holiday parental i.t. dept, reporting for duty

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-running 2-3 different spyware/virus removers -- check
-clearing out all the crap my father somehow acquired from poker and/or porn sites -- check
-reinstalling video drivers so my folks can play with Google Earth again -- in progress
-number of times reminding father to follow anti-spyware steps -- 5 so far

kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Saturday, 23 December 2006 05:35 (fourteen years ago) link

i'm definitely going to be running spyware/virus removers at my mom's. are there other worthwhile free ones beside ad-aware?

Lingbert (Lingbert), Saturday, 23 December 2006 05:38 (fourteen years ago) link

Ewido is the best one i've seen.

kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Saturday, 23 December 2006 05:40 (fourteen years ago) link

you think in the 80s, dads would fuck up the VCR wathcing pr0n and make their kids fix it for them?

vahid (vahid), Saturday, 23 December 2006 05:52 (fourteen years ago) link

this is what i'm doing all day tomorrow.

baby wizard sex (gbx), Saturday, 23 December 2006 06:04 (fourteen years ago) link

you think in the 80s, dads would fuck up the VCR wathcing pr0n and make their kids fix it for them?

in junior high i got a playboy playmates tug of war and three legged race tape stuck in my mom's vcr. she had to return the vcr to the store. the tape was red.

jergins (jergins), Saturday, 23 December 2006 06:53 (fourteen years ago) link

pwned

baby wizard sex (gbx), Saturday, 23 December 2006 07:01 (fourteen years ago) link

i was the only one who knew how to program the vcr, tho my dad learned how to hook up the coax cables

kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Saturday, 23 December 2006 07:02 (fourteen years ago) link

am also teaching dad about torrents.

currently downloading: 1st season of Keeping Up Appearances(i.e. the show only your parents watch)

kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Saturday, 23 December 2006 07:11 (fourteen years ago) link

my dadz has some ridiculous wireless lockdown going on which requires not just password but my machine id being put into the router as well? my sister's fiance said he took like an hour to set theirs up (cause he pretends he knows computery stuff but really doesn't) so when he offered to do mine, i was like, 'uh that's ok. i found some neighbor's unlocked wifi'

tehresa (tehresa), Saturday, 23 December 2006 07:47 (fourteen years ago) link

how to ignore my repeated suggestions to use firefox and run 6 different instances of internets explorer instead because "i dunno, i'm used to it"

also my dad posts on "fine homebuilding" message board! so cuet

caitlin oh no (harbl), Saturday, 23 December 2006 14:39 (fourteen years ago) link

finally got my dad onto firefox last spring.

my dad posts on a message board for his midlife crisis car! they even have faps!

tehresa (tehresa), Saturday, 23 December 2006 15:34 (fourteen years ago) link

my mom is on like 8 corgi listservs. she's started sending me flash animations that are a litle bit close to precious moments. finally mom i old and sappy

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 16:36 (fourteen years ago) link

i totally had to uninstall and reinstall half of my mother's programs over thanksgiving. i dunno how she fucked it up so badly!!

violent j (sandboxhulkington), Saturday, 23 December 2006 17:08 (fourteen years ago) link

my dad is my IT dept

nuneb (nuneb), Saturday, 23 December 2006 17:58 (fourteen years ago) link

they even have faps!

hahaha

kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:08 (fourteen years ago) link

I WISH someone would do that shit for my parents, I'm not qualified and they always have some virus or etc fucking things up and then they get all suspicious of the wrong things, for instance, they blame it on leaving the computer on OVERNIGHT. Because uhh people who have something to hide are more active at night...? So they seem to think. Dudes, this is the interweb, they're probably in RUSSIA.

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:18 (fourteen years ago) link

I did install Firefox but we'll see if they use it -- Mom prefers IE AARRRGHBHLGLHGLHL.

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:19 (fourteen years ago) link

Maybe you need to get a BOYFRIEND and bring him home to mom and dad

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:24 (fourteen years ago) link

Boyfriends are my sister's job, and she married a brilliant mechanic so we can't complain. I take no responsibility for adding to the family skill set/gene pool.

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:33 (fourteen years ago) link

(Mostly because my preference is for a discerning editorial sensibility, which is unlikely to benefit the extended fam.)

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:37 (fourteen years ago) link

Speaking of tech support, I have a question: I'm trying to order post-Christmas pres from www.flight001.com and parents' computer won't load it. They have Norton auto-protect and some spyware thing that blocks cookies -- what the hell is the problem?

