ILOLX

from I am sitting behind ken c and he appears to be ignoring me...

What should I do? He is loosing at scrabble, should I assist?

-- Ed, Sunday, 27 May 2007 15:47 (42 minutes ago) Link

if you want him to loose

-- RJG, Sunday, 27 May 2007 15:48 (41 minutes ago) Link

ILX 2.3 New Features

Demarcate threads from different days on the new answers page. Note that you're going to have to make sure you have your timezone set up correctly for this. UK people - don't be daft - the UK's timezone is not GMT; it's only GMT in Winter. Set it up to be Europe/London or something!

-- Keith, Sunday, May 27, 2007 2:51 PM (Sunday, May 27, 2007 2:51 PM) Bookmark Link

From Vote for Your Favorite Oink Invite Candidate of 2007!

o - arthurthecrab ("What is rockism? It. Is. Knowing. When. Something. Totally. Fucking. Rocks!")

courtesy j monster

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/249/525145683_eee13d8e2b_m.jpg

From Awkward Graffiti

lol someone i knew long ago spraypainted "huker du" on a prominent public wall.

-- estela, Sunday, 3 June 2007

This whole thread from the Mod Req Board is v v funny.

yeah it is

From L O S T anticipation thread:

When will I be able to buy actual 6-packs of Dharma beer instead of draping a napkin with a hand-drawn Dharma symbol over a can of Keystone Ice? That's what I want to know.

...

-- nickalicious, Wednesday, 6 June 2007

(i <3 nickalicious.)

This is LOL.

Can't spell "test" without S-T-E-T.

-- Pleasant Plains, Thursday, June 7, 2007 5:35 PM (4 days ago) Bookmark Link

If ILX is China, IRE is defiant young Taiwan, pulsing with life and industry.

Confounded, Tuesday, 12 June 2007 20:09 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Link

5 point plan for minimal house takeover

1. covert elements add to gui boratto to urban outfitters playlist
2. advance scouts philip sherburne and ronan fitzgerald secure strategic positions at MTV urge
3. shock + awe: villalobos remixes matisyahu
4. german elements consolidate position with speicher 54: tiesto / darude split
5. fabric teams with hard rock cafe to open locations in las vegas, hollywood, atlantic city and daytona beach offering minimal house DJs and $75 table service.

-- moonship journey to baja, Wednesday, June 13, 2007 12:22 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Link

as long as the course organisers don't spring anything on us

i read 'course organizers' as 'croquet course organizers'. haha, it's a wacky course but not a reason not to come!

Hotmail Lingbert plz to enter 21st century.

-- jergïns, Wednesday, 13 June 2007 18:55

grits are a coarse corn meal, cooked with water like cream of wheat or oatmeal, into a pasty white sludge that is delicious when you add butter, salt, pepper, cheese, whatever you want. big in the southern us.

-- tehresa, Thursday, 14 June 2007 22:58 (3 days ago) Link

add butter add butter add butter add butter add butter add butter add butter add butter add butter add butter add butter add butter

-- jergïns, Thursday, 14 June 2007 23:26 (3 days ago) Link

^reason 156 why i <3 jergins

sodomy beef

-- gershy, Monday, June 18, 2007 7:14 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Link

from http://www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?boardid=54&threadid=654#unread

rodman,

?

-- am0n, Tuesday, 19 June 2007 02:45 (4 hours ago) Link

am0n,

love!
rodman

-- rodman, Tuesday, 19 June 2007 04:08 (3 hours ago) Link

don't care that i was the one that posted it. selvam is rad:

my night shift are make love and sleep.
my night shift are make love and sleep.
my night shift are make love and sleep.

whenever we go out
people always shout
John Fuckdick Roffleheimer Smith

-- jergïns, Friday, June 22, 2007 12:25 PM (Friday, June 22, 2007 12:25 PM) Bookmark Link

v of legs = light
asshole = regular
over ears = Friday

-- Jaq, Friday, June 22, 2007 10:57 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

OH, THAT IS VV RUDE!

hahahahahahahahahaha!

from a poll thread:

where is "all of them" option?

