Books a Man Has Given Me That Made Me Swear NEVER to Go on Another Date with Him EVER Again

Message Bookmarked
Bookmark Removed
From 50 Books.

I will start with the obvious: The Celestine Prophecy. Now you go.

Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:13 (seventeen years ago) link

ooh, that's hard to top.

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:17 (seventeen years ago) link

Okay, that front cover is utterly inexplicable.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:26 (seventeen years ago) link

Okay, that front cover is utterly inexplicable.

"time to make the crazy!"

GAWD PVNCH (yournullfame), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:41 (seventeen years ago) link

I once gave a girl an autographed Toni Morrison novel. She seemed to like it but we broke up when she decided that crystal meth sounded like fun.

milo (milo), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:43 (seventeen years ago) link

god punch otm.

Rick Gibralter (grady), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:44 (seventeen years ago) link

One of my favorite tales of botched seduction from my female friends involves not only the gift of, also but dramatic readings from, The Giving Tree. My friend said when the dude started reading this to her she almost laughed, and when he said "I'd like you to have my copy" she knew it was time to go.

danno martinez (danno martinez), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:52 (seventeen years ago) link

that dianetics cover is awesome

latebloomer (clonefeed), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:53 (seventeen years ago) link

it promises a path to manual labor on other planets and if space travel is one day commonplace--and based on the lifetime contracts the scientology worker drones/members of hubbard's 'navy' sign--it's probably quite thought this is a depiction which will one day be literal.

bohren un der club of gear (bohren un der club of gear), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:57 (seventeen years ago) link

I think the opposite version of this thread would be more useful. Tell us which books you want, ladies. Does a set of the Pevear/Volohonsky Russian translations make you fall in love?

milo (milo), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 01:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Well, I can see circumstances under which I would go on another date with someone who gave me that particular copy of Dianetics, especially if he defaced it by turning their little white helmets into penis heads and write a clever inscription in the front cover.

Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:01 (seventeen years ago) link

The Fountainhead

a.b. (abanana), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:14 (seventeen years ago) link

and write a clever inscription in the front cover.

For instance, "Time to make the crazy!"

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:26 (seventeen years ago) link

The Fountainhead

-- a.b. (aaaaaathatsfivea...), February 13th, 2007.

otm!

latebloomer (clonefeed), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:33 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't mind people who *read* The Fountainhead, mind you, because I have. But I would prefer them so say, "The prose is clunky and the worldview is sorely incomplete" than for them to say, "You'll love this; it's one of my favorites."

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:35 (seventeen years ago) link

well yeah!

latebloomer (clonefeed), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:36 (seventeen years ago) link

it promises a path to manual labor on other planets and if space travel is one day commonplace--and based on the lifetime contracts the scientology worker drones/members of hubbard's 'navy' sign--it's probably quite thought this is a depiction which will one day be literal.

-- bohren un der club of gear (speeeed.to.roa...), February 13th, 2007.

no doubt, i just love the way it looks. i love sf art.

latebloomer (clonefeed), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:39 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www9.yatego.com/images/428b84fecc19b0.4/pid881251.jpg

milo (milo), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:44 (seventeen years ago) link

Mind you, I have also read the Celestine Prophesies, because a girl gave it to me. And then wanted to talk about how she thought she could see the auras of trees. I was like, "So can I, when I do as much acid as you do."

xpost YIKES

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:44 (seventeen years ago) link

most of the books i've received as presents/loaners from love interests have been pretty cool. i can't remember any real duds.

children of mentalists (get bent), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 02:57 (seventeen years ago) link

although this book (given to me by an ex-crush) was a little new-agey. i liked it well enough at the time... i think i still have it.

children of mentalists (get bent), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:00 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.dynamic-eleiko.com/images/NaimBookCoverBig.jpg

scott seward (121212), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:08 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.jimriegelphoto.com/Images/BookCover.jpg

scott seward (121212), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:09 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.barefootinvestor.com/web/Book/Book%20Cover.jpg

scott seward (121212), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:10 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah, i don't think a man has ever given me a book that made me think this! and while maybe i should've thought twice about the boy who gave me 'infinite jest', i was all swoon swoon heartbeatz 'lo those many years ago. a guy did give me a dh lawrence book once, but this was after we had broken up. it was 'apocalypse'. haha. am quite sure that was unintentional though.
xpost, to before scott's awesome answers

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:14 (seventeen years ago) link

I know that's Richard Ramirez on the right, but at first glance I thought it was David Hasselhoff, which would make that book beyond awesome.

Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:15 (seventeen years ago) link

[many many xposts]

milo, it depends on the woman.

the Pevear/Volohonsky translations would have gotten me to swoon.
(my husband decided to indulge my love of Japanese rock bands, theater/film and shiny things instead).

Another great breakup book: De Profundis.

patita (patita), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:15 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.daviddarling.info/images/ToServeMan3.jpg

latebloomer (clonefeed), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:17 (seventeen years ago) link

http://bookweb.kinokuniya.co.jp/bimgdata/FC0060014164.JPG

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:21 (seventeen years ago) link

i would marry the man that gave me a copy of the happy hooker.

children of mentalists (get bent), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:23 (seventeen years ago) link

that man would probably be tokyo rosemary.

children of mentalists (get bent), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:24 (seventeen years ago) link

I kid, of course. if anyone ever gives you a copy of Naim Suleymanoglu - The Pocket Hercules - MARRY THEM, immediately.

scott seward (121212), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:26 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah, haha, you're right, jbr, esp if it was that pink cover edition! (which is the one i read when i was, like, 12...)

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:31 (seventeen years ago) link

given the right context, arguments could be made for a lot of books

that said, dianetics kinda pwns this thread

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:44 (seventeen years ago) link

i would way rather get dianetics than

max (maxreax), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:47 (seventeen years ago) link

Another great breakup book: De Profundis.

EMO HATER

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:55 (seventeen years ago) link

if anyone ever gives you a copy of Naim Suleymanoglu - The Pocket Hercules - MARRY THEM, immediately.

I love that dude. I remember seeing him in the Olympics and how he had to escape Communist Bulgaria so he could change his name.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:57 (seventeen years ago) link

lolol at "Vic Eating Cabbage"

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 03:57 (seventeen years ago) link

i think that anything on this amazon list would be a guaranteed future date-breaker.

Eisbär (Eisbär), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:00 (seventeen years ago) link

"My Awakening: A Path to Racial Understanding by David Ernest Duke"

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:03 (seventeen years ago) link

OTOH, you might get to score w/ either of the prussian blue chicks or paris hilton (same thing).

Eisbär (Eisbär), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:08 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.ansible.co.uk/books/necronom.gif

nklshs (nklshs), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:08 (seventeen years ago) link

speaking of paris hilton and books (an oxymoron, i know, but bear w/ me) -- i dunno what kind of reaction this one would get from a date:

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/0446694304.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

Eisbär (Eisbär), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:11 (seventeen years ago) link

Transformers: The Ultimate Guide

Transformers: The Ultimate Guide is a detailed look at the fantastic world of these mechanical marvels. Follow each character's history and witness the amazing evolution of the Transformers, from physical structure and weaponry to personalities, alliances, and important battles. Detailed illustrations show exactly how each character "transforms" from warrior robot to high-powered vehicle. Special feature spreads cover all aspects of the Transformers' world and include specially commissioned maps and detailed city plans of their home planet of Cybertron, descriptions of the giant space ark in which the Transformers traveled to Earth, major wars in Transformers history, and much more.

nklshs (nklshs), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:15 (seventeen years ago) link

from the author of the above amazon wishlist:

Newest Remy Zero Release: Music for Middle Americans, February 6, 2002
The band Remy Zero released its third and newest album, The Golden Hum, under the Elektra label, striking a resonant political chord across America. Critic Gary Schaefer got it right when he said, "Bands like U2 and Remy Zero are bringing answers to a nation, which after Sept. 11 has come to ask a lot more questions." The captivating album indeed bears political significance. The lyrics reflect our national condition, and are a much better barometer of the State of the Union than any petty Beltway politician could provide.
Comprised of frontman Cinjun Tate, guitarists Jeffrey Cain and Shelby Tate (Cinjun's bro), bassist Cedric LeMoyne, and drummer Gregory Slay, the quintet began as kids in Birmingham, Alabama. Many say their style resembles that of Radiohead, U2, and Black Lab. Amazon.com's Adam Silverman describes their lyrics as simultaneously "dark and uplifting, cynical and hopeful," while other aficionados refer to them as "longing" and "moody."

