domestic outrages chronicle

it's very important to have a good flashlight handy.

Good flashlights aside, I am outraged at the very idea of "minimal" plumbing functionality.

I mean, it is outrageous that lxy can not flush with impunity! This has been weighing on me all day, and I want to go stand there and indignently foot-tap (with arms crossed and eyes narrowed) until those burglars plumbers are done.

i want you to do that as well (and for someone to film it).

this has to be the biggest domestic outrage ever on this whole sorry thread.

f. and i have always disagreed about bedding because i am a very hot sleeper but he gets cold so a couple of years ago i had a brainwave and bought him a single goose down quilt for his side of the bed so we wouldn't argue any more. harry loved it to death and made a beeline for it every night, and this summer when it became too hot f. put it on the floor and harry ditched us and has slept on it ever since. the other day f. said he didn't really want it back after months of harry lying on it so i got f. a new one and last night was the first time he used it and harry immediately leapt onto the bed and tried to dig a hole in the new quilt and then collapsed and lay around all night on it like a bad baby prince. f. didn't like this but i on the other hand did, i woke up at 3 am and heard harry's tiny regal snores and i lolled and lolled in the darkness.

you and harry are two terrible peas in a pod, i love you both very much :) <3

<3 that's because you're a terrible pea also.

would you guess that i have fruit flies!

i have been pretty clean too, i just have tomatoes out. i took the garbage out an hour ago. it had old bananas and fruit ends and other organic matter.

lol, did you see what I said on the banana thread about you.

moving house is a domestic outrage. i am never doing this again.

we had fruit flies this week too thanks to a crate of peaches that was getting overripe

we just spent 12 hours moving today, plus making car trips every night this last week btw the two places. went back for pretty much the last car load of stuff and the only thing i forgot was THE FUCKING BOX OF BATHROOM STUFF WHICH HAS ENRAGED ME.

i didn't have a shower this morning, i'm all sweaty and gross and dirty and i have no soap or shampoo or a toothbrush or any goddamn thing.

yeah i hate moving more than anything. my lease ends the end of next month and i'd like to move but i think i'm going to wait a couple more months at least until it's not 90º every day.

yeah i one point i just felt like crying. but i'm a bit of a baby about moving, i dunno it just brings up a terrible anxious feeling in me. i counted how many times i've moved house:
6 times before i turned 18
15 times since i turned 18

lucky for me, ytth is pretty much the greatest person in the world and he took care of 80% of the moving situation

iirc there is some statistic abt moving that gets trotted out regularly--like its the 3rd most stressful event for people after divorce and the death of a loved one.

yeah i've heard that too, but i feel like it's such a ridic thing to put on that list. i mean, it's stressful hardcore for about a week and then it's over.

One thing we aren't going to miss about the place we just moved out of: the rat-infested potential zombie attack tunnel to the parking

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jG8giQdA-eg

aw but won't you miss watching that amazing cardboard hobo palace grow into a cardboard mcmansion? and what about the dude out front with his rocks!

Cardboard shanty guy expanded during June to include a bike storage area!

Drac was outraged last night when he found himself OUTSIDE! He snuck out the back screen door as it was closing behind me, apparently. 15 min later, I kept hearing this very demanding and semi-panic-stricken meowing and found him pacing on the step. He glared at me so hard when I let him in, I'm lucky to still be unmaimed!

...

tmi

lol

with all due respect, Eljer toilets can fucking die.

quite the domestic outrage over use of bleach-based cleaner to clean the bathroom this afternoon.
some of us have sensitive noses, it seems.

i need to clean the bathroom today. or i need to clean something. also i need to go to ikea and get a couch cover and i want to buy a coffee table (not at ikea) and i want a duvet cover. all of this is making me outraged.

i got the couch cover and i feel so much better. i didn't get a coffee table at the antique store but i did get another bookshelf. but i don't know where to put it.

maybe you could put it on its side in front of your couch. two birds.

ha, it's a little too shallow though. also it smells like it's from a smoking household! oops.

i mean no offense to smoking households, lol

ohaha!

is it outrageous that i still have not purchased chairs to accompany my dining table and we eat all our meals at the coffee table while sitting on the couch while the dining table sits across the room looking sad and dejected, just begging for a party of 6?

the table is the villain of this story, not you, don't fall for its sad wooden tricks.

i am totally, completely outraged and my bathtub and its refusal to drain properly.
bathtub, you ruined my sunday!!!

my bathroom sink won't drain but it's my fault for not fixing it when it was just a little slow

you poor things, my pipes are perfect.

i just got our windows cleaned for the first time in 8 years, that is a bonafide domestic outrage.

i came here to post that but then i got carried away with boastfulness.

i am no longer outraged at my bathtub :)

Outrageously, we are OUT OF TONIC!!!

tsk.

Evidence of drunken debauchery strewn all over the house this morning, and the cats are Not Amused.

our fruit flies are too stupid to figure out how to go into the jarbl, much less how to get out of the fucking thing. jesus.

those little assholes are just walking around on the outside. goddamn motherfuckers, get in the jarbl!

i am outraged.

i made the holes bigger and 2 of them got in! now they're walking around inside. at what point do they go in the liquid and die from the pleasure of drinking too much balsamic vinegar? cuz if they just keep walking around, at some point someone's going to find the way out. and tell all the others.

5!! walking around still, though.

It can take awhile for those bastards to get overwhelmed and drowned. I usually use a mix of sugar and yeast in water for maximum attraction and death, and cut the hole in a T shape. The draping down bits from the T cut get them more confused about the way out, generally. But sometimes you get a smart one.

In other pestilence news - my yard is full of slug traps, paper cups tilted sideways with a few inches of beer (Bridgestone Indian Pale Ale, I think). Except now they are full of dead slug stew :/

7 now, and a couple more lurking around on the container. an especially crafty one walked in then walked right back out, suspicious little devil. as far as i know, none have died and none have escaped.