parental news-giving etiquette

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so i just emailed my folks to let them know 'oh btw i'm getting married and not moving back to nz'. should i have perhaps called them instead?

n.b. i have not received a reply, yet.

smoove operator, Friday, 2 January 2009 01:04 (fourteen years ago) link

congratulations!

this might be a bit awkward, yeah.

tehresa, Friday, 2 January 2009 01:12 (fourteen years ago) link

i have been putting it off for some time... i mean, it's not like this is a decision we just made, we decided like a year ago. i just really hate talking to my parents most of the time, not for any huge reason (i'm pretty adverse to talking on the phone at all, actually). plus, i thought i'd probably cry (i'm a total baby, i admit it) whilst telling them.

smoove operator, Friday, 2 January 2009 01:16 (fourteen years ago) link

also lol selfish reasons for telling them now: i needed to find out if it's ok for me to move in with them for a couple/few months when i go back to nz in july.

smoove operator, Friday, 2 January 2009 01:18 (fourteen years ago) link

ha i think if i were to get married i would email them if i told them at all lol but just because i wouldn't want a big deal made of it and i'm weird about telling them things, and also it would be funny (to me only probably)

do you have to go back while waiting for new visa?

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 01:23 (fourteen years ago) link

yeah i'm only here a 1yr work visa, got go back to apply for fiancee visa, then return to US, get married within 90 days and THEN apply for residency.

smoove operator, Friday, 2 January 2009 02:19 (fourteen years ago) link

i think it's fine. it's probably how i'd tell them--at least my dad.

they probably knew anyway, right?

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 03:19 (fourteen years ago) link

if they love someone they will set them free.

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 03:19 (fourteen years ago) link

i would call my parents, but i guess it just depends on your relationship with your parents? also, do you think it would really not be ok with them if you lived there for a few months?

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 05:00 (fourteen years ago) link

but yeah email would def be the easiest way to say it.

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 05:01 (fourteen years ago) link

send an e-card

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 05:08 (fourteen years ago) link

send an evite to the wedding

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 05:12 (fourteen years ago) link

i don't think i would like to tell my parents i was having a kid so if i did i would just wait until they visited and noticed a child lived in my house, or maybe i'd email them a picture of it

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 05:17 (fourteen years ago) link

be vague about where the child came from, hem and haw over what its name is. "we call it...sometimes. do u have name ideas?
"

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 05:21 (fourteen years ago) link

oh that old thing, i've had it for ages.

estela, Friday, 2 January 2009 05:33 (fourteen years ago) link

well just received voicemail from mum (missed 3 calls): "just got your email, we knew all along where this was headed so no surprises and we're really rapt etc. etc." she sounded really happy and excited.

and also lol @ this thought i had: what if i invited a bunch of ilxors to our wedding and you all showed up and it was the first time i met you and had to introduce you to the family...

also: we just planned our wedding in about 15mins. done.

smoove operator, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:04 (fourteen years ago) link

"just got your email, we knew all along where this was headed so no surprises and we're really rapt etc. etc." she sounded really happy and excited.

:)

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:22 (fourteen years ago) link

:)

estela, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:23 (fourteen years ago) link

also if you invite ilxors to your wedding, you could just lie to your parents about how you know us. what better way to start off that phase of your life than by lying to your family?

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:27 (fourteen years ago) link

at least i'll be legit.

estela, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:31 (fourteen years ago) link

i'm almost-legit

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:33 (fourteen years ago) link

but almost doesn't count

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:33 (fourteen years ago) link

between my accent and my legitimacy i should be in a position of advantage at this shindig.

estela, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:41 (fourteen years ago) link

introduce me as your cousin, that should smoove things

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:49 (fourteen years ago) link

'cuzzy bro' is the correct term, and yes, i will do this gladly.

estela, Friday, 2 January 2009 06:59 (fourteen years ago) link

"cuzzy bro"? seriously?

