parental news-giving etiquette

so i just emailed my folks to let them know 'oh btw i'm getting married and not moving back to nz'. should i have perhaps called them instead?

n.b. i have not received a reply, yet.

congratulations!

this might be a bit awkward, yeah.

i have been putting it off for some time... i mean, it's not like this is a decision we just made, we decided like a year ago. i just really hate talking to my parents most of the time, not for any huge reason (i'm pretty adverse to talking on the phone at all, actually). plus, i thought i'd probably cry (i'm a total baby, i admit it) whilst telling them.

also lol selfish reasons for telling them now: i needed to find out if it's ok for me to move in with them for a couple/few months when i go back to nz in july.

ha i think if i were to get married i would email them if i told them at all lol but just because i wouldn't want a big deal made of it and i'm weird about telling them things, and also it would be funny (to me only probably)

do you have to go back while waiting for new visa?

yeah i'm only here a 1yr work visa, got go back to apply for fiancee visa, then return to US, get married within 90 days and THEN apply for residency.

i think it's fine. it's probably how i'd tell them--at least my dad.

they probably knew anyway, right?

if they love someone they will set them free.

i would call my parents, but i guess it just depends on your relationship with your parents? also, do you think it would really not be ok with them if you lived there for a few months?

but yeah email would def be the easiest way to say it.

send an e-card

send an evite to the wedding

i don't think i would like to tell my parents i was having a kid so if i did i would just wait until they visited and noticed a child lived in my house, or maybe i'd email them a picture of it

be vague about where the child came from, hem and haw over what its name is. "we call it...sometimes. do u have name ideas?
"

oh that old thing, i've had it for ages.

well just received voicemail from mum (missed 3 calls): "just got your email, we knew all along where this was headed so no surprises and we're really rapt etc. etc." she sounded really happy and excited.

and also lol @ this thought i had: what if i invited a bunch of ilxors to our wedding and you all showed up and it was the first time i met you and had to introduce you to the family...

also: we just planned our wedding in about 15mins. done.

"just got your email, we knew all along where this was headed so no surprises and we're really rapt etc. etc." she sounded really happy and excited.

:)

:)

also if you invite ilxors to your wedding, you could just lie to your parents about how you know us. what better way to start off that phase of your life than by lying to your family?

at least i'll be legit.

i'm almost-legit

but almost doesn't count

between my accent and my legitimacy i should be in a position of advantage at this shindig.

introduce me as your cousin, that should smoove things

'cuzzy bro' is the correct term, and yes, i will do this gladly.

"cuzzy bro"? seriously?

it's not mandatory but cuzzy bro would add an authentic nz note to the charade.

i would be embarrassed if someone referred to me as their cuzzy bro

scuzzy broad

to be 100% honest i am not in the habit of calling people my cuzzy bros.

also if you invite ilxors to your wedding, you could just lie to your parents about how you know us. what better way to start off that phase of your life than by lying to your family?

― Lingbert, Friday, January 2, 2009 1:27 AM (11 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

i had to call a friend of mandee/homsexual II once for work and i mentioned that i knew mandee and he asked how and i wasnt sure if shed be embarrassed if i said the real answer so i said "oh you know... advertising... pr... we run in the same circles"

lol. gr8080 knows one of my college roommates and i'm not sure whether or not he told her how we know each other...

the funnest part about telling your family the truth is to tell it in a way that doesn't tell the truth at all.

"this is estela. we lived in the same house in wellington."

"please meet jergins and lxy and lingbert. we participated together in an international cultural exchange last summer."

etc.

"mutual acquaintances"

lol friend of a friend is my #1 go-to

at a bar with some people a couple weeks ago we did the "this is lingbert. he is the guy from the internet. that's how we met him." it led to lots of ooohs and ahhs and "you don't look like you'd be from the internet" type comments.

once i told a friend that i knew all these people she was meeting from the internet and she thought it was really neat, but i don't think most people feel that way. tbh, at this point i feel like there shouldn't be the stigma. my "bff" met her bf from a message borad and even my dad has message borad friends.

my girlfriend calls you guys "internets" as in "what are your internets doing for new years"

except for u t since shes met u actually

lol and grady for some reason

i wouldn't tell my school friends about people from the internet because they already make fun of me for things and think i'm weird but i don't think my real friends (ie the ones i like) care. my dad has msg borad friends to but i don't think of them being the same as my msg borad friends for some reason.

i imagine lingy looks like someone from the internet because he is someone from the internet

i imagine your dads being into trains

or something mechanical

yeah his board is about carpentry or houses or some crap (i will never look at it!) but lately he's been talking about a thread about israel/palestine and i cringe when i hear about it because those threads are always cringe-worthy and i wish he would realize that and not post on them or at least not talk about posting on them

my dad's borad is about his car. they have "meetups".

what kind of car like a dodge stratus or a ford taurus

or some other dad car

jk lol

midlife crisis car, obv!

can you imagine sitting your dad down and giving him the talk: "what you're doing is trolling. you can think as much shit as you want about domestic cars, but you don't need to say it."

my dad doesn't frequent internet forums, but there have been people who have talked shit on him online on forums that are related to his hobby.

i think my dad may indeed be a troll. he said someone called him a skinhead and the thread was locked lol

you guys are all invited to the wedding!! shit, my parents are totally cool with jordan so i doubt they'd have a problem with internet friends who are 'just friends' ;)

so i got to talk to my family and they are actually SUPER FREAKIN HAPPY. i told my mum the reason i didnt call was because i didn't want to burst into tears etc. and she said 'that would have made two of us!' lol

and when i said to my dad 'don't stress about making it over for the wedding cuz it's super expensive etc.' he said he'll do whatever it takes to be here, including selling the car!

my nana's response to the news: 'about time she settled down' lol

well hey great news, ruby!

is lxy short enough to pull off being flower girl?

yes, a+!

to both!

my dad doesn't frequent internet forums, but there have been people who have talked shit on him online on forums that are related to his hobby.

― Lingbert, Friday, January 2, 2009 11:05 PM (Yesterday)

what did he do to warrant their ire

he did much better than them

snap!

(dadbert, not ling zing amon)

'his hobby' conjures up an image of a splendid castle made out of toothpicks and plasticine.

people were trashing him online because his plasticine toothpick castle was much more splendid than theirs

their castles were small and crooked with big gobs of glue on them and their royal families had fucked up plasticine faces.

this brings back memories of when i fucked up my model of a pueblo indian dwelling in 5th grade.

thanks a lot.

if i could i would cheer you up by showing you my derelict little potato man that i made for the spring flower show.

every easter egg i ever dyed every christmas cookie i ever decorated

my recent theater design and planning final project.

HEY RUBY
i don't know if i'm supposed or if i need to say this because it's been an eventuality (in my mind) since i've known you but HEY CONGRATULATIONS

thank u! <3 <3 <3

it has pretty much been an eventuality for about the last year, but still it's nice to make a semi 'formal' announcement about it.

i am currently RING HUNTING!! i'm kinda embarrassed by the girly-ness of it, but hey.

look in the sand

potential ring:

http://www.titaniumrings.com/pix/etoiimg.jpg

it is TITANIUM!! got my heart set on a titanium ring. so this ring ^^ but with pale green amethyst/peridot/garnet.

will you have "LOL THANX INTERNET :D" engraved on your rings

YES!

(more like: 'L0L TH4NX 1NT3RN3T :D'