-- lex pretend, Friday, 22 June 2007 08:24 (2 days ago) Link

oops.

here:

O all of them

-- StanM, Friday, 22 June 2007 08:26 (2 days ago) Link

I am so dumb I tried to click this. And I don't even want to vote for them all.

-- Ned Trifle II, Friday, 22 June 2007 08:40 (2 days ago) Link

from why do i stalk ex girlfriend :(

the future of socializing is complicated and retarded

-- am0n, Monday, 25 June 2007 19:24 (Yesterday) Link

what happens when bleaching powder is exposed to air ?

-- shanya sambyal, Sunday, July 2, 2006 5:46 AM (1 year ago) Bookmark Link
Ban User User Info
boom! in yer face beach

-- XD (eman), Sunday, July 2, 2006 6:46 AM (1 year ago) Bookmark Link

NEIFI PEREZ SUSPENDED 25 GAMES FOR BANNED SUBSTANCE

It's true. I heard it on the radio.

-- Andy K, Friday, July 6, 2007 7:56 AM (8 hours ago) Bookmark Link

Posters are coming down across the country.

How to explain this to my son?

-- Andy K, Friday, July 6, 2007 7:57 AM (8 hours ago) Bookmark Link

i am so scared of swearing at work, when i go on lunch breaks i'm like a tourette's sufferer!

-- tehresa, Tuesday, 5 June 2007 23:46

what, u won the america's cup and now you're too good to post here??

-- jergins, Saturday, 7 July 2007 02:37

cio lime Skittle being temporarily replaced by "green slushy" flavor

-- Curt1s Stephens, Thursday, 28 June 2007 03:04 (1 week ago) Link

the saddest cio of all

-- sleep, Thursday, 28 June 2007 03:08 (1 week ago) Link

(yes, it is both funny and sad.)

magnetic cockring = not only it is already invented but the market seems to be saturated. so right now I got nothing :(

-- Sébastien, Tuesday, 10 July 2007 14:35 (2 hours ago) Link

i think everyone needs to take their standards down a couple notches

take note, ladies

-- strongohulkington, Wednesday, July 11, 2007 2:24 PM (41 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

it's better to look good than to go 4 for 4

-- jergïns, Monday, 16 July 2007 04:17 (2 hours ago) Link

OTM

you're like totally a chick... right?

thats when the rules change.

-- chaki, Sunday, 22 July 2007 10:10 (Yesterday) Link

damn, "daisy" was a pretty bad one

-- Confounded, Monday, 23 July 2007 18:40 (4 hours ago) Link

Even I refuse to drink anything called "Unicum".

-- John Justen, Tuesday, 24 July 2007 16:16 (Yesterday) Link

lolo

from john justen and fluffy bear will drink it, regarding some milk drink:

I feel like my throat is wearing wool socks.

-- John Justen, Thursday, July 26, 2007 6:45 PM (13 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

that's all you got? i'm kind of disappointed.

-- chicago kevin, Wednesday, May 30, 2007 9:59 AM (1 month ago) Bookmark Link
Delete Undelete Ban User User Info

KEVASS

-- Lingbert, Wednesday, May 30, 2007 10:09 AM (1 month ago) Bookmark Link

I take you out to the finest resturant
Buy you any damn thing that you want
You want flowers, I'll buy your ass a rose
But later on your coming out them pantie hose
You want gold, girl whats next
It's me and you, doing the sex

-- jergïns, Monday, 30 July 2007 07:54 (7 hours ago) Link

it is a complex relationship with IRE, but sweet

from Heckles that you have known and loved

I always loved the stupidity of the "U-S-A" chants when the Red Wings would put out their line of Kozlov, Federov, Larionov, Konstaniov, et al.

-- bnw (bnw), Monday, 10 May 2004 19:56 (3 years ago) Link

regarding a closed-down strip club in mpls:

I am sure the lovely ladies of Buns & Roses have all finished their MBAs by now, anyway.

