchids

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Orchids

I’m 15 minutes late to work, and I’m still home. I called in late. REALLY late. Fuck this shit.

looks like we’re closing down early, i may be out of here at noon. if so i’m heading to oak park for lunch at flat top and borat at the lake.

can we discuss something that doesn’t revolve around breasts, please?

all tits all day, huh?

get one sense of humor

would prefer two breasts.

weh

ok, so in front of the desk i’m sitting at today is a window. out this window is a grass area about 50 yards by 50 yards surrounded on 3 sides by a series of buildings. it tends to create a weird circular wind thing in the field. so just a moment ago there was a strong gust that pulled up snow from the ground and blew it into the air. the gust was so strong and lasted so long that it looked like snow was falling in reverse, going from the ground into the sky.

this is the end of days, isn’t it. c’mon, you can tell me.

I am working from home today, on the futon, under a comforter, a cat sleeping on my lap. It’s nice.

my friend has the most affectionate cat ever but her dog chases him away whenever kitty tries to get my attention. the dog doesn’t realize he weighs roughly 70 lbs more than the kitty.

xpost I think I may make an argument for doing the same.

Did any of you get stuck around the red line chicago stop fire?!?!?! Dan almost had to be evacuated! I was worried.

Orchids sounds like a good topic, Sarah!

Ugh. I had to drive Emm4 downtown this morning, and the roads were completely horrible and it took like AN HOUR. Then I tried to call in sick but it didn’t take, so here I am at work (and I’ll have to make up a couple hours tonight or this weekend), and I have a headache from putting off coffee for too long.

Yeah, this morning was ridiculous. I just got to work a few minutes ago because I had to a) scrape off my car, b) drive to Kr’s place to pick up the gift certificate to Redhead Piano Bar, where we’re going tonight, and c) wait for the Brown Line, all while d) stomping through wet snow with e) more snow blowing into my hair and face and f) carrying a box of 40 CDs.

Then I tried to call in sick but it didn’t take

Haha. How so?

I shouldn’t post too much today because I am hoping to finish editing this gigantic 18-page article about The Year in Computers.

Red line fire? Amanda, Dan is okay, I take it?

Then I tried to call in sick but it didn’t take

I did the same thing. I’m resentfully going to work.

I’m confused. I thought that snow didn’t faze Chicago? Why is it such a cluster fuck out there? I feel like I’m back in NC.

Yeah — he’s alright. Apparently he was on the last train that made it to Chicago before things got all messed up, but he was trapped underground for the better part of an hour. Scary.

In other news, I think I have some sort of wrist problem! It has hurt severely for days now. I made doc appt. I feel old and creaky.

Haha. How so?

I said I was calling in sick for the morning, but then I hedged and mumbled something about car trouble. I should know by now that my boss is a nice guy but he’s strictly by the book, and you must be SICK to take a sick day. He was all “well, accounting doesn’t allow you to use that time for anything other than being sick, so...”.

Basically I’m forced to lie so he has plausible deniability, I guess, not that anyone would ever question it.

Like that time I couldn’t use a sick day when I missed my flight out of New Orleans, but if I had been SICK and missed my flight it would’ve been cool.

Personally speaking, I was unprepared for the snow because the first snowfall of the year wasn’t just a light dusting, it was a serious fucking snowfall — and also because IT WAS IN THE MID-60s ON TUESDAY.

In a way, laziness is a sickness.

Better dose up the lazy people with Lyproxin, or Epetrex in a pinch. These drugs have been specifically designed to cure laziness with a mininum of side effects.

omg i just got an email from a student telling me that she can’t come to class tomorrow. she signed it

“west wishes”

hey, i’m going to the bookstore to do some xmas shopping and i’ll be picking up a book for myself, anyone reading anything that’s knocked their socks off? blown wind up their skirt? otherwise affected their clothing?

West wishes, my pretties!

I am thoroughly enjoying BITCHfest: Ten Years of Cultural Criticism from the Pages of Bitch Magazine. Also good: Death in the Haymarket: A Story of Chicago, the First Labor Movement, and the Bombing That Divided Gilded Age America and Radical Unionism in the Midwest, 1900–1950.

Wow. I can’t wait for break and fiction.

Death in the Haymarket and Radical Unionism in the Midwest are two different books. Sorry.

