great moments in small personal failure

Earlier this year, I thought I lost my work security badge when I went out to lunch. I got a replacement, then discovered the old badge in my backpack.

I have done this before with subway passes.

worked at the same (rich) place (as a 32-hour "part-timer" with no benefits) for four years now

was not invited to the company holiday party for the fifth consecutive year

xp A relative thought that he'd lost his front door keys, so he went out and bought new locks, fitted them (which involved chiseling parts of the door away because they were larger than the old locks), and then stood back to admire his handywork, putting his hands in the pockets of the overall he was wearing... to find the 'lost' keys.

xpost fuck that company. that's awful.

1. I just stapled the wrapping paper for my wife's present because I can't find tape anywhere

My mom once ran out of tape on Christmas eve and finished securing the paper on our presents with sewing pins. We had to return them all to her the next day.

ugh, mookie, been there, done that.

didn't know if I wanted to party or fold laundry

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TGrep3PDAs

of course, there was little difference in my world

my mom bade me deliver a birthday card to my ex a few months ago. (the unspoken background was that my mom had emailed some shit she really should not have back in january.) but rather than write in the card, she wrote her message on a piece of paper inserted in the card "so [my ex] could re-use the card."

so many levels of wtf tbh

who is elks thunder and what is their problem btw

Dumped a glass of water through the vents of my external hard drive. Which is actually fine, shockingly.

I'm pretty sure I could post daily updates on this thread. I am a complete spaz.

who is elks thunder and what is their problem btw

http://i.imgur.com/9rFe1.gif

oh okay I get it now

idgi

RFS did you have to sit in the office bathroom sewing with no trousers on?

Oh yeah, that was degrading too! I had to sit on the toilet, which like most public bathrooms only has the lid with the hole in it and not the top lid that would actually be useful to sit on. God, I miss having an office with a door.

i tried to steam some broccoli the other day, failed utterly, ended up chewing morosely on semi-raw florets.

actually i'm not sure where the great moment in that is

Raw broccoli is better than cooked, so that's what's great.

got my first 'complaint' on eBay as a seller in about 5 years because I mailed someone a Smells Like Children jewel case with a Portrait of an American Family cd inside.