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 07:06 (fourteen years ago) link

it's not mandatory but cuzzy bro would add an authentic nz note to the charade.

estela, Friday, 2 January 2009 07:48 (fourteen years ago) link

i would be embarrassed if someone referred to me as their cuzzy bro

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 08:20 (fourteen years ago) link

scuzzy broad

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 08:45 (fourteen years ago) link

to be 100% honest i am not in the habit of calling people my cuzzy bros.

estela, Friday, 2 January 2009 09:10 (fourteen years ago) link

also if you invite ilxors to your wedding, you could just lie to your parents about how you know us. what better way to start off that phase of your life than by lying to your family?

― Lingbert, Friday, January 2, 2009 1:27 AM (11 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

i had to call a friend of mandee/homsexual II once for work and i mentioned that i knew mandee and he asked how and i wasnt sure if shed be embarrassed if i said the real answer so i said "oh you know... advertising... pr... we run in the same circles"

max max max max, Friday, 2 January 2009 18:15 (fourteen years ago) link

lol. gr8080 knows one of my college roommates and i'm not sure whether or not he told her how we know each other...

tehresa, Friday, 2 January 2009 18:18 (fourteen years ago) link

the funnest part about telling your family the truth is to tell it in a way that doesn't tell the truth at all.

"this is estela. we lived in the same house in wellington."

"please meet jergins and lxy and lingbert. we participated together in an international cultural exchange last summer."

etc.

lxy, Friday, 2 January 2009 19:28 (fourteen years ago) link

"mutual acquaintances"

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 19:46 (fourteen years ago) link

lol friend of a friend is my #1 go-to

tehresa, Friday, 2 January 2009 20:05 (fourteen years ago) link

at a bar with some people a couple weeks ago we did the "this is lingbert. he is the guy from the internet. that's how we met him." it led to lots of ooohs and ahhs and "you don't look like you'd be from the internet" type comments.

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 20:43 (fourteen years ago) link

once i told a friend that i knew all these people she was meeting from the internet and she thought it was really neat, but i don't think most people feel that way. tbh, at this point i feel like there shouldn't be the stigma. my "bff" met her bf from a message borad and even my dad has message borad friends.

tehresa, Friday, 2 January 2009 21:11 (fourteen years ago) link

my girlfriend calls you guys "internets" as in "what are your internets doing for new years"

max max max max, Friday, 2 January 2009 21:24 (fourteen years ago) link

except for u t since shes met u actually

max max max max, Friday, 2 January 2009 21:24 (fourteen years ago) link

lol and grady for some reason

max max max max, Friday, 2 January 2009 21:24 (fourteen years ago) link

i wouldn't tell my school friends about people from the internet because they already make fun of me for things and think i'm weird but i don't think my real friends (ie the ones i like) care. my dad has msg borad friends to but i don't think of them being the same as my msg borad friends for some reason.

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 21:28 (fourteen years ago) link

i imagine lingy looks like someone from the internet because he is someone from the internet

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 21:28 (fourteen years ago) link

i imagine your dads being into trains

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:01 (fourteen years ago) link

or something mechanical

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:03 (fourteen years ago) link

yeah his board is about carpentry or houses or some crap (i will never look at it!) but lately he's been talking about a thread about israel/palestine and i cringe when i hear about it because those threads are always cringe-worthy and i wish he would realize that and not post on them or at least not talk about posting on them

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:06 (fourteen years ago) link

my dad's borad is about his car. they have "meetups".

tehresa, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:10 (fourteen years ago) link

what kind of car like a dodge stratus or a ford taurus

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:14 (fourteen years ago) link

or some other dad car

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:14 (fourteen years ago) link

jk lol

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:14 (fourteen years ago) link

midlife crisis car, obv!

tehresa, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:16 (fourteen years ago) link

can you imagine sitting your dad down and giving him the talk: "what you're doing is trolling. you can think as much shit as you want about domestic cars, but you don't need to say it."

jergins, Friday, 2 January 2009 22:59 (fourteen years ago) link

my dad doesn't frequent internet forums, but there have been people who have talked shit on him online on forums that are related to his hobby.