The first single of the album, "Save Me," is also the theme song of the hit WB show Smallville, which chronicles the high school career of budding super hero Clark Kent. Twenty-four-year-old actor Tom Welling plays Kent, who in this period is the best friend of the young Lex Luthor (Michael Rosenbaum). The able presence of Welling on the screen matches well with the message carried in "Save Me." Welling's Kent proves that nice guys finish last, yet he remains constant and true.

"Save Me" relies on a recurrent, subtly shifting chorus whose complex depth and beauty arises from its relative simplicity. The content is just as rich as the form: "I feel the waves crash down inside/ and they pulled me under/ I would give you anything you want, but know/ you were all I wanted/ and all my dreams have fallen down/ crawling around and around/ ...Somebody save me/ Let your warm hands break right through/ Somebody save me/ I don't care how you do it/ Just save me/ I made this whole world shine for you/ Just stay, stay/ Oh, come on/ I'm still waiting for you."

Listening to these lyrics brings pictures of a world encased in ice, knocked far from the stable orbit of a warm sun. Yet, the possibility ever remains that "warm hands" will "break right through" to save us, and we are desperate enough not to worry about how it happens. Practicality and effectiveness are what matter. The stage is set and the conditions are right for the man on a white horse (Clark Kent?) to arrive, just in time. An excellent and provocative suggestion that such a strongman is necessary to restore the pre-1913 American Republic is in Michael A. Ledeen's Machiavelli on Modern Leadership.

I have debated whether the passivity that comes at the receiving end of a hero's deeds is healthy for paleoconservatives to embrace, politically or spiritually. After all, Americanism means self-reliance, and even Tom Welling says in a WB interview that he does not like sheep.

However, there is no danger here. Men can dream. It helps to have ideals to compare reality to, a Northern Star, even as we recognize that our reality is forever doomed to fall short of those ideals. The journey and the effort are what count. There may be no man on a white horse, but there can be a damn good grassroots effort by Middle Americans. It is probably better that way, since a mass movement can never collectively compromise with the special interests, "banksters," and multinationals (not to imply that any of our leaders have sold out, but merely the foreclosure of the very possibility).

I envision a young, brooding, upcoming populist Right generation wielding Pat Buchanan's books with one hand and balancing The Golden Hum in the other. I also expect "Save Me" will play when the nominee takes the stage at the national party convention, the next time the grassroots conservatives field a presidential candidate.

max (maxreax), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:29 (seventeen years ago) link

OMG

Eisbär (Eisbär), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:40 (seventeen years ago) link

i really hope this is an elaborate amazon-based jole

max (maxreax), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:42 (seventeen years ago) link

by jole i obviously meant joke

max (maxreax), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:43 (seventeen years ago) link

ah fuck I was just about to post that!

Marmot (marmotwolof), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 04:43 (seventeen years ago) link

that review builds up so perfectly to the Buchanan line.

Rick Gibralter (grady), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 05:15 (seventeen years ago) link

However, there is no danger here. Men can dream.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 05:17 (seventeen years ago) link

i could totally see that PEW dude writing something like that ...

Eisbär (Eisbär), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 05:22 (seventeen years ago) link

I call a moratorium on men dreaming.

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 05:28 (seventeen years ago) link

PEW isn't that lyrical

friday on the porch (lfam), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 06:21 (seventeen years ago) link

i mean, talk about clunky prose

friday on the porch (lfam), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 06:21 (seventeen years ago) link

If a woman gave me Canadian Crosswords, I would know she was my soul mate.

Eazy (Eazy), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 06:38 (seventeen years ago) link

This would probably be a deal breaker even if I saw it on her shelf.

http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/P/0722532938.02._SS500_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

This, I just don't want to be given, at least not with any significance attached:
http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/P/0747546290.01._SS500_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Ed (dali), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 07:51 (seventeen years ago) link

"a guy did give me a dh lawrence book once, but this was after we had broken up. it was 'apocalypse'."

that is an insane book...first lawrence i ever read after a tipoff from my english teacher.

