Excelsior thread! Lots of laughs, rolling on the floor lauging, umm, maybe we should think of some short ways of saying that...

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I wish I could find the one of the woman shitting a whole fish onto a plate. Head first. Unscaled, near as I could tell. At least a 4-pounder. Now how did that get in there?

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 00:29 (seventeen years ago) link

when we send up Pioneer 14, the plaque should be engraved with goatse

― a_p (a_p), Thursday, 14 December 2006 00:39 (seventeen years ago) link

fer realz

― latebloomer's mayan name is tapir ballz (clonefeed), Thursday, 14 December 2006 00:53 (seventeen years ago) link

tubgirl would be worse still if the fluid were red...

― I am the best lyrocost since Dylan (Scourage), Thursday, 14 December 2006 01:04 (seventeen years ago) link

That's right. Let's think of the ways that tubgirl could be made worse.

― PPlains (PPlains), Thursday, 14 December 2006 01:31 (seventeen years ago) link

mods: please make this a PEW thread.
-- grady (goforgrad...), December 14th, 2006 2:29 AM. (grady)

― has been plagued with problems since its erection in 1978 (nklshs), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:26 (seventeen years ago) link

what if IEDs were rainbows? what if suicide bombers were made of taffy and exploded into flavor? what if razorblades were chocolate?
-- deep space nine (a.brother.runs.this.shi...), December 14th, 2006.

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Are those lyrics to a lost Bush song, gear?
-- milo (wooderso...), December 14th, 2006.

― thebingo (thebingo), Thursday, 14 December 2006 16:11 (seventeen years ago) link

lol

― hoo keeps it steen/and they love that shit (hoosteen), Thursday, 14 December 2006 22:01 (seventeen years ago) link

when are they going to auction the cylinder recording of thriller pressed on michael jackson's dick??

-- friday on the porch (l...), December 15th, 2006.

i would definitely be willing to break into my friend's account to bid $150,000 for that

-- friday on the porch (l...), December 15th, 2006.

― I crank up hoosteen flows/spit spats what's that (hoosteen), Friday, 15 December 2006 05:03 (seventeen years ago) link

STRANGER: Hey there. Nice penis.
MY FRIEND: Thanks! I work out.

-- PPlains (pleasant.plain...), December 15th, 2006. (later)

― Michael White (Miguelito), Friday, 15 December 2006 16:12 (seventeen years ago) link

from sandbox nose rofflez:

http://xkcd.com/verizon/verizon.jpg

― kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Friday, 15 December 2006 17:39 (seventeen years ago) link

Also from noize rofflez:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v296/WilliamCrump63/Lovecrafty.jpg

― Jesus Dan (dan perry), Friday, 15 December 2006 18:29 (seventeen years ago) link

I feel sorry for the people, like my boss (whose digestive system seems to be in sync with mine), whose shit smells the same all the time. How boring their lives must be.

-- Bryan (twp62y...), December 15th, 2006. (later)

― Ms Misery (MsMisery), Friday, 15 December 2006 19:24 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm claiming my rightful credit for Lovecrafty...urghonomic left my name off when he noisecelsored me.

― I Am Curious (George) (Slight Return) (Rock Hardy), Friday, 15 December 2006 20:33 (seventeen years ago) link

On the new Clipse:

I really have trouble with how this album is being sold as some dark glimpse into harsh reality or whatever when half the lyrics are about thousand dollar jeans with mountain lions stitched on the crotch

-- Al (hoteloper...), December 15th, 2006.

― forksclovetofu (forksclovetofu), Friday, 15 December 2006 21:35 (seventeen years ago) link

haha

― baby wizard sex (gbx), Friday, 15 December 2006 21:41 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah that was crumpw. i figured everyone would see the orig! sorry man

― urghonomic (gcannon), Friday, 15 December 2006 21:46 (seventeen years ago) link

17. My penis is hanging out and you have no idea.
-- Thermo Thinwall (tupac.chopr...), December 15th, 2006.

― i kick hoostenical flows/spit spat wahts what (hoosteen), Friday, 15 December 2006 21:58 (seventeen years ago) link

This thread needs Bryan.
-- Thermo Thinwall (tupac.chopr...), December 15th, 2006.

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No we do NOT need reiterations of the well-worn & highly traumatic I POOPED ME PANTALOONS stories. This is about shitting in stalls.
-- David RER (quoteidio...), December 15th, 2006.

