Roger Friedman has some things to say:
Indeed, "Apocalypto" is the most violent movie Disney has ever released, with so much blood spurting out of orifices that even Martin Scorsese would blush.
If you've ever wondered what it would be like to see heads and hearts removed without anesthesia, then this is the movie for you.
...
"Apocalypto" really is a video game, a sort of "Survivor" set in what would become the Mayan ruins as we know them today.
The action is often cartoonish, and the dialogue â which is all spoken in some ancient dialect with subtitles â is often preposterous.
In one scene, after what seems like the umpteenth bloody killing, one Mayan quips to another and the translation is, "He's fâ-ed."
...
Semler's production is so shiny and perfect that his Mayans sometimes seem like they're in a Coca-Cola commercial. Instead of the dusty world of "Dances with Wolves," we get the high sheen of Kodak prints.
Sometimes, the result of this is a vivid portrait of death. For example, a jaguar eats a man's head, and masticates. Half-dressed Mayans are shot through the head, heart and chest with arrows and knifed sometimes without notice and almost always in the most gruesome ways possible. Heads roll and bounce, for real, down the long stairs of the Kukulcan Pyramid, or what we now regard the centerpiece of the Mayan ruins.
Blood doom death...APOCALYPTO!
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 1 December 2006 16:52 (seventeen years ago) link
although i probably won't see it until tv stumbling upon on some night i am really enjoying the title - so much so that i just went looking for an official tshirt (to no avail).
APOCALYPTO!
― jhoshea (jhoshea), Friday, 1 December 2006 17:19 (seventeen years ago) link
sixty year old native hawaiian dude i work with after a conversation regarding Nostradamus VS. Mayans when it comes to predicting the end of the world (paraphrased):
"You see dat Mel Gibson Apocalypto movie coming out? They say the mayans were the smartest and most advanced people evah? Yeah, they so smart, why they run around naked with things stuck in thier noses? Have some more tequila Mel!"
― grady (grady), Friday, 1 December 2006 19:36 (seventeen years ago) link
Eeep, I didn't? I added a trakky from Australia, with a panda bear for a logo, who plays a lot of Oblivion. Surely there aren't two?
― melton mowbray (melton), Friday, 15 December 2006 11:14 (seventeen years ago) link
Anybody see the SNL ad for
Apocalypto, where they replaced the subtitles with things like "Run, it's the Jews!"
― Nu-Edward III (edward iii), Friday, 15 December 2006 14:38 (seventeen years ago) link