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:49 (fourteen years ago) link

Norton may be the problem!

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:54 (fourteen years ago) link

Laurel, maybe you should branch out and try meeting new kinds of people I'm not saying techdorks are the way to go, but perhaps you're overly specific.

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:54 (fourteen years ago) link

I guess I'm related to the Aldens...

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 19:56 (fourteen years ago) link

Dad says certain amount of firewall capability built into cable modem hardware -- could that be the problem? Turning off Norton does not help.

JW: Last attempt at branching out was disastrous! No more boys in bands/without dayjobs/un-cerebral types ever.

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:00 (fourteen years ago) link

haha, i am totally the tech support christmastime person for my mom + her husband and my brother (other brother doesn't even have his own computer, doesn't care.) i am staying here though this time around! so no crazy full afternoon of wtf?? and them hanging over me and touching screen and etc (it's faster if you leave me alone, and don't touch the screen) until i snap. and the job gets done. and then my mom makes me a hot toddy and we fire up the vaporizer yaay

i kind of worry about the state of the computer this year but it's a mac now (an older one) so might not be such an issue as in the PC years (haha okay, i'm kidding myself on that one right?) and they're still on dial-up.

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:08 (fourteen years ago) link

xpost - i feel for you, laurlz and the firewall/router/who-knows tech issue...

i have lost track of what my 'type' is

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:11 (fourteen years ago) link

Laurel there's all kinds of awesome cerebral people in the world. Where do we meet them though? I'm getting a little sick of people who fancy themselves "creative" though.

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:15 (fourteen years ago) link

I don't know...? I have a feeling 30+ SMRT E. PANTS are not having beerz at the Ward on Mondays. Also DO NOT WANT: thespians (ie holiday party I went to last Sunday).

Also, Dad frowned on me for DLing Firefox because he says whenever the kids come home, by the time we leave their computer has "viruses" (ie any mal/function they don't understand).

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:24 (fourteen years ago) link

Also DO NOT WANT: thespians

^ OTM

Its not like anyone is really pulling from people they meet at WW....

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:30 (fourteen years ago) link

If I was gay I would totally be your non-threatening wingmang, Laurelz :(

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:31 (fourteen years ago) link

No no, but all my social life is basically friends of friends and there's no qualifying pool in useful age range. ANYWAY BACK TO OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED PARENT SUPPORT.

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:34 (fourteen years ago) link

solution = "business networking"

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:35 (fourteen years ago) link

Robyn, I'm not sure how you have any family stresses when the tie that binds you together is firing up the vape! Kind of awestruck.

XP: In publishing? Maybe if I'm looking for a gay wingman....

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:36 (fourteen years ago) link

Laurel, I think finding a gay wingman is a good idea. Perhaps we can have an Oceans 11 (on TNT last night) style plot to find you love? :D

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:37 (fourteen years ago) link

I haf never seen movie but could be amusing...? There's no shame once you've done noive dot com.

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:40 (fourteen years ago) link

e.o was a noive featured profile </jaymc>

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:45 (fourteen years ago) link

http://www.webwombat.com.au/entertainment/movies/images/oceans.JPG

commence Operation Gay Wingman in 5, 4 ....

dmr (dmr), Saturday, 23 December 2006 20:57 (fourteen years ago) link

ohman, see the thing is that i totally love my family but we all have this kind of highly-strung-with-appearance-of-pretty-relaxed thing about us, and when you combine us all, it can be too much (as witnessed btwn me and bro in nyc). but at least we are aware! and hence the vap. srsly, i just was on the phone with momz for gingerbread recipe and now feel like i need bong hit. i guess it's also this time of year.
xpost

oh, and haha, my mom just told me that because my youngest bro is having some bad kidney problems (ok, not the haha part), the doc gave him a bunch of demerol! demerol christmas! ah, but not for me...

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Saturday, 23 December 2006 21:00 (fourteen years ago) link

god i wish i could chill my family the fuck out with some smoking!

tehresa (tehresa), Saturday, 23 December 2006 21:07 (fourteen years ago) link

it's better than booze! (though booze, minor level, is good too)

xpost to laurel - yeah, i would think that if you're looking for a gay wingman, that working in publishing is pretty ideal! i have never really had a gay friend designated as 'wingman' though and i really don't know how i feel about the idea of that or 'wingman' in the first place

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Saturday, 23 December 2006 21:27 (fourteen years ago) link

No, no Best Gay Friend/s is/are in Noo Hampster and cannot be replaced; let's not be ridiculous.