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:-(
-- Bryan (twp62y...), December 15th, 2006.

― our hoo could be your steen (hoosteen), Saturday, 16 December 2006 00:00 (seventeen years ago) link

:-(

― Bryan (twp62yo), Saturday, 16 December 2006 02:05 (seventeen years ago) link

srsly, roffles were had.

― u got yr hoo in my steen! (no reese's) (hoosteen), Saturday, 16 December 2006 02:13 (seventeen years ago) link

― Bryan (twp62yo), Saturday, 16 December 2006 02:27 (seventeen years ago) link

I very rapidly lost the plot, drank like a sailor, and then quit.

-- Trayce (spamspanke...), December 16th, 2006 6:38 AM. (later)

― jergins (jergins), Saturday, 16 December 2006 06:53 (seventeen years ago) link

When I was a cocktail waitress , I would amuse my co-workers by calling myself "Rain Waitress". This involved me wandering around and saying "This is Definitely not my section. Definitely not my section. One-two-three-four. Can I go home now? This is definitely not my section."

-- aimurchie (aimurchi...) (webmail), December 17th, 2006 1:49 PM. (aimurchie) (later) (link)

― I Am Curious (George) (Slight Return) (Rock Hardy), Sunday, 17 December 2006 15:01 (seventeen years ago) link

Why's mine funny? :(

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 17 December 2006 21:48 (seventeen years ago) link

cos i read it 'drank a sailor'

― sede vacante (blueski), Sunday, 17 December 2006 21:50 (seventeen years ago) link

phrasing

― jergins (jergins), Sunday, 17 December 2006 21:57 (seventeen years ago) link

It doesn't bother me, but you should see my girlfriend's inbox...

-- Tuomas (lixnix...), December 18th, 2006 3:09 PM. (Tuomas) (later)

― RJG (RJG), Monday, 18 December 2006 15:54 (seventeen years ago) link

Your girlfriend is called "Ice"?

-- Tuomas (lixnix...), December 18th, 2006.

― temporary enrique (temporary enrique), Monday, 18 December 2006 16:03 (seventeen years ago) link

miss misery, pls don't associate my name with mickey's
-- Chad Bouche (wrinklepaws
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you are a meme now, tough luck.
-- Ms Misery

― SandboxAnna (SandboxAnna), Monday, 18 December 2006 16:33 (seventeen years ago) link

for those who haven't been following the nfl thread, a brief recap:

"I heard you got beat up in a club. I didn't mean to offend nobody but Kellen Winslow. I apologized and am moved on."
-- Allyzay is cool: with Blue n White, with Eli Manning, with NY Giants

― jhoshea (jhoshea), Monday, 18 December 2006 17:01 (seventeen years ago) link

x-post

lolz I was about to post that.

― hoo got it for steen, vol. 2 (hoosteen), Monday, 18 December 2006 23:35 (seventeen years ago) link

I think he's been threatening to make that Poe film since Rocky III.
-- Dr M (wjwe...), December 18th, 2006.

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RamPoe
-- latebloomer: glutton for PUNishment (posercore24...), December 18th, 2006.

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Poebra
-- latebloomer: glutton for PUNishment (posercore24...), December 18th, 2006.

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TangPoe and Cash
-- latebloomer: glutton for PUNishment (posercore24...), December 18th, 2006.

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Poe-ver the Top
-- latebloomer: glutton for PUNishment (posercore24...), December 18th, 2006.

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Rocky BalPoea II: Adrian, Nevermore
-- remy bean (rem...), December 18th, 2006.

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The Masque of the Dredd Death
-- latebloomer: glutton for PUNishment (posercore24...), December 18th, 2006.

― hoo got it for steen, vol. 2 (hoosteen), Monday, 18 December 2006 23:46 (seventeen years ago) link

http://ilx.thehold.net/thread.php?msgid=47165#unread

...leading to:

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000065V3S.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

-- this is cutty (holle...) (webmail), December 19th, 2006 2:48 AM. (mcutt) (later) (link)

― I Am Curious (George) (Slight Return) (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 02:54 (seventeen years ago) link

grr.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000065V3S.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

― I Am Curious (George) (Slight Return) (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 02:56 (seventeen years ago) link

totally serious question: "what is a 'stan,' as the term is used by blog fruitflies?"

