Excelsior thread! Lots of laughs, rolling on the floor lauging, umm, maybe we should think of some short ways of saying that...

-- DJ Venutian (juror...), November 28th, 2006.

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Dom Passantino is just learning about fortunecity's hotlinking policy.

ZERO TOLERANCE

-- grbchv! (redneckz...), November 28th, 2006. (gbx) (later)

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I'm not a hotlinker, that's what's so insane about this.
-- Dom Passantino (juror...), November 28th, 2006. (DomPassantino) (later)

-- ken c (klaj...), November 29th, 2006 1:17 PM.

ERM NO I DON'T MEAN WANK OLYMPICS

-- ken c (dalfj...), November 29th, 2006 1:17 PM.

Pole vault

-- C J (CJ_The_Unrul...), November 29th, 2006 1:35 PM. (C J)

lacht aus laut?

Freak bed, more like.

-- horseshoe (rosalind51...), December 4th, 2006.

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with all the range and charisma of a junior high school play understudy

-- deep space nine (a.brother.runs.this.shi...), December 4th, 2006.

-- vahid (vfoz...), December 2nd, 2006.

OMG U R MY SOULMATE

-- Rodney Von Bushwickin The Barbarian Mother-Funky Stay High Dollar Billster (rodneyjgreen...), December 2nd, 2006.

The fuck?

-- Rodney Von Bushwickin The Barbarian Mother-Funky Stay High Dollar Billster (rodneyjgreen...), December 2nd, 2006.

That was not supposed to go into this thread.

-- Rodney Von Bushwickin The Barbarian Mother-Funky Stay High Dollar Billster (rodneyjgreen...), December 2nd, 2006.

lol u <3 vahid

-- amon (vvv@gmail.com), December 2nd, 2006.

AT BIBLE STUDY.

-- Laurel (sininspac...), December 4th, 2006

-- Leon Czolgosz (nicole.kessle...), December 4th, 2006.

-- david wilshire iv (wilshir...), December 4th, 2006.

and kate has rubbish indie rape fantasies.

-- Marmot (marmotwolo...), December 4th, 2006.

-- GALKIN (GALKI...), December 4th, 2006. (later)

-- teeny (teenydream...), Today 11:36 PM. (teeny) (later) (link)

Hey, Steve, how would you rewrite this sentence: "I'm a fanny"?

-- Eyeball Kicks (eyeballkick...) (webmail), December 5th, 2006 1:23 AM. (Eyeball Kicks) (later) (admin)

I'd probably rewrite it as: "Kiss my ass"

-- steve schneeberg (steve.schne...) (webmail), December 5th, 2006 1:29 AM. (steve go1dberg) (later) (admin)

-- lexpretend (lexusjee...), December 5th, 2006.

Sexual experience precludes hobbies. Just in adolescence and early adulthood or throughout a whole life? What about married audiophiles with $200k hi-fis, or fishermen, or anything? Once you've had sex you can't be arsed with culture or interests anymore so you just watch bad evening TV when not having sex?

-- Sick Mouthy (njsouthal...), December 5th, 2006.

the RIAA come round and bum you personally

-- sede vacante (n...), December 5th, 2006.

my life's been downhill all the way since i got laid

-- tissp! (tissp2...), December 5th, 2006.

as if those questions need to be answered. go ahead and pretend there's no correlation between teenage virginity and passionate, time consuming hobbies. we were both teenage virgins once, nick.

-- hm (mi...), December 5th, 2006.

Speak for yourself. I'm from Devon and had several pet dogs as a child.

-- Sick Mouthy (njsouthal...), December 5th, 2006.

(courtesy of forksclovetofu)

"nothing, he was too weak to talk, because he had been poisoned by a radioactive isotope that is deadly when ingested!"

-- Euai Kapaui (tracerhan...), December 5th, 2006.

what is awesome

that german pic is possibly the single funniest thing i've ever seen on excelsior though - just made me spurt my drink up my nose, which hurt, but was so worth it.

Three people this week have told me to buy a laptop
and three times I have denied them

― you are a baby seal (Abbott), Thursday, December 8, 2011 9:00 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Permalink

you are the judas of laptops.

