KIM JONG IL might be dead (?)

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http://english.yonhapnews.co.kr/northkorea/2011/12/19/0401000000AEN20111219004700315.HTML

2011/12/19 12:10 KST

(URGENT) N. Korean leader died of fatigue at 8:30 a.m. Dec. 17 during train ride: KCNA

Johnny Fever, Monday, 19 December 2011 03:25 (twelve years ago) link

Seems so:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-16239693

Illia Rump (emil.y), Monday, 19 December 2011 03:26 (twelve years ago) link

Apparently, this kid is now running shit.

http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02085/kim-Jong-Un_2085223b.jpg

Johnny Fever, Monday, 19 December 2011 03:37 (twelve years ago) link

2011 being all "hey you thought i was all out of huge news stories, DIDNTCHA?"

m. yeux, Monday, 19 December 2011 03:37 (twelve years ago) link

any word on obama involvement

bloating forecast: ruff swells (p much resigned to deems), Monday, 19 December 2011 03:38 (twelve years ago) link

Wait so usually whenever someone is hospitalized for "fatigue" it means "Drugs/alcohol". Truly he was the supreme leader of Courvoisier and possibly also some other substances.

C-L, Monday, 19 December 2011 03:38 (twelve years ago) link

i don't think 'usually' applies to (i) n korea (ii) ex supreme leaders tbf

bloating forecast: ruff swells (p much resigned to deems), Monday, 19 December 2011 03:40 (twelve years ago) link

OCCUPY PYONGYANG

Johnny Fever, Monday, 19 December 2011 03:42 (twelve years ago) link

...and we have a new Dead Pool leader.

jaymc, Monday, 19 December 2011 03:44 (twelve years ago) link

supreme dead pool leader, if you please

bloating forecast: ruff swells (p much resigned to deems), Monday, 19 December 2011 03:49 (twelve years ago) link

juche y'all

mookieproof, Monday, 19 December 2011 03:52 (twelve years ago) link

threes: hitchens, havel, kim

mookieproof, Monday, 19 December 2011 03:52 (twelve years ago) link

woo

sandbanana, Monday, 19 December 2011 04:41 (twelve years ago) link

hoo

Aimless, Monday, 19 December 2011 05:25 (twelve years ago) link

Now what? Can they just get the new kid addicted to Starcraft to offset any need for war?

kingfish sandbox bonaparte, Monday, 19 December 2011 05:37 (twelve years ago) link

i think i've always tried to be as humorless as possible whenever posting to ilx. even though i recently broke that rule in some fucking sex euphemisms thing, it bugged me for a few days. because i would never want to be part of this kind of thing, where, like... "juche yall!!!" i wish he had posted a picture of jamie kennedy from that movie where he's a wigger or something (a last minute edit changed it from "why yall dissin juche???") and then a few hours pass and he thought of another joke about threes and then a starcraft joke to end it, expressed in the clumsiest way possible.

dylannnnnnnnn, Monday, 19 December 2011 06:01 (twelve years ago) link

no shit?

Aimless, Monday, 19 December 2011 06:13 (twelve years ago) link

yeah sorry.

dylannnnnnnnn, Monday, 19 December 2011 06:15 (twelve years ago) link

can i help you guys blast through the one liners so we can get this over with?

and let me save you guys the time

http://i185.photobucket.com/albums/x295/Neo-Babylonian/KimJongIL-SoRonery.jpg

dylannnnnnnnn, Monday, 19 December 2011 06:20 (twelve years ago) link

they misspelled 'ornery'

suggest biffa (henrietta lacks), Monday, 19 December 2011 06:22 (twelve years ago) link

"wigger" and "ronery" in the space of 3 posts, kudos

Seed Production Scientist cum Head (Julie Lagger), Monday, 19 December 2011 07:42 (twelve years ago) link

hard to put into words, but it's unfortunate how the response to North Korea among most people is "lol team america" and not "one of the world's greatest tragedies."

/soapbox

Matt Armstrong, Monday, 19 December 2011 07:59 (twelve years ago) link

how long had he been il

vaclav harbl (fart), Monday, 19 December 2011 08:15 (twelve years ago) link

Probably died of embarrassment after hearing this excuse:

"When we stayed in Pyongyang during training our players were hit by lightning, and more than five of them were hospitalised," said coach Kim, without naming the affected players specifically.

"Some stayed in hospital and then came to Germany later than the rest of us. The goalkeeper and the four defenders were most affected, and some midfielders as well. The physicians said the players were not capable of participating in the tournament.