My family drinks together now! My mother is a little afraid she's turning into "a lush" but it only takes equiv of 1 drink to put her away so it's a moot point.

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 21:42 (fourteen years ago) link

aw, momz :)

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Saturday, 23 December 2006 21:46 (fourteen years ago) link

fights with family so far: 2

jw (ex machina), Saturday, 23 December 2006 22:00 (fourteen years ago) link

fights with dad so far: 3

remy bean (bean), Saturday, 23 December 2006 22:00 (fourteen years ago) link

dad: why don't you come help cook?
me: i cooked dinner the last three nights, lunch yesterday, the pies and made ketchup and mustard and relish already today, and i'm not hungry anyhow. make your own.
him: why are you always so grumpy?
me: i'm not grumpy. stop bothering me.
mom: cut it out, both of you.
him: tell him to stop.
me: what the hell?
mom: don't swear.
him: i thought you were some big cook now.
me: stop being a jerk!
him: i'm not the jerk around here.
me: i'm gonna go read somewhere else.
mom: so you're not gonna cook for us?

remy bean (bean), Saturday, 23 December 2006 22:03 (fourteen years ago) link

EEEP! Fights here so far = zero, but my sister wont' get here 'til after dinner. Countdown begins: 10 9 8 7...

Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 23 December 2006 22:10 (fourteen years ago) link

my sister's abroad now, so all the irritability's transferred to me.

the strict marm i remember from my teenaged years is gone and there's a nice old mother living in my house. also it makes me sad that my dad is definitely not a middle-aged guy any more, that he's crossed often into ornery oldish guy years.

remy bean (bean), Saturday, 23 December 2006 22:16 (fourteen years ago) link

i am awesomely drunk and stoned!
i made rice stuffing! for tomorrow
and convinced grumpy friend (who will cheer up) to come for dinner!
now i have to bake more cookies! here are "gingerbread men":
hahaomg
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/130/332350434_87e6aeb14a.jpg

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/138/332350438_9eeacb0d1e.jpg
they turned into triangles, squares
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/154/332350433_2a55889dc7_m.jpg

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Monday, 25 December 2006 03:17 (fourteen years ago) link

rrrobyn with cookie sheet is cuetest noize holiday photo yet!

ian (orion), Monday, 25 December 2006 03:18 (fourteen years ago) link

i like the one with the semi-amputated arm

we twa hae run aboot the braes (get bent), Monday, 25 December 2006 03:19 (fourteen years ago) link

i got them all to sit down and try out my "Ticket to Ride" boardgame. They enjoyed it. Whee. Mom is practicing piano in next room, sister is downstairs watching tube, dad is in bedroom watching foxnews, brother is still in michigan w/ wife and newborn spawnling.

another classic christmas.

kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Monday, 25 December 2006 03:55 (fourteen years ago) link

omg i am almost finally done the cookies
i ran out of jameson and moved on to the last 2 inches of vodka in a bottle i forgot i even had (i am not such a drinker, obv)
shocking = me not burning down bldng!

i am finding this hilarious:
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/137/332404708_24f9dac339.jpg

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Monday, 25 December 2006 04:42 (fourteen years ago) link

don't worry, i made frosting!
they taste good, really, really good

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Monday, 25 December 2006 04:44 (fourteen years ago) link

ok i haven't really made the frosting yet
and i could only eat two
but still

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Monday, 25 December 2006 04:50 (fourteen years ago) link

Someone has to say it: I WD EAT ALL THIS COOOOOKIES

Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 25 December 2006 06:40 (fourteen years ago) link

my momz made these gingerbread things w/ m&m eyes and pretzel antlers and they are looking like reindeers. lol.

tehresa (tehresa), Monday, 25 December 2006 06:51 (fourteen years ago) link

your mom sounds RAD

jw (ex machina), Monday, 25 December 2006 06:55 (fourteen years ago) link

and HOT

chaki (chaki), Monday, 25 December 2006 07:03 (fourteen years ago) link

take her, dude

we twa hae run aboot the braes (get bent), Monday, 25 December 2006 07:12 (fourteen years ago) link

her cockfucking made you

baccarat heads spice pushka underdog official texas holdem bundgee (bundgee), Monday, 25 December 2006 07:51 (fourteen years ago) link

omg haha

merry christmas dudez!

momz r funny too:
Dear Robyn:
I hear that my daughter is up baking cookies in an altered consciousness. Do be careful with all that, my sweet.

which is funny for many reasons but partly b/c look who's talking, mom. (also, next time i see my brother he is getting a punch for passing on that info.)

i frosted the cookies this morning! in neon colours! (b/c i bought neon food colouring - why get regular when there is neon??) but frosting is maybe the most frustrating substance in the universe, sent from the planet frustror to make me hate cookies. but whatever, not only do my cookies taste good but they're like a tribute to new wave + sofia coppola's marie antoinette.