― estela, Thursday, December 8, 2011 9:10 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Permalink

re: "Moves Like Jagger"

why can't i rep for something as stupid but catchy if you get to rep for Cee-Lo Smeezington?

― some dude (Mr. Stevenson #2), Friday, December 9, 2011 3:30 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

because "Fuck You" is like a beautiful pastiche of 70s soul and 00s pop and this song is like a Pokemon diharrea fight

― boof troop (dealwithit.gif), Friday, December 9, 2011 5:46 PM Bookmark Permalink

oh DAMMIT, I was going to post a link to a Boston place that had a drink on their menu made with veal stock but they've since taken it off of their menu

it was called the ABATTOIR

http://www.citysbest.com/boston/news/2011/03/28/weird-cocktail-of-the-week-veal-stock-martini-at-the-gallows/

― OH NOES, Friday, December 9, 2011 2:46 PM (18 minutes ago)

Try ABATTOIR. It will slaughter you!

― M. White, Friday, December 9, 2011 2:48 PM (17 minutes ago)

From this post forward

$10,000 bet was amazing. Romney fucked this debate up in an incredible way.

― Adrien Brony (step hen faps), Sunday, 11 December 2011 05:37 (9 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

"I will bet one night with my wife that you are incorrect"

― Dranke, the German Drake Impersonator (forksclovetofu), Sunday, 11 December 2011 05:46 (9 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

"which wife"

― HOOS aka driver of steen, Sunday, 11 December 2011 05:51 (9 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

"mr. gingrich, please wait until you're being addressed"

― Dranke, the German Drake Impersonator (forksclovetofu), Sunday, 11 December 2011 06:00 (9 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

In re: Childish Gambino:

--

wow i just heard this and oh shit i don't like it

― remy bean in exile, Monday, December 12, 2011 11:56 AM

I got a girl on my arm dude, show respect
Something crazy, an Asian, Virginia Tech
She too fine
I do dimes

― remy bean in exile, Monday, December 12, 2011 12:00 PM (53 minutes ago)

Something crazy, an Asian, Virginia Tech

haha is this real?

― boof troop (dealwithit.gif), Monday, December 12, 2011 12:01 PM (52 minutes ago)

Sadly, yes.

― I left my login in El Sandboxo, Monday, December 12, 2011 12:07 PM (45 minutes ago)

i dont think even iatee could defend that line.

― big popppa hoy, Monday, December 12, 2011 12:14 PM (39 minutes ago)

I don't actually like this guy I was just bored the other day

― iatee, Monday, December 12, 2011 12:17 PM (35 minutes ago)

solitary posts that effortlessly sum up ilx

― Mordy, Monday, December 12, 2011 12:47 PM (5 minutes ago)

i'm super good friends with several ilxors now, it's a little weird telling people how we met since we didn't know each other growing up or in college or working together. i almost just want to say we met high fiving at a gloryhole behind the lake street kmart because it sounds less lame.

― slandblox goole, Tuesday, December 13, 2011 12:31 PM (17 minutes ago) Bookmark Permalink

I met someone during a Lake Street Kmart gloryhole high-five. It wasn't the lamest thing I did that day.

http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQQE3lldhDfMVri0UgKlO0GO_D2ROcOLRKq0t1trNoL4UvbuHd2Bw

Yes I know it is Too Soon (c) but I could not help myself in the land of unfortunate headlines.

http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lwa8osRq9P1qz6z0no1_500.jpg

I guess I need the misfortune of that one explained to me. Because of the slang slash = piss?

✔

because of the slang

POLLemicist who SLANGED all, freely, with wit
look i ilxed it

Oh, WmC, you innocent. Slash is one of the following:

Champagne
Lobster
Anal sex
Picnics

would you care to guess which?

I only knew the cut, piss and sexy fanfic meanings.

(actually yes I know, technically it doesn't have to involve anal sex (though it mostly does, because it's totally a slash ~thing~) but it's phrase that's been repeated often in his threads so my mind made the obvious leap)

I got an email the other day from someone who put one space BEFORE every fullstop and no spaces afterwards. BONKERS.