-- HI DERE, Thursday, 2 August 2007 21:10 (1 hour ago) Link

ha!

http://www.sternfannetwork.com/forum/images/custom_avatars/avatar29503_12.gif

-- chaki, Friday, 3 August 2007 08:14 (11 hours ago) Link

i just blew on the screen

-- jergïns, Friday, 3 August 2007 18:13 (1 hour ago) Link

tmi

-- gr8080, Friday, 3 August 2007 18:49 (50 minutes ago) Link

lols

-- jergïns, Friday, 3 August 2007 19:01 (38 minutes ago) Link

I arm-wrestled Lady Sov and M.I.A. within two weeks of each other in December 2005, the first after her Empty Bottle show in Chicago and the second at a Pitchfork-related party that Diplo was DJing. Although technically, Lady Sov kind of laughed it off and didn't really go through with it, whereas M.I.A. totally beat me.

-- jaymc, Thursday, 16 August 2007 17:56 (Yesterday) Link

lxy i wud never b heavening with you bcuz u r my friend jergin's wife secretary.

-- Heave Ho, Wednesday, July 11, 2007 1:53 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Link

-- gr8080, Tuesday, 21 August 2007 21:29 (2 days ago) Link

mind fixing a spelling error in a thread title for me?

i'm seeing wu-tand on Sep 1st - how many members will actually show up?

thanks.

-- gr8080, Friday, 17 August 2007 18:49 (1 week ago) Link

Heh. You daft sod. I fixed it.

-- Pashmina, Friday, 17 August 2007 21:44 (1 week ago) Link

<3 Pashmina.

recently, a drunken customer made a direct comment about my "nice tits" and then asked me if i minded/thought anyone would notice, if he had a wank under the table. to which i replied with something like "that's fine, and long as you don't mind me adding $100 to your bill".

-- Rubyredd, Thursday, 23 August 2007 13:47 (49 minutes ago) Link

jon had his birthday at applebees already?!

-- and what, Thursday, 23 August 2007 13:50 (47 minutes ago) Link

-- sanskrit, Thursday, August 23, 2007 7:51 AM (4 days ago) Bookmark Link

if i recall correctly she had a bush like a 40 year old serbian.

― thebingoisback, Sunday, October 4, 2009 11:17 PM

tonight in my speech class someone said said orgasm instead of organism and recovered better than i did. i had to think about dead pets in order to stop laughing.

...

― The Great Jumanji, (La Lechera), Thursday, October 7, 2010 8:24 PM

LOL amon, dr. morbius:

funniest thing about the WSJ blog entry -- that people actually do "online banking." What a buncha darned fools.

― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, December 21, 2010 8:17 AM

...

does that boggle ur stone-age mind or

― vladimir pootawn (am0n), Tuesday, December 21, 2010 8:25 AM

other things "darned fools" do "online": shopping, taxes, reading, chatting!?!?!

― vladimir pootawn (am0n), Tuesday, December 21, 2010 8:29 AM

...

never been ripped off during online chatting and reading funnily enough

― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, December 21, 2010 8:45 AM

I don't think many people are ever ripped off due to online banking, fwiw.

The most you're going to be able to do is view balances, transfer between existing accounts, and view bank account numbers. You know, the same numbers anyone can read off of a check you write.

But checks might be too "damned foolish" too, I don't know.

― mh, Tuesday, December 21, 2010 8:49 AM

thx for the new display name

― old man yells at cloud computing (am0n), Tuesday, December 21, 2010 9:02 AM

...

I prefer barter

also, fuck you am0n

― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, December 21, 2010 9:15 AM

not.. really

there was cider though, and some thing called 'sangrita' which i did not indulge in

― boner graphs (electricsound), Tuesday, December 28, 2010

dunno if i could drink something with 'grit' in the name - like how i can't eat a turducken due to 'turd' being in the name

well nowhere near as bad, but u feel me

― lights out gorilla rodeo (haitch), Tuesday, December 28, 2010

shiitake mushrooms?
cucumber?