"But World Cup football is the most important and significant event for a footballer, so they don't want to think about anything but football.

"The fact that they played could be called abnormal, the result of very strong will."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/13949811.stm

James, Monday, 19 December 2011 08:43 (twelve years ago) link

Amazing acting:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSWN6Qj98Iw

James, Monday, 19 December 2011 09:36 (twelve years ago) link

Sonic event of the year, that.

Michael Jones, Monday, 19 December 2011 09:42 (twelve years ago) link

think my bad one liner of choice will be something like "first seve now kim jong il, it's been a bad year for golf".

m. yeux, Monday, 19 December 2011 10:03 (twelve years ago) link

Maybe they can put this crazy building to use now as a giant mausoleum :

http://images.blog-u.net/wp-content/original/2010_11/Ryugyong-Hotel-Pyongyang-North-Korea.jpg

~_|||||||||||||||||||||||||_~ (Matt #2), Monday, 19 December 2011 10:16 (twelve years ago) link

xp bad year for opera too, and swimming.

Neil S, Monday, 19 December 2011 10:22 (twelve years ago) link

it looks much nicer these days btw (i.e. has a facade added)
http://www.lindsayfincher.com/gallery/d/18046-2/DPRK_yanggakdo_hotel_view_18.JPG

ken c, Monday, 19 December 2011 10:50 (twelve years ago) link

yeah they're actually moving forward to maybe opening it. I assume they've stopped airbrushing it out of official photos?

Matt Armstrong, Monday, 19 December 2011 11:06 (twelve years ago) link

looking forward to when it blasts off to start its journey to Pluto.

Neil S, Monday, 19 December 2011 11:10 (twelve years ago) link

Serious numbers station vibe from this: http://www.northkoreatech.org/2011/12/19/voice-of-korea-announces-death-of-kim-jong-il/

James, Monday, 19 December 2011 11:15 (twelve years ago) link

If someone doesn't mix chunks of the above with the mass weeping and blend in some Wolfgang Voigt and send it to Xmas #1, then I might have to do it.

Michael Jones, Monday, 19 December 2011 12:38 (twelve years ago) link

...and we have a new Dead Pool leader.

I actually came here to check up on this. Can you link to the standings plz?

Stevie :-D, Monday, 19 December 2011 13:01 (twelve years ago) link

KIM J GONE, OUR NI**A DEAD

j crunchwrap supreme, Monday, 19 December 2011 13:06 (twelve years ago) link

racist

ken c, Monday, 19 December 2011 13:25 (twelve years ago) link

he's korean - ninjas are japanese

ken c, Monday, 19 December 2011 13:25 (twelve years ago) link

i found out this happened via buzz feed

your voice of treason, Monday, 19 December 2011 13:59 (twelve years ago) link

buzzfeed

your voice of treason, Monday, 19 December 2011 13:59 (twelve years ago) link

Thx, WmC.

unregistered had been in the lead for months but failed to pick either Hitchens or Kim, allowing abanana -- who picked both -- to surpass him for the lead.

jaymc, Monday, 19 December 2011 14:11 (twelve years ago) link

noooo wait, I picked Hitchens! he wasn't on my original ballot, but I subbed him in before the deadline:

You've got Dennis Frederiksen twice. Wanna pick another?

― Zsa Zsa Gay Bar (jaymc), Monday, January 3, 2011 3:05 PM (1 hour ago)

oh dang, thanks for pointing that out. here's my revised list:

Charlie Louvin
Aretha Franklin
Andy Whitfield
Dennis Frederiksen
Ed Thompson (politician)
Brian Lenihan, Jr.
Harmon Killebrew
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
D.K. Holm
Keisuke Kuwata
Guy David Innes-Ker, 10th Duke of Roxburghe
Derryn Hinch
Brian Haw
Dave Rose (basketball coach)
Christopher Hitchens

I switched out Twiggy too because my "sources" tell me that she isn't likely to die this year. keep in mind that this is highly privileged information, and I'd appreciate it no one would repeat it outside of this thread.

― i probably busted a nut when i was tossing her cookie salad (unregistered), Monday, 3 January 2011 16:34 (10 months ago)

I think you just forgot to update my ballot. I should have 262 points, then.

unregistered, Monday, 19 December 2011 14:28 (twelve years ago) link

His "love of the cinema bordered on the obsessive," notes the BBC in its obituary. "He is said to have collected a library of 20,000 Hollywood movies…. In 1978, he ordered the abduction of a South Korean film director, Shin Sang-ok and his actress wife Choi Eun-hee. They were held separately for five years before being reunited at a party banquet. They said afterwards that Mr Kim had apologized for the kidnappings and asked them to make movies for him. They completed seven before escaping to the West in 1986."

http://mubi.com/notebook/posts/daily-briefing-kim-jong-il-cinephile

"The cinema occupies an important place in the overall development of art and literature. As such it is a powerful ideological weapon for the revolution and construction."