― los krampusinos! (pomplamau5), Friday, 16 December 2011 13:20 (52 minutes ago) Permalink

^ not how I remember Chuck D's lyric

― nashwan, Friday, 16 December 2011 13:22 (50 minutes ago)

yeah i was gonna post that one

things that shd happen to ppl who say 'pandas are an evolutionary dead end & shd be left to die out'

(...after several quite imaginative suggestions:)

they should be pissed and shat upon by a panda.

― another suggestbanite (rusty flathead screwdriver), Friday, 16 December 2011 12:29 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Permalink

LOLled

deep down we're all a little bit straight, Tuomas

― Extreme Lifestyle, Friday, December 16, 2011 1:47 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Permalink

This pic wins excelsior FOREVER

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lwazoqN7pv1qdmmiqo1_400.gif

-Z S

The use of "lady doctor" has faded considerably, now that women are not only going to med school in greater numbers, but are often choosing to serve in the less glamorous roles of family medicine and pediatrics, so they are often one's main doctor. As for "female musician", I have never encountered it. Not once. And I don't seem to be a carrier for the idea that musicians are male by default. Composers and conductors, otoh...

"Male nurse" is still going strong, although they are less of a rarity now.

― Aimless, Monday, 19 December 2011 19:28 (Yesterday) Permalink

i have yet to encounter "lady doctor" within the field of medicine

― river wolf, Monday, 19 December 2011 19:52 (Yesterday) Permalink

Anyone run into "lady strawman" yet?

― C.K. Dexter Holland, Monday, 19 December 2011 19:52 (Yesterday) Permalink

Chris Martin is right! I don't like his music but if listening to OK Computer got him that babe Gwyneth then you can't say it's that terrible!

― billy goat, Wednesday, December 21, 2011 12:27 PM Bookmark Permalink

Gwyneth was totally insufferable and intolerable until, like, 3 years ago?

― OH NOES, Wednesday, December 21, 2011 12:37 PM Bookmark Permalink

and now she's . . . ?

― Daniel, Esq., Wednesday, December 21, 2011 12:38 PM Bookmark Permalink

vegan!

― flexidisc, Wednesday, December 21, 2011 12:38 PM Bookmark Permalink

lookit the paragraph starting "'Fangtasia,' Pam said" -- there's places where the gaps between words are larger than the words themselves -- now admittedly i. a small subset of people will care and ii. this appears to be from one of those true blood novels so w/e

i don't know, i assume the normal response is "why in the hell would that bother you" and then i say "you don't know it but it's crippling your reading experience" and then i turn into that guy who starts the dynamic range compression threads and refuse to go outside because i might hear some music that's not on my perfectly magnetically balanced insulated and feng shui-ed hi fi system

― thompp, Thursday, December 22, 2011 6:16 PM (2 days ago)

I dont like watching an undead 3D model in an evening gown run awkwardly down hallways for hours at a time for a fleeting external environment money shot

― oPal, Tuesday, December 27, 2011 2:01 AM (10 hours ago)

what game is this a reference to?

― zappi, Tuesday, December 27, 2011 6:59 AM (5 hours ago)

last year at marienbad HD

― Mordy, Tuesday, December 27, 2011 7:01 AM (5 hours ago)

pretty good one from the Games thread

will no one think of the adult straight dudes???

All day.

― Lord Sotosyn, Tuesday, December 27, 2011 1:00 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Permalink

will no one think of Gwyneth Paltrow?

I don't know what tumblr whites is but it sounds like a dryer setting.

― M. White, Thursday, 29 December 2011 17:26 (37 minutes ago) Permalink

haha what thread?

tumblr whites lemonade

Texts from Bennett, LBI

Ta!

denial is just kind of sad past a certain point, even from a total asshole.

― Dr Morbius, Wednesday, December 28, 2011 7:03 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Permalink

:--------------------)

― amon, Wednesday, December 28, 2011 7:08 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Permalink

The Suarez Report is weirdly engrossing. Quite amusing reading references to Mr. Kuyt and so on

― Number None, Sunday, 1 January 2012 18:07 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

I'm sure that was done for his benefit

― slightly upwards of (once a lifetime is ample), Sunday, 1 January 2012 18:40 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Permalink