I am bored with that Simon Reynolds book. So I went to the library the other day and got THE RULES OF ATTRACTION by BRET EASTON ELLIS and THE BLIND ASSASSIN by MARGARET ATWOOD.

i almost bought death in the haymarket last time i was at the bookstore! when i was an everyday green line rider i used to look for the spot of the riot on my trips into the loop, it’s a parking lot now. :(

THE BLIND ASSASSIN is partially on the recommendation of that bartender at that one bar that I met Jeff and Jenny at before we went to Hema’s Kitchen with those people, you know the dude who looks like Tom Cruise? But remember the bartender who was like quoting Margaret Atwood poems at us?

I keep meaning to read The Blind Assassin. I just bought the new Richard Powers novel, The Echo Maker.

That just won the National Book Award, right?

yes! I’ve been so out of the (contemporary) fiction loop I hadn’t even realized he had a new novel.

Where’s Jesse? I had a dream about him last night where he brought a witch* into our house to do cocaine in our bathroom but I was trying to take a bath, sort of, or just make a tub full of non-newtonian fluid with baking soda and water (I was trying to walk on the bath water but kept failing) and our landlord, or a representative of the property company anyway, was hanging out in our living room and suggested that maybe we shouldn’t let Jesse stay with us anymore if he was going to bring witches over to do coke in the bathroom.

*

Whoops.

*

For Laurel, if you haven’t already seen it (though I suspect you probably have).

I had not, despite the fact that one of our books is reviewed in it! Esp like the end bit re GOODNIGHT, MOON. She’s right.

Also, we had a huge house party and I ran into this guy I used to have a big old crush on in high school and he was kind of puffy and old looking (as happens alas) and he had ten kids by a number of different women and he kept picking me up and saying, “Wow, I can’t believe it’s you!” and then I spilled a cooler full of ice and raw chicken all over the floor and accidentally wiped my hands on one of his ten kids and he got angry and stopped talking to me.

Hey, I just read THE BLIND ASSASSIN. It was pretty alright. Goes on a little too long.

I am reading a nonfiction book about the birth and the eventual death of the universe. It’s actually really readable, but I’m still having trouble motivating myself to read it because I’ve gotten lazy about having to think about what I’m reading. It’s all sciencey.

I want to read the new Pynchon, as well as this novel called “Measuring the World” by some German author, and that poisons book that Laurel mentioned, but I have all 3 on my amazon wishlist so I have to wait until after xmas and see if anyone gets any of them for me.

I want to read the new JOAN DIDION OMNIBUS. I’ve never really read her before, although I’ve picked up random volumes like The White Album or Slouching Toward Bethlehem from bookstore shelves and been like “hmmmm.” Wait, maybe I got one out of the library and didn’t like it. Anyway, I still want to give her another shot.

I love her, John! but the pinefox doesn’t. :(

Horseshoe has a spreadsheet TOO?!?!?!

I’m reading some more Dashiell Hammet stuff, and then onto the Omnivore’s Dilemma.

I’m going out for FISH FRY tonight. Sooo excited, I’m going to throw down like I was Catholic.

Horseshoe is the nu-Jocelyn, I have decided.

In other news, croissants are fucking delicious.

SO, my step-family is a little nutsoriffic and started a holiday traditional a few years ago of having a Christmas costume party wherein the guests must dress up as something fitting within a pre-determined holiday-themed category. I have managed to escape this particular indignity by coming home after the party happens but this year, they’ve scheduled around our visit. The theme this year is “Christmas ornament.” My mother’s plan:

We have all been directed to dress as some sort of an ornament. I’m going to drink a lot on the way to the party and come as a light.

I’m thinking we can all get loaded and go as a string of lights...

We can take turns passing out and go as a string of blinking lights.

And before anyone gets all up in arms, I seem to recall Jocelyn making reference to the Pinefox shortly after she started posting to the Chicago thread in late 2004. Although I tried to find this and all I found was us making plans to go to IRAZU with Adamrl.

Your jokes are meaningless to those of us without spreadsheet access.

You also mentioned that Sayjal had an improv show.

Remember when we saw each other after Undertow at the CIFF?

In other news, croissants are fucking delicious.

That’s why they call them croissants.

I don’t know who Jocelyn is, but okay. I don’t think I’m as good at the spreadsheet thing as John, but I do tend to remember posts that I like. and Amanda, pinefox and I had an argument about Didion really recently on ILBooks.

TS: cancelling an already booked show at an out-of-town club we’ve never played so that we can take a much better show at another out-of-town club we’ve never played, opening for an indie-rock legend, and risking being blackballed from first club forever VERSUS playing already booked show and probably losing lots of potential new fans that would be at indie-rock legend’s show?