So wrote Kim Jong-il in his 1987 essay The Cinema and Directing.

Countless leaders have recognised film's potential for propaganda. But for the North Korean leader, who has died aged 69, cinema was much, much more.

His enormous collection of video cassettes incorporated everything from Hollywood westerns to Japanese monster movies....

"No production of high ideological and artistic value can evolve out of a creative group whose members are not united ideologically and in which discipline and order have not been established," he decreed in 1987.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-16245174

Dr Morbius, Monday, 19 December 2011 14:57 (twelve years ago) link

I think you just forgot to update my ballot. I should have 262 points, then.

My bad! Yes, it looks like I switched out Frederiksen for Lenihan, but I forgot to also switch out Twiggy for Hitchens.

Thanks for calling that to my attention.

You are now back on top.

jaymc, Monday, 19 December 2011 15:15 (twelve years ago) link

http://img4.hostingpics.net/pics/365002angel.gif

zappi, Monday, 19 December 2011 15:23 (twelve years ago) link

Goodby Kim Jong Il. We Made You A Cookie. But We Eated It.

Y.O. Mini (MarkG oo la showaddywaddy), Monday, 19 December 2011 16:00 (twelve years ago) link

In 1978, he ordered the abduction of a South Korean film director, Shin Sang-ok and his actress wife Choi Eun-hee. They were held separately for five years before being reunited at a party banquet.

Worst paid-gig for Cilla Black ever.

Y.O. Mini (MarkG oo la showaddywaddy), Monday, 19 December 2011 16:02 (twelve years ago) link

Can't believe all this staged weeping and wailing over a dead head of state, you'd never pull that shit over here.

Seed Production Scientist cum Head (Julie Lagger), Monday, 19 December 2011 17:06 (twelve years ago) link

NV you didn't even correct the extra 'i' i accidentally added to the word 'responsible' ;_;

lebateauivre, Monday, 19 December 2011 17:38 (twelve years ago) link

Hilarious public displays of indoctrination lie close to home, sure. The beast that can be mass-mourning (lolNult). But my point was that I fear it's not a temporary mass psychose like with Diana, but indoctrination at its most succesful: people actually feel their demi-God died.

lebateauivre, Monday, 19 December 2011 17:40 (twelve years ago) link

Via ILX vet donut bitch:

https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/404905_10150477138938879_611153878_8717916_366871026_n.jpg

I call "Game of Throats."

Ned Raggett, Monday, 19 December 2011 17:40 (twelve years ago) link

Let me put it this way: I would have liked to see small signs (a wink, unconvincing behaviour) of the people that are 'mourning', to somehow show us "it's ok guys lol, we don't really mean this. Look at me trying to cry my eyes out over this fucker lol". But I haven't seen it yet.

But then the 'apparatsjik' wouldn't ever allow images like that to be broadcast. They probably torture and shoot people not crying enough.

I don't know, I am with the person up here who is depressed that most reaction are "lol that puppet from team america died".,

lebateauivre, Monday, 19 December 2011 17:44 (twelve years ago) link

From the comments on a friend's fb post: "Not a good year for guys who wear women's sunglasses (Qadaffi, Kim Jong-Il). Hope Al Davis is okay ..."

Johnny Fever, Monday, 19 December 2011 17:46 (twelve years ago) link

Uh...Davis is already dead.

Ned Raggett, Monday, 19 December 2011 17:46 (twelve years ago) link

That was the joke, methinks.

Johnny Fever, Monday, 19 December 2011 17:47 (twelve years ago) link

I certainly hope it was one!

Ned Raggett, Monday, 19 December 2011 17:49 (twelve years ago) link

rip but should have his own thread imo

bloating forecast: ruff swells (p much resigned to deems), Monday, 19 December 2011 17:51 (twelve years ago) link

new kid is the NK Jonah Hill

Dr Morbius, Monday, 19 December 2011 18:13 (twelve years ago) link

http://a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/s320x320/384094_275615692483624_268425733202620_879595_101787784_n.jpg

Foster guy sad when he heard the news.