Lingbert, Friday, 2 January 2009 23:05 (fourteen years ago) link

i think my dad may indeed be a troll. he said someone called him a skinhead and the thread was locked lol

harbl, Friday, 2 January 2009 23:13 (fourteen years ago) link

you guys are all invited to the wedding!! shit, my parents are totally cool with jordan so i doubt they'd have a problem with internet friends who are 'just friends' ;)

so i got to talk to my family and they are actually SUPER FREAKIN HAPPY. i told my mum the reason i didnt call was because i didn't want to burst into tears etc. and she said 'that would have made two of us!' lol

and when i said to my dad 'don't stress about making it over for the wedding cuz it's super expensive etc.' he said he'll do whatever it takes to be here, including selling the car!

my nana's response to the news: 'about time she settled down' lol

smoove operator, Saturday, 3 January 2009 04:23 (fourteen years ago) link

well hey great news, ruby!

lxy, Saturday, 3 January 2009 04:43 (fourteen years ago) link

is lxy short enough to pull off being flower girl?

jergins, Saturday, 3 January 2009 04:50 (fourteen years ago) link

yes, a+!

tehresa, Saturday, 3 January 2009 04:50 (fourteen years ago) link

to both!

tehresa, Saturday, 3 January 2009 04:50 (fourteen years ago) link

my dad doesn't frequent internet forums, but there have been people who have talked shit on him online on forums that are related to his hobby.

― Lingbert, Friday, January 2, 2009 11:05 PM (Yesterday)

what did he do to warrant their ire

amon, Saturday, 3 January 2009 06:46 (fourteen years ago) link

he did much better than them

Lingbert, Saturday, 3 January 2009 07:02 (fourteen years ago) link

snap!

tehresa, Saturday, 3 January 2009 07:03 (fourteen years ago) link

(dadbert, not ling zing amon)

tehresa, Saturday, 3 January 2009 07:04 (fourteen years ago) link

'his hobby' conjures up an image of a splendid castle made out of toothpicks and plasticine.

estela, Saturday, 3 January 2009 07:17 (fourteen years ago) link

people were trashing him online because his plasticine toothpick castle was much more splendid than theirs

Lingbert, Saturday, 3 January 2009 07:21 (fourteen years ago) link

their castles were small and crooked with big gobs of glue on them and their royal families had fucked up plasticine faces.

estela, Saturday, 3 January 2009 07:34 (fourteen years ago) link

this brings back memories of when i fucked up my model of a pueblo indian dwelling in 5th grade.

thanks a lot.

tehresa, Saturday, 3 January 2009 07:36 (fourteen years ago) link

if i could i would cheer you up by showing you my derelict little potato man that i made for the spring flower show.

estela, Saturday, 3 January 2009 07:41 (fourteen years ago) link

every easter egg i ever dyed every christmas cookie i ever decorated

lxy, Saturday, 3 January 2009 18:36 (fourteen years ago) link

my recent theater design and planning final project.

tehresa, Saturday, 3 January 2009 18:44 (fourteen years ago) link

HEY RUBY
i don't know if i'm supposed or if i need to say this because it's been an eventuality (in my mind) since i've known you but HEY CONGRATULATIONS

jergins, Sunday, 4 January 2009 01:54 (fourteen years ago) link

thank u! <3 <3 <3

it has pretty much been an eventuality for about the last year, but still it's nice to make a semi 'formal' announcement about it.

i am currently RING HUNTING!! i'm kinda embarrassed by the girly-ness of it, but hey.

smoove operator, Sunday, 4 January 2009 03:21 (fourteen years ago) link

look in the sand

jergins, Sunday, 4 January 2009 03:28 (fourteen years ago) link

potential ring:

http://www.titaniumrings.com/pix/etoiimg.jpg

it is TITANIUM!! got my heart set on a titanium ring. so this ring ^^ but with pale green amethyst/peridot/garnet.

smoove operator, Sunday, 4 January 2009 06:22 (fourteen years ago) link

will you have "LOL THANX INTERNET :D" engraved on your rings

Lingbert, Sunday, 4 January 2009 07:11 (fourteen years ago) link

YES!

(more like: 'L0L TH4NX 1NT3RN3T :D'

smoove operator, Thursday, 8 January 2009 16:16 (fourteen years ago) link


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