Excelsior thread! Lots of laughs, rolling on the floor lauging, umm, maybe we should think of some short ways of saying that...

Where are those sea lion pics originally from? Are they for real?

-- Tuomas (lixnix...), February 19th, 2007. (Tuomas) (later)

nah, it's a dude in a sea lion costume.

-- Ms Misery (missmisery7...), February 19th, 2007. (MsMisery) (later)

-- Geir Hongro (geirhon...), February 19th, 2007.

What about if it's just a brain? In a jar?

-- It's Expected I'm Maud Gonne (noodlevagu...), February 19th, 2007.

-- Moisture G Mess (gzeusmant...), February 19th, 2007 9:06 PM. (The GZeus)

This staff goes to L.

-- nklshs (nklsh...), February 19th, 2007 9:09 PM. (nklshs)

Your tips on accommodation (budget priced), cafes, galleries, sightseeing, oddities, places to take weird and wonderful photos, and generally cool/fun places very gratefully received.

-- Daniel Marcus (danielmarcus6...), December 25th, 2006.

Answers

I hope it worked out for you.

-- PPlains (pleasant.plain...), February 19th, 2007.

"Your Lesbian tips please" spoof thread in 5...4...3...

-- It's Expected I'm Maud Gonne (noodlevagu...), February 19th, 2007.

Followed by "your lesbian tits", obv.

-- ailsa_xx (ailsa.watso...), February 19th, 2007.

You had to get that one off your chest?

-- It's Expected I'm Maud Gonne (noodlevagu...), February 19th, 2007.

Oh, lez not turn this into a pun thread.

-- ailsa_xx (ailsa.watso...), February 19th, 2007.

JOKE

nb: set your watch to pre-2002 first.

i find 600 escudos is usually reasonable.

END OF JOKE

-- grimly fiendish (simonmai...), February 20th, 2007.

really mature, guys. such saphomoric humor.

-- hm (mi...), February 20th, 2007.

-- nklshs (nklsh...), February 20th, 2007. (nklshs) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-- It's Expected I'm Maud Gonne (noodlevagu...) (webmail), February 21st, 2007 11:02 AM. (Modal Fugue) (later) (link)

Little bit of politics.

-- White Collar Boxer (juror...) (webmail), February 21st, 2007 11:02 AM. (DomPassantino) (later) (link)

little bit of shit west end musical

-- It's Expected I'm Maud Gonne (noodlevagu...) (webmail), February 21st, 2007 11:03 AM. (Modal Fugue) (later) (link)

Little bit of Andrew Lloyd Webber's cum on his chin

-- White Collar Boxer (juror...) (webmail), February 21st, 2007 11:03 AM. (DomPassantino) (later) (link)

-- temporary enrique (miltonpinsk...), Today. (later)

-- ZR (teenagequie...), February 21st, 2007.

i blame my father and years and years of "you're so tall, you must be great at basketball" for clouding my vision until this very day
-- ZR (teenagequie...), February 21st, 2007.

but NO MORE
-- ZR (teenagequie...), February 21st, 2007.

ah fuck it i ain't got the time to follow basketball
-- ZR (teenagequie...), February 21st, 2007.

TOO BUSY SUCKIN ON A DING DONG
-- 69 (plsmit...), February 21st, 2007.

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yeah but what if you want to rename it to something more informative than xpost?
-- sterl clover (s.clove...), February 21st, 2007 7:38 AM. (s_clover)

-- JordanC (jordan...) (webmail), February 21st, 2007 4:22 PM. (JordanC) (later) (link)

(I could've put another "eating" in there but I didn't)

-- JordanC (jordan...) (webmail), February 21st, 2007 4:23 PM. (JordanC) (later) (link)

-- resumo impetus (n...), February 21st, 2007 4:03 PM. (blueski) (later)

or Break and Enter, you go to jail for that.

-- Captain Purple Items (ilx.onim...), February 21st, 2007 4:10 PM. (nu_onimo) (later)

this is a song in the making

-- scary german latebloomer (posercore24...), February 21st, 2007 4:54 PM. (clonefeed) (later) (link)

i think randy newman may have already written it.

-- scott seward (skotro...), February 21st, 2007 4:56 PM. (121212) (later) (link)

-- Trayce (spamspanke...), February 21st, 2007 12:49 AM. (later)

-- forksclovetofu (forksclovetof...) (webmail), February 22nd, 2007 2:54 AM. (forksclovetofu) (later) (link)

-- Little kernel of salty honey (samsajk...) (webmail), February 23rd, 2007 3:40 PM. (crunkleJ) (later) (link)

You're not supposed to bring up 9/11 until the second date.

-- JordanC (jordan...) (webmail), February 23rd, 2007 3:41 PM. (JordanC) (later) (link)

I brought it up in a "sexy" way. I said in a breathy voice, "Fly your jetliner into my Pentagon...."

-- Little kernel of salty honey (samsajk...) (webmail), February 23rd, 2007 3:47 PM. (crunkleJ) (later) (link)

"Our twin towers are on fire!"

-- Little kernel of salty honey (samsajk...) (webmail), February 23rd, 2007 3:48 PM. (crunkleJ) (later) (link)

This is just what I needed this morning: 9/11 innuendo.

-- danno martinez (thedanmarti...) (webmail), February 23rd, 2007 3:48 PM. (danno martinez) (later) (link)

what is adblock?

― lex pretend, Wednesday, November 30, 2011 1:39 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Permalink

i think he was in the beastie boys

― no-one writes to the (pomplamau5), Wednesday, November 30, 2011 1:42 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Permalink

Ah, the subtle joy of old Excel entries..

pˆnk s lord sükråt cunctør on August 30th, 2006
lamonte young meets cary grant!

