should I or should I not fly to a faraway place to murder someone?

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Laurel OTM

― Allyzay P. Boxcars (trm), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:04 (seventeen years ago) link

no, he's never made me feel inadequate about that. He came here because he married an American woman, and not for green card status. (they divorced because they didn't get along and she cheated on him) xpost

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:04 (seventeen years ago) link

oh, okay. I was being overpresumptuous. he's probably just bad about email.

― horseshoe (horseshoe), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:05 (seventeen years ago) link

ha ha, I admit having the currently most famous thread on ILE sandbox is cheering me up

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:05 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, honestly, other people round this board can verify that I am notoriously bad at myspacing them back, returning e-mails, even getting me on the phone because I just hate to answer my phone, I would hate for one of them to kill me over it :D

― Allyzay P. Boxcars (trm), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:07 (seventeen years ago) link

Jesus, Ally, would it kill you to write me back once in a while? I thought we were friends.....

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:07 (seventeen years ago) link

Also, OMG, I cannot stop eating these cookies, they're the PERFECT toll house batch.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:08 (seventeen years ago) link

I gave that guy so many blowjobs. I think he would need a whole week to forget me.

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:08 (seventeen years ago) link

I wish I was laurel right now: drunk and eating cookies

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:09 (seventeen years ago) link

You don't, really; I have to be at work at 9am, I haven't done laundry in about a month, and I'm completely single.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:11 (seventeen years ago) link

Also, the cigarettes are going to kill me sooner or later.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:11 (seventeen years ago) link

ha ha, we should totally invent an "if you like pina colados" type scenario where we make up a profile and contact him.

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:13 (seventeen years ago) link

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:14 (seventeen years ago) link

can I say that my racism against my own people has been totally vindicated in this instance? I knew this dude was desi!

― horseshoe (horseshoe), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:15 (seventeen years ago) link

dudes are valuing blowjobs less and less these days, it's all about the come on the face.

― Allyzay P. Boxcars (trm), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:15 (seventeen years ago) link

Thanks, but I don't think an open relationship would work out -- it's only a matter of time until I burn someone with a cigarette. Or four. Jealous streak, me.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:16 (seventeen years ago) link

killing them won't bring them back

― Ronan (Ronan), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:16 (seventeen years ago) link

No, but it does make them yours forever.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:17 (seventeen years ago) link

It helps if you keep the head.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:17 (seventeen years ago) link

Right, I'll be returning all of YOUR e-mails promptly from now on...

― Allyzay P. Boxcars (trm), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:18 (seventeen years ago) link

dudes are valuing blowjobs less and less these days, it's all about the come on the face.
like I said, I'm memorable!
xpost

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:18 (seventeen years ago) link

anonymous TMI ILE frenzy represent!

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:19 (seventeen years ago) link

oh laurel hooray. someday we shall meet, when i am not hungover on mondays. hey i got a new niece today!

(old niece + new niece)
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/165/387596699_924931afeb.jpg

― m00kiepr00f (m00kiepr00f), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:19 (seventeen years ago) link

cuetys!

― horseshoe (horseshoe), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:19 (seventeen years ago) link

congratulations!

― horseshoe (horseshoe), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:19 (seventeen years ago) link

I see we are on the same page, then, I would shake your hand and purchase you one beer. uh xpost but I'll buy the baby a beer too.

― Allyzay P. Boxcars (trm), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:20 (seventeen years ago) link

dang it, babies trump melodrama

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:21 (seventeen years ago) link

Congratulations!! Is everyone in fine health? I dunno about the new niece, but the old one looks like a keeper. Someday I will be an aunt and there will be children's books galore!

Also, we have already met, silly, at a FAP that Ally & TOMBOT came to.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:21 (seventeen years ago) link

hooray for babies that aren't mine. ally, i will drink that beer

― m00kiepr00f (m00kiepr00f), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:21 (seventeen years ago) link

haha, well. someday we will meet when i am not already so drunk that ppl think i'm "special" (july 2005)...