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Monday, 25 December 2006 15:38 (fourteen years ago) link

frosted pics, plz. thx.

:)

lxy (lxy), Monday, 25 December 2006 15:58 (fourteen years ago) link

i'm sorry i called my dad an idiot ok, he just can't use technology

caitlin oh no (harbl), Monday, 25 December 2006 16:08 (fourteen years ago) link

her cockfucking made you

roffle

amon (amon), Monday, 25 December 2006 16:17 (fourteen years ago) link

omg neon cookies sounds incredible, rrobs!

tehresa (tehresa), Monday, 25 December 2006 17:37 (fourteen years ago) link

that is modern art, my friend

we twa hae run aboot the braes (get bent), Tuesday, 26 December 2006 07:01 (fourteen years ago) link

DELICIOUS.

ian (orion), Tuesday, 26 December 2006 07:01 (fourteen years ago) link

they look brilliant... thx for posting them.

lxy (lxy), Tuesday, 26 December 2006 16:04 (fourteen years ago) link

omg
nice color palette

v (sleep), Tuesday, 26 December 2006 17:09 (fourteen years ago) link

Me, teaching moms how to use a dvd player at her friend's house.

Mom: Ooh, this one says it has interactive menus.
Me: They all do, mom.
*after a crazy few minutes, gets "Animusic" dvd going, cgi robots play corny casio beats
Mom: How do they build those machines and then get them to play music?! Isn't that amazing?
Me: Mommmmmm, they're not real! It was all done WITH COMPUTERS.

JordanC (JordanC), Tuesday, 26 December 2006 17:23 (fourteen years ago) link

time to fix the printer

http://cache.consumerist.com/consumer/images/vale_obit.jpg

amon (amon), Tuesday, 26 December 2006 17:29 (fourteen years ago) link

Off to parents' for 3rd Christmas meal + adding RAM to G4, possible reformat + reinstall.

Joe Isuzu's Petals (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 26 December 2006 17:36 (fourteen years ago) link

ancient nvidia card still acting up. Might be able to fix this before I leave tomorrow.

also, finally interviewed my grandpa on tape today. Turns out he was in the Battles of Midway and Coral Seas, which I never knew. Whenever he'd promoted to Electrician 2rd Class, he would inevitably do something dumb and get demoted again. Something dumb would usually involve drunken adventures while ashore at Perth or various other ports in western australia. He described the members of the Royal Navy and Royal Australian Navy as "good guys." The only black sailor aboard his sub was usually a mess boy.

And I just got a call that my flight tomorrow to the cincinnati hub has been canceled. Great.

kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Wednesday, 27 December 2006 03:43 (fourteen years ago) link

xplaining to my dad why i couldnt just rip the remaining episodes of 24 season 3 to my laptop and watch them on the bus made me understand why my mother just isnt allowed in the kitchen.

how happy am i that my brother is the one still there when my mother decides to try and make her ipod work (esp given that she still cant sort out how her cellphone works)? very..

bb (bbia), Wednesday, 27 December 2006 15:39 (fourteen years ago) link

lol @ stealing neighbor's linksys! itunes shows "3r1k huf's kickass jammin' tunes'

i dunno who this person is but he has a lot of eno!

tehresa (tehresa), Wednesday, 27 December 2006 17:44 (fourteen years ago) link

also found: james blunt

LOL

tehresa (tehresa), Wednesday, 27 December 2006 17:46 (fourteen years ago) link

X-Mas is now @ my sister's house, & she married into IT, so it's all good. However, if I ever go to moms, I'll be sunk, as I'll be providing both IT support (cf. convo where I tell her to DITCH THE DIALUP because AOL is ballz) & remediation services (cf. me spending a day @ moms pre-XMas back in the day breaking down boxes & taking out trash like I'm @ Roy Rogers because SHE DONT CLEAN). [more pointed anti-moms comments preemptively redacted so chaki won't get all up in my business]