Liked that one...

xpost what is dadjoek

LJ swears up and down that the new Wilco is the best thing they've ever done

― gov. brownback blows a lot (henrietta lacks), Wednesday, November 30, 2011 4:15 AM (11 hours ago)

you mean the guy that made a chocolate & cheese sauce to serve with fish?

― v-shasty, Wednesday, November 30, 2011 4:16 AM (11 hours ago)

classic

Frantisek Kotzwara, musician:

"He is perhaps more famous for the notorious nature of his death.[2]" the notorious masturbatory nature i think you mean

Stephen David Wyatt Milligan, British MP:

"He was found dead in his flat in Chiswick, London in February 1994, strangled by an electrical cord during an act of autoerotic asphyxiation.[1]" - well there we go, that's frank, bravo

Vaughn Bodē, artist:

"Bodē's death was due to autoerotic asphyxiation, or perhaps the use of asphyxia as a meditation aid: his last words (to his son) were, "Mark, I've seen God four times, and I'm going to see him again soon. That's No. 1 to me, and you're No. 2."" - uh ok, that's the end of researching this topic. i am fucked up for lyfe now

― Z S, Wednesday, November 30, 2011 4:06 AM (Yesterday)

Number 2 shoulda been number 1 to Bode
If you ain't seeing god, quit choking your goddamn self

Daniel's stuff on the Republican thread always makes me laugh.

he should, as i am (Santorum's) constituency.

― Daniel, Esq., Thursday, December 1, 2011 2:07 AM (10 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

well, me and his wife and their 42 kids and his parents and his in-laws and a few friends from the "No Sex 'Till Marriage" support group he sponsors.

― Daniel, Esq., Thursday, December 1, 2011 2:08 AM (10 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

okay, mitt romney is TERRIBLE at retail politics.

i'm sort of torn on this. on the one hand, i think i'd hate doing this as much as romney obviously does. on the other hand, if he just relaxed -- i.e., if he wasn't looking for the sharp or witty line (which doesn't work in these settings), or so quick to deliver a false greeting (and it shows), or so gifted as ruining the possibility of conversation (see virtually every effort to engage a voter here) -- he'd be okay.

― Daniel, Esq., Thursday, December 1, 2011 1:41 PM Bookmark Permalink

so basically you are saying if Mitt Romney was a little less like Mitt Romney, he'd be okay

― OH NOES, Thursday, December 1, 2011 1:42 PM Bookmark Permalink

no.

― Daniel, Esq., Thursday, December 1, 2011 1:44 PM Bookmark Permalink

i am saying if mitt romney were a lot less like mitt romney, he'd be okay.

― Daniel, Esq., Thursday, December 1, 2011 1:44 PM Bookmark Permalink

missed italics on "lot" but still lol

Pretty sure referring to one's political opponents as either stupid or crazy is unlikely to convert many of them.

― M. White, Thursday, December 1, 2011 8:57 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Permalink

depends how stupid / crazy they are

― iatee, Thursday, December 1, 2011 8:57 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Permalink

fyi they dont kill the animals with guns in factory farming

― PROVEN BY BOOZE SCIENCE, Thursday, December 1, 2011 9:34 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Permalink

of course not, anyone with sense would go for the unarmed ones

― OH NOES, Thursday, December 1, 2011 9:35 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Permalink

Sorry you spent too much on Cheetos, markers. Poor people have been feeling this for years

― superb mario bothers (crüt) (step hen faps), Thursday, 1 December 2011 22:09 (Yesterday) Bookmark Permalink

big lol @ dan's post.

tonight i bought a quart of regular "golden nog", a quart of "vanilla nog" and a fifth of captain

― k3vin k., Friday, December 2, 2011 1:28 AM (2 days ago) Bookmark Permalink

i apparently sold a serial comma as well

― k3vin k., Friday, December 2, 2011 1:28 AM (2 days ago) Bookmark Permalink

nogl

― wil smif, Friday, December 2, 2011 1:35 AM (2 days ago) Bookmark

this thread went from sex to word problems way too quickly

― recently deposed application inspector for the (league of women voters), Monday, December 5, 2011 2:56 PM Bookmark Permalink

^ needs to be c&p'ed to 'Solitary Posts' imo

I think about most often to calm my anxiety. For instance I was on a flight recently and I started to get really nervous. I'm not the greatest flyer. Then I started thinking about how not everything is about me and how insignificant I am and how unlikely it was that the plane would crash just because I was on it. It helped. So did the benzos.

― ᶘ ᵒᴥᵒᶅ (~curious orange~), Wednesday, December 7, 2011 11:46 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Permalink

thanks I will help you open up ms word later

― iatee, Wednesday, December 7, 2011 3:02 PM (29 minutes ago) Bookmark Permalink

can't be stopped can't be tamed

Hoos, just remember that most americans's would subscribe to the observation of Sam Rayburn: "any jackass can kick a barn down, but it takes a carpenter to build one."

You have to offer something constructive, other than anger and wilding around in the streets or most of america will tune you out.

― Aimless, Wednesday, 7 December 2011 19:23 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

what, they built a barn like yesterday

― iatee, Wednesday, 7 December 2011 19:24 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Permalink

Rich in lols, that thread.

From Gun Etiquette thread:

The guns are at the left of the plate. People get confused about which to use first, but just work from outside in (left to right). There may be an oyster gun on the right but it's much smaller than the others and easy to tell apart.

― not uplifting (Abbott), Thursday, December 1, 2011

Loool