― m00kiepr00f (m00kiepr00f), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:24 (seventeen years ago) link

:D I love youse guys all is forgiven.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:26 (seventeen years ago) link

http://img398.imageshack.us/img398/4348/martimonial1ms4.jpg

― friday on the porch (lfam), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:41 (seventeen years ago) link

yes, those websites really are quite amazing. Hours of entertainment

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 05:44 (seventeen years ago) link

his profile isn't really I want to get married...it's more like, this is stupid, but what the heck. (he started it after his divorce, but before me, and I guess he did not want to give up. Understandable, there are things I started before him that I didn't want to give up either) But it bugs me if he's leading on some chick(s) who's('re) really looking to get hitched.

― damndoodyballs (DDDD____DDDD), Monday, 12 February 2007 06:13 (seventeen years ago) link

He's looking for a cheap maid for when he's married to you so you won't have to cook and clean.

― StanM (StanM), Monday, 12 February 2007 07:29 (seventeen years ago) link

you are drawn to unavailable men, seek therapy now and mb u can have a healthy relationship one day in the distant future

― aidsy (aidsy), Monday, 12 February 2007 09:23 (seventeen years ago) link

When travelling long distance for the purposes of killing one should favour ground tranportation such as the train or bus as it is much less harmful to the environment.

― Ed (dali), Monday, 12 February 2007 10:55 (seventeen years ago) link

Yes, consider your carbon footprint when arranging murderous expeditions! I suggest you travel via pogo stick or space-hopper.

― C J (C J), Monday, 12 February 2007 10:59 (seventeen years ago) link

this thread has convinced me that we clearly need a "rolling ASK DRUNK ALLYZAY AND LAUREL FOR RELATIONSHIP ADVICE thread"

― a_p (a_p), Monday, 12 February 2007 13:39 (seventeen years ago) link

dang it, babies trump melodrama

T-SHIRT SLOGAN

― Jesus Dan (dan perry), Monday, 12 February 2007 14:46 (seventeen years ago) link

When travelling long distance for the purposes of killing one should favour ground tranportation such as the train or bus as it is much less harmful to the environment.
-- Ed (dal...) (webmail), February 12th, 2007 10:55 AM. (dali) (later)

I love that Ed's such a hippy even on a hypothetical murder thread.

― ailsa_xx (ailsa_xx), Monday, 12 February 2007 14:52 (seventeen years ago) link

you should wear terry cloth nappies as well. Disposable nappies are terribly non-biodegradeable.

― Ed (dali), Monday, 12 February 2007 14:56 (seventeen years ago) link

Isn't murder giving a little carbon back?

― onimo (nu_onimo), Monday, 12 February 2007 14:56 (seventeen years ago) link

+ removing dude's lifetime carbon footprint

― onimo (nu_onimo), Monday, 12 February 2007 14:56 (seventeen years ago) link

All about emissions trading innit

― onimo (nu_onimo), Monday, 12 February 2007 14:57 (seventeen years ago) link

It certainly reduces the amount of carbon dioxide exhaled over the rest of the life expectancy. Doing the world a favor, why not?

XP hah

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 12 February 2007 14:57 (seventeen years ago) link

I would like to state for the record that I was not drunk last night!

― Allyzay heard you got beat up in a club. (Allyzay Eisenschefter), Monday, 12 February 2007 14:58 (seventeen years ago) link

I just love the idea that some murder victim's last memory is Ed derangedly pogo sticking over to them with a long knife.

― Michael White (Miguelito), Monday, 12 February 2007 15:06 (seventeen years ago) link

At least they wouldn't have it for long...

― kv_nol (kv_nol), Monday, 12 February 2007 15:17 (seventeen years ago) link

Kartik Raman looks a bit like Louis Jagger to me. FYI.

― Allyzay heard you got beat up in a club. (Allyzay Eisenschefter), Monday, 12 February 2007 15:55 (seventeen years ago) link

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