― boner graphs (electricsound), Tuesday, December 28, 2010

won't be wearing a cummerbund anytime soon either

― lights out gorilla rodeo (haitch), Tuesday, December 28, 2010

It was to a different MP, but once I printed out the wallogina, put an arrow next to one of them, wrote 'YOU' next to the arrow and posted it to the one who had been a cunt.

― I don't wanna be with nobody but boobs. Oh no. (edwardo), Tuesday, February 15, 2011

when i woke this morning my first thought was OH GREAT ANOTHER GRIM DAY OF CATASTROPHICALLY SPIRALLING SELF-REFLECTION, and then my next was FRA-EE-DAY, FRA-EE-DAY, and then my next was :).

― Antoine Bugleboy (Merdeyeux), Tuesday, March 15, 2011 1:41 PM

and when they rolled back the stone, they found iatee sonning betas in an internet beef

― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Tuesday, June 14, 2011 10:54 AM (3 days ago)

u s steel on taking a trip with her mom. what's not to <3 about this:

...but mostly we like the same stuff (gambling, cheese, scenic drives).

― Deremiah Was a Bullfrog (u s steel), Thursday, June 9, 2011 11:33 PM

stet lol (and a little bit of a dig at ilx's most inveterate admin log watcher):

i cld just get the adming log to also post to this thread, if it'd save you the trouble?

― stet, Tuesday, June 28, 2011 12:23 PM (19 minutes ago)

when you say program java do you mean make coffee because i can do that

― lxy, Thursday, June 30, 2011 7:17 PM

when we were heading to lunch at Paris, we passed a group of frat bros just as they won $38K playing roulette; I cheered for them although I knew at least one of them was likely to die that night

― DJP, Thursday, July 7, 2011 6:21 PM

omg Z S is funny:

there was like a 10-15 second pre-earthquake before the biggest part hit, and from the sounds of the flushing and minor shaking on the floors above and below me, i thought there was a major plumbing problem. my thoughts for the first half of the earthquake were basically "is the water going to shoot up the toilet and into my butt"

― Z S, Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:49 AM

MTV VMA's really brings out the best. LOLLLing that Bieber really said "I'd like to thank not only God, but also Jesus"

― Telephoneface (Adam Bruneau), Monday, August 29, 2011 10:05 AM

holy ghost is all what the fuck am i, invisible?

― zvookster, Monday, August 29, 2011 10:06 AM

<3 caek

at work we each get a subsidised ticket for two litres + 1 chicken. the subsidy comes from the coffee machine. haha i don't drink coffee and i'm going to sell the chicken.

― caek, Monday, September 19, 2011 1:34 PM

Max: I am okay, I am typing this from a phone a man lended to me, since gmail failed I was afraid to use my computer. I spent the night at an Internet cafe here, watching the news reports roll in. Everyone here cannot believe this has happened. I have to go now, a family need to use this phone to check an old hotmail account they have. Please everyone take care and only use mail if you absolutely must. God bless us all.

― When a German communicates, you listen (LocalGarda), Saturday, September 24, 2011 8:13 AM

went out with a guy who works as a sound engineer a few weeks ago and went on about how he can't date people that don't work in creative fields, because they are not "self-actualized"...uhm, ok. i'm just trying to find someone to make out with, bud.

― bene_gesserit, Friday, November 4, 2011 4:16 PM

- copied loads of papers for a meeting with a credit bank tomorrow (yes, i'm the 99%, sadly, the past haunts me in the shape of a huge study debt)
- totally forged my work contract and house renting contract because i couldn't find the original copies anymore; had the perfect culprit too, my dad, who got way into it lol, pulling out letter paper from 8 years ago to print it on, creasing up the paper to make it look old, driving staples through it, smashing perforating holes through it "because it's been in your binder for years DO YOU SEE), suggesting to use a "low ink pen" for the signatures. great son-dad moment, been years...
- wine, bliss, sleep now

― Y Kant Lou Reed (Le Bateau Ivre),

btw apropos of nothing, I spent the weekend with my dad in Chicago who spent about 14 hours raving about how amazing MN apples have become

― sex-poodle Al Gore (DJP), Wednesday, November 9, 2011

honeycrisps are good its true

not as good as fujis tho

― ASPIE Rocky (dayo), Wednesday, November 9, 2011

and i can eat them guilt free! hooray for america!

xpost nah we got a whole new apple going on right now that i cant remember the name of, gala something maybe?