Lord Sotosyn, Monday, 19 December 2011 19:19 (twelve years ago) link

Nevah forget the good times:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lwoSFQb5HVk

Sanpaku, Monday, 19 December 2011 20:00 (twelve years ago) link

what will happen to http://kimjongillookingatthings.tumblr.com/ ??

nice catch cuauhtemoc blanco niño (dayo), Monday, 19 December 2011 20:33 (twelve years ago) link

hope this one will be as good http://kimjongunlookingatthings.tumblr.com/

nice catch cuauhtemoc blanco niño (dayo), Monday, 19 December 2011 20:33 (twelve years ago) link

Looking at his lunch?

Dermot O'Leary is playing some beats/at night he's a TV presenter (snoball), Monday, 19 December 2011 20:54 (twelve years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/Egl1o.jpg

elks thunder, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 01:20 (twelve years ago) link

would be perfect if it said "Kim Jong II"

nice catch cuauhtemoc blanco niño (dayo), Tuesday, 20 December 2011 01:22 (twelve years ago) link

i guess the main talking point re his death is whether it will be a bigger loss to 4chan whites or tumblr whites

awesome to have a clever englishman zinging yr enemies (nakhchivan), Tuesday, 20 December 2011 01:31 (twelve years ago) link

It's a good thing they've already canceled Community.

remy bean in exile, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 01:32 (twelve years ago) link

Ken Jeong ill, nobody wants to see his sorry ass waste away

remy bean in exile, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 01:33 (twelve years ago) link

Communisty

t. silaviver, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 01:33 (twelve years ago) link

Congratulations to the "Haters Gonna Hate" kid on his new role as Leader of North Korea btw.

Action Jackson (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 20 December 2011 08:29 (twelve years ago) link

i really kinda dig the idea of hitchens and havel sitting at the gates and god being like 'ok yall get to pick #3' and they turn to each other and smirk and then

HOOS aka driver of steen, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 09:16 (twelve years ago) link

the gates to what

Matt Armstrong, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 09:30 (twelve years ago) link

respective gates

HOOS aka driver of steen, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 09:30 (twelve years ago) link

god being like y'all

delonge and winding refn (p much resigned to deems), Tuesday, 20 December 2011 09:34 (twelve years ago) link

http://newspaper.li/static/37f31290e35bebe2d1905c46726d7b53.jpg

max max max max, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 12:49 (twelve years ago) link

Perry's Latest Oops Moment: 'Kim Jong the Second'

lebateauivre, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 22:52 (twelve years ago) link

oh god

HOOS aka driver of steen, Wednesday, 21 December 2011 02:04 (twelve years ago) link

people cried their eyes out when keegan left newcastle ffs.

ken c, Thursday, 22 December 2011 09:53 (twelve years ago) link

now there really was a cruel dictator

N1ck, Thursday, 22 December 2011 10:00 (twelve years ago) link

i heard he once admitted that he luvs beating people

ken c, Thursday, 22 December 2011 10:12 (twelve years ago) link

ok that was pretty lol

river wolf, Thursday, 22 December 2011 15:48 (twelve years ago) link

posted upthread. amusing, though.

Aimless, Friday, 23 December 2011 00:30 (twelve years ago) link

no aimless, this is a different one!!

nice catch cuauhtemoc blanco niño (dayo), Friday, 23 December 2011 00:42 (twelve years ago) link

(slaps forehead)

Aimless, Friday, 23 December 2011 00:44 (twelve years ago) link

i guess the main talking point re his death is whether it will be a bigger loss to 4chan whites or tumblr whites

― awesome to have a clever englishman zinging yr enemies (nakhchivan), Tuesday, 20 December 2011 01:31 (3 days ago)

tumblrs 1 4chans 0

nakhchivan, Friday, 23 December 2011 00:45 (twelve years ago) link

ghostrides the whip

HOOS aka driver of steen, Thursday, 29 December 2011 04:09 (twelve years ago) link

aerodynamic

Dranke, the German Drake Impersonator (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 29 December 2011 04:52 (twelve years ago) link

lmao I see what you did there xp

nice catch cuauhtemoc blanco niño (dayo), Thursday, 29 December 2011 13:33 (twelve years ago) link

ty, ty

HOOS aka driver of steen, Thursday, 29 December 2011 16:33 (twelve years ago) link

I can see why all the libertarians like Arizona - Communism looks cold.

M. White, Thursday, 29 December 2011 17:16 (twelve years ago) link

they don't call it the Cold War for nothing! waka waka waka!

~connecticut~ (henrietta lacks), Thursday, 29 December 2011 19:34 (twelve years ago) link

o_o

HOOS aka driver of steen, Friday, 30 December 2011 19:30 (twelve years ago) link


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