CHICAGO: If Hepatitis C Were Attacking Your Face Instead of Your Liver You'd Be Doing Something About It

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Not all messages are displayed: show all messages (5123 of them)

View Previous Page...

There we are.

― crunkleJ (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:21 (seventeen years ago) link

Cool. Now I can finally be a web designer.

― crunkleJ (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:22 (seventeen years ago) link

ha bloody ha.

I'm still here, you know.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:23 (seventeen years ago) link

Smilies cover all transgressions, right?

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:23 (seventeen years ago) link

"I'd be a lot better if you bought me a drink."

I can never use this line. :(

I don't understand. ¿Why not?

― crunkleJ (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:27 (seventeen years ago) link

I suppose if I were cheerful enough, I could say that to a girl, thus going against the standard "buying a drink" meatbar wisdom. The real trouble is, whenever I say things like that, I come off as full of hate. This does not play well in Poughkeepsie.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:29 (seventeen years ago) link

I was being a barfly. And btw, any possible slickness this "line" might indicate was promptly done away with when he ordered my beer and I said something like, "¡Oh no! Wait, wait--I was kidding. Here let me buy you a drink." Yet he bought me a drink. Hail the conquering queero.

― ¿CrunkleJ? (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:31 (seventeen years ago) link

RAH!

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:33 (seventeen years ago) link

any possible slickness this "line" might indicate

No, that's just it! There's nothing slick about it! It's brass balls to say something like that, or just not caring at all. That's what's hot about it.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:36 (seventeen years ago) link

I have to say that I had the same reaction I would have to any one of my friends' saying it was the one I felt when I heard myself saying it--I did an small internal double-take. Pretty much the same reaction I had when Kenan told Robin her tits looked great in her Halloween costume.

― crunkleJ (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:38 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh. I was horrified at myself.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:40 (seventeen years ago) link

And to once again clarify -- I was thinking her tits were PART of her Halloween costume. I guess because I'd never noticed them before. Which I guess is just as insulting. In a way. I guess.

Oh God I don't know what I'm doing. Don't listen to me.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:43 (seventeen years ago) link

Stoney and I would go over to Buckle's and Puff would turn us on to a hot load of mescaline crumbled into a tumbler of ether with a float of Percocet jimmies. I'd wake up with blood on my ass, and then we'd get high. Those were some good times.

― &int (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:48 (seventeen years ago) link

Remind me to tell you my traintracks story.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:50 (seventeen years ago) link

Jerri: Do a lot of the people die of syphilis?

Noblet: Oh, absolutely. Historically, syphilis is right up there with Germans. It wiped out the Romanovs, it decimated our fleet at Pearl Harbor, and of course, Fidel Castro impersonated Marilyn Monroe and gave President Kennedy a case of syphilis so severe that eventually it blew the back of his head off.

― crunkleJ (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:51 (seventeen years ago) link

hahaha

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:52 (seventeen years ago) link

maybe i should give this show another chance, apart from my hate of the sedaris character and her bizarre facial tics.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 05:54 (seventeen years ago) link

You have convinced me. My hate is not fair. That would be like hating a mongoloid because they keep sticking their tongue out. They're also very funny people who say silly things!

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 06:03 (seventeen years ago) link

Before I retire for the evening I need to tell you before I forget that I just remembered on my drive back down to Chicago that I went to high school with a guy by the name of Jeff Posthumus. Cool name.

And this too:

Jerri Blank: Shazam. Look. Drake Rogers. Mmm, he makes me all puffy down there. I'd love to tame his blue vein swayback throbber.
Tammi Littlenut: What do you mean, Jerri?
Jerri Blank: Take him backstage behind the meat curtain, know what I mean? I'm talkin' about pounding out the veal.
Tammi Littlenut: Are you thinking about having sex already?
Jerri Blank: Does a pimp carry a razor?
Tammi Littlenut: I don't know...
Jerri Blank: Trust me, they all do.

― crunkleJ (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 06:06 (seventeen years ago) link

Ok, see but the "old whore" part of Jerri Blank is the part I like the least, because it's the farthest removed from Sedaris herself, and the thing she's least convincing at. And SHE DOESN'T ACT, she mugs. She has funny lines, yeah, VERY funny sometimes, but when it comes time for her to be someone she obviously isn't, instead of acting she sticks out her teeth and makes like she's some cross between a whore and a hick and Buckwheat. Which is nothing, really, it's just... a pose. IT'S NOT FUNNY. It's uncomfortable. I feel for her. I wish she was being funnier.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 06:15 (seventeen years ago) link

It's like watching "Wet Hot American Summer," if that helps any.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 06:23 (seventeen years ago) link

Cheap shot. Sorry.

'Night.

― whoop de doodle (kenan), Thursday, 14 December 2006 06:31 (seventeen years ago) link

blue vein swayback throbber

Stephen Colbert said that on TV last night! Or the night before. Something.

― Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Thursday, 14 December 2006 13:41 (seventeen years ago) link

Also: Jesse, I would like to borrow your Strangers with Candy DVDs. And those for that show that Jeff doesn't like.

― Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Thursday, 14 December 2006 13:44 (seventeen years ago) link

OMG THE END IS NEAR

― grbchv! (gbx), Thursday, 14 December 2006 13:55 (seventeen years ago) link

How many more, Evan?

I've got one tomorrow and then the paper. So close... so close...

― Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Thursday, 14 December 2006 14:21 (seventeen years ago) link

Jesse, I'm totally stealing your line, it's the most noirish thing I've heard in wee--well, since I watched Brick. And it will result in me being handed things with vodka in them, which is always never a bad idea!

― Laurel (Laurel), Thursday, 14 December 2006 14:52 (seventeen years ago) link

Okay, how do you strikethroughs? My usual HTML cheat-sheet has but it didn't come out right.

― Laurel (Laurel), Thursday, 14 December 2006 14:53 (seventeen years ago) link

[strike]~~like this?~~[/strike].

― otto midnight, that 'tofu makes you gay' ding dong (otto midnight), Thursday, 14 December 2006 14:56 (seventeen years ago) link

Ah, thanks. In that case, make my last post: And it will result in me being handed things with vodka in them, which is ~~always~~ never a bad idea!

― Laurel (Laurel), Thursday, 14 December 2006 14:58 (seventeen years ago) link

(Why does HTML site say to use "del"? Who knows?)

― Laurel (Laurel), Thursday, 14 December 2006 14:58 (seventeen years ago) link

this talk of vodka drinks makes me want to go out for cocktails tonight. not beer, COCKTAILS. i'm thinking about going to the holiday club around 10-ish if anyone cares to join me. i'll be in the back bar.

or i'll be at home, one or the other.

― otto midnight, that 'tofu makes you gay' ding dong (otto midnight), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:02 (seventeen years ago) link

I just use [s]~~Strangers With Candy~~[/s]

― JordanC (JordanC), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:17 (seventeen years ago) link

omgomgomgomg the laundry guy just came and picked up all our dirty laundry (and I was not shy about not throwing some things in there that I've been meaning to wash for awhile, like the quilt the cat puked on) and will bring it back today at 5:30 and IT IS FREE and he said we can do this once a week until January 31 FOR FREE.

For no money, a nice young man comes to our apartment and takes away two huge bags of dirty laundry and then someone brings the clothes back to me folded and clean and fresh at 5:30 pm. For free. Once a week. Until January 31. At no cost to me.

Best thing that has happened to me in like, I don't know. Months? Years?

― Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:28 (seventeen years ago) link

Why free?

― JordanC (JordanC), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:33 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm2310903/

Someone you know is famous.

My server at T's last night was wearing a color of nail polish that the woman at the salon said was called "I'm Not a Waitress."

― crunkleJ (crunkleJ), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:34 (seventeen years ago) link

i want a taco for my face hole.

― otto midnight, that 'tofu makes you gay' ding dong (otto midnight), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:37 (seventeen years ago) link

I have that - it's an OPI color called "I'm not really a waitress." It's a really nice red.

The laundry service is doing a promotion in our zip code - http://www.mud-room.com/. I'm guessing that it's a real drug dealer kind of move - get you hooked when it's free and then charge you $1.50 a pound for it.

Although, I think it's very smart. I usually have the time and the inclination to do the laundry myself. I like doing laundry! But when we're really super busy, I will drop it off. That has happened twice in our lives and we look at it as a necessary splurge, like taking a cab when it's pouring down rain and the train is broken far away from work. Now that I know that this place is trustworthy and efficient and reliable, I will be more likely to call on them for that necessary splurge in the future. It's more expensive, but then come here and get the shit so there's definitely value added there.

― Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:37 (seventeen years ago) link

proving the pair knows how to handle spitting on organs

― JordanC (JordanC), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:39 (seventeen years ago) link

Hey check it out, my bro in Chicago who does sound work for films did that one: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1914101/

― JordanC (JordanC), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:42 (seventeen years ago) link

If you asked people the number-one most-popular after-hours snack, the answer would usually be pizza. But for many of us, without question, it's Mexican food.
More specifically, it's the taco.

The answer is always pizza! Even when it's tacos! Dummies.

xpost - damn, we're all going to have to see that movie together since it's like a showcase for our show biz friends.

― Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:44 (seventeen years ago) link

No Moran, no credibility. And please, Flash Taco???!? C'MON

Altho they're totally OTM about biira.

― danno martinez (danno martinez), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:47 (seventeen years ago) link

dan, you better not be talking bad about flash taco.

― otto midnight, that 'tofu makes you gay' ding dong (otto midnight), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:48 (seventeen years ago) link

All I'm saying is I've had much better. I guess I'm separating my judgment it from eating tacos for pizza. Just about any taco is good for pizza, Flash included.

― danno martinez (danno martinez), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:50 (seventeen years ago) link

"judgement on it"

― danno martinez (danno martinez), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:51 (seventeen years ago) link

A woman I work with has Bell's palsy -- or at least I'm assuming that's what it is. She looked fine (if obese) until a couple of months ago, now she looks like she had a stroke.

― jaymc somehow missed a whole series of posts the other day (jaymc), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:53 (seventeen years ago) link

A week from tomorrow I'll be having Fiesta Mexicana for pizza and fried shrimp for dessert pizza.

― JordanC (JordanC), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:53 (seventeen years ago) link

i can not count the number of times i didn't want to see the second band at sub-t and instead went over to flash or underdog. i've brought flash taco back into the big horse which probably pissed the owner who worked the door off since the lounge was in back of a taco joint.

― otto midnight, that 'tofu makes you gay' ding dong (otto midnight), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:55 (seventeen years ago) link

John, maybe she had a stroke.

― Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Thursday, 14 December 2006 15:55 (seventeen years ago) link

Skipping 5023 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.