― hoo got it for steen, vol. 2 (hoosteen), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 04:39 (seventeen years ago) link

T/S: Lil Wayne's "Georgia Bush" vs. Luda's "Georgia"

― Matt Cibula (Formerly, the Haikunym), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 05:55 (seventeen years ago) link

I remember when my dad was questioned over the Yorkshire ripper incident. The police were sat in our lounge talking to him and my mum walked past with a pile of laundry and joked: "oh Keith, I wish you wouldn't get so many blood stains on your clothes".

-- Ste (ste.foste...), December 19th, 2006 10:29 AM. (fuzzy) (link)

― StanM (StanM), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 10:36 (seventeen years ago) link

Exactly, it's like taking some wee cnut to court for claiming to have fucked your mother.

-- Onimo has his finger in the stink (gerry.wat...) (webmail), Today 12:39 PM. (nu_onimo) (later) (admin) (userip)

"but Gerry, I'm your Dad!"
"yer a wee cnut!"

-- Onimo has his finger in the stink (gerry.wat...) (webmail), Today 12:40 PM. (nu_onimo) (later) (admin) (userip)

― grimly fiendish (simon), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 12:56 (seventeen years ago) link

this thread has a promising mundanity:civility ratio
-- step hen faps (curtis.stephen...), December 19th, 2006 7:50 AM. (Curt1s Stephens)

― has been plagued with problems since its erection in 1978 (nklshs), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 15:00 (seventeen years ago) link

besides, I'm not a racist...I've had sex with several black chicks in my day...

-- PEW (HouseholdNam...), December 19th, 2006 3:39 PM.

― sede vacante (blueski), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 16:36 (seventeen years ago) link

my idolator list:

beach house, beach house
girl talk, night ripper
liars, drums not dead
yyys, show yr bones
clipse, hhnf
blow, paper tv
rapture, pieces of the people
supersystem, million microphones
camp lo, fort apache: the mixtape
think about life, think about life

lcd soundsystem, 45:33
snowden, like bullets
delorean, time breaks off
t.i., what you know
beach house, master of none
the clipse, wamp wamp
fiery furnaces, benton harbor
gnarls barkley, crazy
justin timberlake, my love
midlake, roscoe

ray barreto, acid
karen dalton, in my own time
tortoise, a lazarus taxon
pavement, wowee zowee
willie colon, el malo

-- Jams Murphy (littleknow...), December 19th, 2006. (ystrickler) (later) (link)

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For one hopeful second there, I thought you wrote your ballot to the tune of "Vogue."
-- Michael Daddino (epicharmu...), December 19th, 2006. (epicharmus) (later) (link)

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 17:25 (seventeen years ago) link

christ had a pre-9/11 mentality

-- and what (an...), December 19th, 2006.

― hoo got it for steen, vol. 2 (hoosteen), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 21:58 (seventeen years ago) link

annoying.. .

― Ms Misery (MsMisery), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 22:08 (seventeen years ago) link

the boldness I mean

― Ms Misery (MsMisery), Tuesday, 19 December 2006 22:09 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah--i'm going to act like it didn't leak until it really leaks

-- this is cutty (holle...), December 20th, 2006.

Taking the piss, I see.

-- Ned Raggett (ne...), December 20th, 2006.

― hoo got it for steen, vol. 2 (hoosteen), Wednesday, 20 December 2006 05:05 (seventeen years ago) link

You've just reminded me what a pathetic, banal title "Nightmares and Dreamscapes" is.

You're entering the vicinity of an area adjacent to a location. The kind of place where there might be a monster or some sort of weird mirror. These are just examples. It could also be something much better. Prepare to enter... The Scary Door.

-- ledge (tomdotledge...), December 20th, 2006. (ledge) (later)

― Michael Annoyman (Michael Annoyman), Wednesday, 20 December 2006 14:15 (seventeen years ago) link

haha I love that this isn't the first Futurama joek excelsiored

― has been plagued with problems since its erection in 1978 (nklshs), Wednesday, 20 December 2006 14:17 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, in that case it's disqualified for not acknowledging its sources.

― Michael Annoyman (Michael Annoyman), Wednesday, 20 December 2006 14:19 (seventeen years ago) link

IT TURNS OUT IT'S MAN

― sede vacante (blueski), Wednesday, 20 December 2006 14:21 (seventeen years ago) link

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