domestic outrages chronicle

fruit flies

darraghmac, sultans of swing is not the best the best but <3 nonetheless.

aw. if all confessions had that feel-good payoff i'd never have stopped going.

There are so many storms in the area, the weathermen are warning power will likely go out. No rain or lightning here yet but already power is blinking! What an outrage!

what, an outage?

that dodgy pun is better than sultans of swing.

darragh, are there any other burdens on your conscience you would like to set down by posting about them on the sandbox.

why

what have you heard.

that in the distant past you sang with a swing band and your stage name was darraghmac the knife.

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2332/2219267962_6a36f9f819.jpg

it all happened outwith the house and is therefore out of thread's jurisdiction imo

darraghmac the butter knife

that is almost certainly a fat jibe imo

guys

i am outraged by your squabbles

if henry has taught us anything, surely it is to look beyond our minor differences regarding things like sultans of swing (which i'll admit is pretty fuckin sweet if not strictly 'the best')

to be truthful, i only said butter because i wanted to make lxy happy, butter is one of her happiness trigger words (so is partridge).

i don't know who this henry is but he sounds a bit pious.

to summarise, in the disant past darraghmac the butter knife sang with a sultans of swing band.

toi-disant past

happiness, triggered

also i confess that i am slightly gleeful that it's fruit fly season again. harbl, tell us about your jarbl!

i was thinking about the jarbl a couple of nights ago, bc i think we have FFs.

if i discovered ffs i would say ffs

that is exactly what i said

fruit flies are such focused little creatures, you can tell they only think about fruit and how to get closer to fruit and they wish you wouldn't wave them away from the fruit and they hope you will go out to the garden or the store and get some more fruit, etc. they never look at each other except at halloween and only then if they're dressed as plums.

one persistent fucker has been buzzing round my head for a couple of hours.

i should really get up and organize a jarbl but i biked like EIGHT AND A HALF MILES today (which is oh about 8 x further than i've biked in a really long time) and i'm not moving from the couch anytime soon.

oh harbl, i've been meaning to tell you that i made my jarbl from a vietnamese yogurt cup, with holes poked into the lid. it's rather brilliant, i think.

that's perfect! i need a container because i don't want to use a jar i want to keep around. they were gone because i went away for a few days. all i had to do was cut a tomato and they magically reappeared. ARGHHHHHHHHHBLS

this is such a quality thread and

f. overheard me calling a kitchen implement 'fucko'.

― estela

is in my top five favourite posts.

my favourite thing about irl-estela is hearing her swear ^_^

i love this thread and that post too, ruby.

the season's first fruit fly appeared last night.

<3 i've been thinking a lot about how much i loved seeing you all in april.

lately my sister keeps phoning me and calling various people cunts in a pleased defiant voice tone that i have always admired and so far her list has been spot on.

she's trying to finish a phd so she has my sympathy and my ear.

This 8 story office building in downtown Birmingham is seriously infested with fruit flies and needs, like, 1 million jarbls.

Or, 1 gigantic one, suspended in the atrium.

imagine it. it might be quite artistic, if a bit serrano.

I am imagining a peppery jarbl :)

haha 1 million jarbls :)

i hoarded a package of jaffas and now they're stale :(

tsk.

i am acquiring a roommate

he's an acquaintance and is a good dude, although his name does not really suitably accept a -bl at its end.

i am sure it will be fine and perhaps even good, but i don't really want to live with anyone except my ex and my her cat?

i dunno -- it's been quite a while now and there were reasonable reasons for us to have split but somehow it seems even more difficult now than it was a year ago

i had to read this a few times because i wasn't sure if you were talking about getting a new cat or a human roommate. i am very tired.

we accidentally discovered the perfect jarbl concoction this week: whiskey soda with lime and ice, half consumed and left on the counter amidst myriad other neglected drinking, dining, and cooking accoutrements, till it becomes opaque and develops a thickish skin. the friut flies just dive right in and pickle themselves, even without the trickery of t-cut cellophane.

disgusting but effective.

we wondered why the invasion had abated mid-season, despite the unwashedness of practically every dish in the house, when all the while the wee drunks were quietly drowning their sorrows in a forgotten cocktail hiding behind a stack of plates.

i found some camping inside a plastic bag i had left on the table because it had a tomato inside :(

i'm sorry that's not why i left it on the table. i left it on the table because i am disgusting. the flies were in the bag because a tomato was inside.

i'm not sorry that's not why i left it on the table. i'm sorry in general.

<3

it makes me laugh with such great fondness harbl

although his name does not really suitably accept a -bl at its end.

i simply cannot parse this

but i'm sorry, mookieproof, that you're feeling blue. breaking up is hard to do.

me: i don't know why it makes me so happy to post about jarbls, but it does.
jergins: not a bad thing.