― cannonball aderall (jjjusten), Wednesday, November 9, 2011

sweet tango?

― cannonball aderall (jjjusten), Wednesday, November 9, 2011

I think it's SweeTango(TM), although based on how my dad was going on about them they should be called CrackOrgasm.

― sex-poodle Al Gore (DJP), Wednesday, November 9, 2011

this is pretty funny

all these ppl in here?

ja that

Dreamed last night that I smoked celery in a dorm room with 2 ILXors (one of whom I've met irl) and Miley Cyrus. I was like, "wtf, celery?" but they explained that it's just as strong as weed if you do it right. You put it in a glass Coke bottle with some fire inside and suck the smoke out through a straw.

Not feeling very rested this morning.

― WmC, Saturday, May 21, 2011

diet smoke

― ♪♫ hey there lamp post, feelin' whiney ♪♫ (darraghmac), Saturday, May 21, 201

i have a lot of affection for lapsed vegetarians because i feel like the period afterwards is always so grateful & enthusiastic. my friend started eating fish & it's like a whole freed prisoner thing, just constantly renewed wonder at how bright life can be. vegetarianism has its own stockholm syndrome thing, like you are condemned to spending time with mushrooms & slow-cooked onions but you learn to love those things as a result of your captivity.

― schlump, Tuesday, February 5, 2013 9:26 AM (22 minutes ago

when everyone was posting on the sandbox last year i hoped schlump would stick around after big ilx came back but then i never saw him here again.

i hoped that too! i said as much when i posted the above, but i deleted it before clicking submit. why i don't know.

it sounds like the sin of pride to my catholic-raised ears.

and that sounds like the sin of speaking too directly to my lutheran-raised ears.

your dainty lutheran-raised ears might not have liked the catholic volume and tone of my laugh when i read that.

sin of pride kicking in again: it pleases me to know i made you laugh.

why was lxy reading sandbox football threads imo

huh i can't find the original post that is strange

a cat may look at a king. xp

not sandbox is why you couldn't find it. http://www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?showall=true&bookmarkedmessageid=1699348&boardid=40&threadid=81232

i read it cuz i followed the world cup. did you ever see the video of the chart jergins and i made?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ECgk77qKyU&feature=player_embedded

vv commendable

wait can one steal from ilx like that

it's our big brother, of course one can!

think of it as a hand-me-down.

this appropriation of a set of words sounds to me like a bit of a lxycon

oh you goofy!

http://i.word.com/idictionary/hand-me-down

i was just trying to make a lxycon joke tbh

lol good, that's the best kind of joke. i just didn't want to presume.

tho jergins and i actually had a "maybe they use a different term there" conversation.

If youse're not gonna assume that i'm v v clever i shan't hang round

you've no call to worry

haha je55e -- this is getting off topic and maybe it's just me but i've always felt like home depot is kind of a cruising environment, it's basically a series of long hypermasculine alleyways populated by rugged dudes and you have to kind of lurk around near all this manly stuff, sometimes you stop and ask a guy a question then you end up following him down a darkened aisle. idk, maybe i just get confused by the signage out front for "contractor pickup" because i always think "yes, please."

― ⚓ (elmo argonaut), Thursday, June 6, 2013 5:19 AM

i was just daydreaming yesterday about how much i love to go to home depot or lowe's because i like to feel small and the high ceilings and high shelves with really big things on them are just the thing to make a tall lady feel small. also it smells great.

http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6236/6225360126_1722e4c837.jpg

mookie you are off the charts

I got confused by my mobile phone boarding pass and showed the flight security attendant an Instagram of a bee.

― Chuck_Tatum, Tuesday, September 30, 2014 4:54 AM (3 weeks ago)