David RER (Frank Fiore), Wednesday, 27 December 2006 18:09 (fourteen years ago) link

i'm gonna have to hi and upgrade yr RAM when i get back to my momz house.

baby wizard sex (gbx), Wednesday, 27 December 2006 18:16 (fourteen years ago) link

had to talk moms down from iTunes gift card panic, synced and charged all four of her iPods (4! - video, photo, 2x black nanos - one for work, one for walking). Found her a nice selection of Avril, Kelly Clarkson, Natalie Merchant, Dido, Eve and TLC, steered her away from the Nickelback & Three Doors Down she usually listens to.

milo (milo), Thursday, 28 December 2006 06:29 (fourteen years ago) link

two years pass...

i reinstalled itunes
now i'm backing up a harddrive
this is a hell of a vacation

buttimore (jergins), Thursday, 25 June 2009 20:57 (eleven years ago) link

who loves to RESTART? i guess me

buttimore (jergins), Thursday, 25 June 2009 20:58 (eleven years ago) link

The lady gave birth to you and made you pancakes and this is the thanks she gets? Sheesh!

tehersa (tehresa), Thursday, 25 June 2009 21:25 (eleven years ago) link

I am deleting lots of really old backups. It is taking many hours. Still more than 300k files left.

tehersa (tehresa), Saturday, 27 June 2009 04:02 (eleven years ago) link

two years pass...

*this* is the app store, it's where you get apps. app is short for application

eboue I, Sunday, 25 December 2011 05:46 (nine years ago) link

Drove 25 miles roundtrip to the parents' house to hold the power button down on their tv for five seconds.

William (C), Sunday, 25 December 2011 21:17 (nine years ago) link

Parent's purchase of a new laptop earlier this year has surprisingly reduced the amount of IT support I'm called upon to do.

More hoes than Alan Titchmarsh. Yes folks, it's the s-dog, AKA (snoball), Sunday, 25 December 2011 21:54 (nine years ago) link

signed mom up for fb

river wolf, Monday, 26 December 2011 15:33 (nine years ago) link

-dad, by far the most computer illiterate person in my family, has surprisingly become pretty deft w/ an ipad

nice catch cuauhtemoc blanco niño (dayo), Monday, 26 December 2011 16:29 (nine years ago) link

-showed parents where the disc goes in their new blu-ray player.

-helped dad figure out how to turn on and put treats in cat toy ball.

a pretty low impact christmas for the parental i.t. dept.

sarahel, Monday, 26 December 2011 18:02 (nine years ago) link

- told Dad that if people ring him from India saying they're from Microsoft and can tell his computer has errors again he should just hang up and not run anything they ask him to

- he complained abt old software not running in Win7 and I nearly volunteered myself to try compatibility mode, but decided it would take too long, so I just said "mm, how annoying" and went home instead

will probably just email instructions about compatibility mode instead, so I don't have to hear an hour-long story about what he wanted to use the software for before he tells me what it is (and then spends another hour looking for the installation CD)

brony island baby (case spudette), Monday, 26 December 2011 18:13 (nine years ago) link

signed mom up for fb

― river wolf, Monday, December 26, 2011 9:33 AM (3 hours ago) Bookmark

just had 20 min phonecall about how to work facebook

river wolf, Monday, 26 December 2011 19:33 (nine years ago) link

No computer fixing necessary this time but did have to explain to family and friends what blogs are, why twitter and facebook both exist, and why anyone would use such worthless heinous services.

ledge, Monday, 26 December 2011 22:09 (nine years ago) link

Likewise - didn't need to tech support but did give a detailed description of how to set up a Twitter account, follow people, how to RT, what the social graph looks like from a graph-theoretical perspective, what hashtags are...Dad was very interested in all this though we both know full well he will never even visit twitter.com.

sean doily, Monday, 26 December 2011 22:14 (nine years ago) link

• reset mom's wifi password since she couldn't remember it and had been running her iPhone on 3G for 10 months.

• the tv's sound system was "hissy" because the actual television's volume was jacked to the top, but the stereo was plugged directly into the cable box. Fixed by turning the volume down.

clay, Monday, 26 December 2011 22:25 (nine years ago) link

I'm thankful that neither of my parents has shown any interest in social networking sites.

More hoes than Alan Titchmarsh. Yes folks, it's the s-dog, AKA (snoball), Monday, 26 December 2011 22:51 (nine years ago) link


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