make up some fake, inscrutable adages and post them here

it's a rare scratch can't be fair itched by a blair witch

every cowboy was a cowman once

The meticulous man is the tabbouleh on the meze table of life.

winner winner sheen dinner

Don't discriminate, inseminate

Hanging your soul from a telephone pole

the worst you can expect is often the best someone else plans on offering you so fuck 'em

― silby, Thursday, 1 December 2011 01:12 (8 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

I resisted, but: That's the winner.

Holding out for a better looking, one-legged stripper

Staying young while working for a union is like paying for dental work under the table

the head of a chicken often hid the heart of a biologist

Any time is plenty time.

Pendulums swing but prisms refract.

when life gives you lemons, make time

It's better to break horses than to gallop aimlessly

three sure things in life
pain, death and carrots

please don't talk about baseball

possibility is a crane of deceit

a prussian in the russian embassy
minds his p's and queues

it is always 4:43 when the time runs out

Only if the team is behind. It just means the keeper has come out for the last corner.

^ clever

Ain't no train can train a train

A melon's always mighty til it's in the patch.

every time a pony smiles, a beetle gets its sun chips

Wear your glasses too tight, roll over all night.

The world does not need a stricter teabag.

Sounds to me like a case of the bird calling the beetle a bull.

What use is a sideways wheel to a sleigh hound in summer?

Coffee before you get 8on the bus will make you want to piss and cuss.

uh "get on". also realize that was probably too scrutable for this thread.

there ain't no funk without a mess of business

the salad needs to stay on the fork.

snow that falls on the heights is doomed to sigh at the torrents

chicken pox before nine, you're doing fine!

the last cat is still envied by the first estate

Consider your friends as a farmer considers the hedgerows

seven on a bench makes light the sitting

early to sleep, early to beep-beep

count not the peasants in the meadow, but rather the number of holes in their shoes

even colanders sometimes want for advice!

a cauliflower may be as a bedpost to a junebug, just as a widow loathes deer ticks

a pharmacy what never closeth is like a paintstall in April rain

marking one's words is sure to bring trouble, brief though it may be. marking one's words twice, however, is utmost folly

a chambermaid is never satisfied until last night's tales are recounted. a chamberpot is never satisfied until last night's ales are recanted.

what comes between men and valleys is best saved for a winter's long walk

much wisdom be wise, yet wiser still is the man who can hurl a dreidel to Tipperary

in the marketplace of ideas, it's often the smallest gnu which registers the first objection

if pornography were baseball, then umpires would be blind to all balks

when desperation sets in, a pile of dusty handkerchiefs surpass a repast of luncheon meat

he who spites his enemy is like a cheesecloth which has never befriended curds

When all signs point to yes, the body says no