Frogm@n henry (Frogm@n henry), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 08:05 (seventeen years ago) link

??

ZapHershElhoff?

there to preserve disorder (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 08:25 (seventeen years ago) link

I've never given or received a book on a date, only after the relationship has already been established. Is this common practice? Maybe it's because I tend to date the happy-go-lucky hippie types instead of goths or poets.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 08:39 (seventeen years ago) link

In my case it would be difficult for a man to really guess what I liked unless he had ever been in my house. It's hard to explain your love of the British navy of the Nelson era and accounts of whaling ships being stove in by whales to people you don't know very well.

accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 08:51 (seventeen years ago) link

I remember one time I visited the flat of a potential love interest, and noticed she had a few books on astrology and one about auras. It didn't completely kill the interest, but it was kinda bummer.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 08:51 (seventeen years ago) link

Perhaps my dislike for astrology-believers is heightened because a former girlfriend once told me we don't really fit together since we have the same sign.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 08:54 (seventeen years ago) link

Christ, fucking astrology.

Actually, the book that would annoy me most would be one of those "how to write lovely journals" books, or rather, a "how to journal" book, since it has become a verb now. Thanks! I can write on my own! I'm not a baby!

accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 09:00 (seventeen years ago) link

The only book I have given on a date was '1066 and all that' it was well received but the dating led to nothing.

Ed (dali), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 09:29 (seventeen years ago) link

I was going to give someone the master & margarita but then she went away

Subtractive Synthesis (Subtractive Synthesis), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 09:33 (seventeen years ago) link

Hrrmmm. Any gift of books from a mang is usually quite happily received - I'm just glad that they *read*!

OK, the lamest gift was an ex boyfriend who gave me two books - the Story of the Theremin and the Book of Moog - both of which were GRATE, but then a few weeks later, turned around and gave them (again) to a friend of his! Dude! WTF?

masonic boom (kate), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 11:39 (seventeen years ago) link

men in "can read" shockah.

teh_kit (g-kit), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:19 (seventeen years ago) link

It's not a question of can or can't, it's a question of do or don't.

masonic boom (kate), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:20 (seventeen years ago) link

That's just silly and sexist quelle surprise

kv_nol (kv_nol), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:23 (seventeen years ago) link

It is not sexist - I could make disparranging comments about girls that don't read, but quelle surprise, I don't date girls!

masonic boom (kate), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:24 (seventeen years ago) link

It is the same for me and girls, girls who don't read are ugly.

Ed (dali), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:24 (seventeen years ago) link

This would probably be a deal breaker even if I saw it on her shelf.


OTM
WORST BOOK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD EVER

emsk ( emsk ), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:26 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't date girls!

Again with the sexism :)

kv_nol (kv_nol), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:28 (seventeen years ago) link

Thing is, that of the meng I have dated, they have given me some quite lovely books. M gave me a book on underground tunnels of London which was AMAZING. L gave me a book on the 4 Colour Maps Problem. After the giving away books he'd already given to me debacle, J gave me books on Trilobytes and err, Lost Rivers of London. I gave him books on art and optical illusions. Our libraries were truly complimentary. S used to come back from meetings with his publisher and bring BAGFULLS of free books.

The only boy who ever gave me Anais Nin was P, and maybe that should have been a warning sign. If that wasn't, then the Houllebeque bloody well should have been!

masonic boom (kate), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:36 (seventeen years ago) link

I would give houllebecq to a girl

Subtractive Synthesis (Subtractive Synthesis), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:37 (seventeen years ago) link

best euphemism ever

Comrades, meet Tildo Durd (Scourage), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:37 (seventeen years ago) link

Stone Monkey (Stone Monkey), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:46 (seventeen years ago) link

I suspect that didn't work. Let's try again.
ihttp://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/P/184354413X.02._AA240_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Stone Monkey (Stone Monkey), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:47 (seventeen years ago) link

I got the coolest error message from that!

Stone Monkey (Stone Monkey), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 12:48 (seventeen years ago) link

that man would probably be tokyo rosemary

I have that pink cover edition SIGNED. Suprise, suprise.

tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 13:12 (seventeen years ago) link

My ex-husband lent me a copy of Harlan Ellison essays on our first date. Which impressed me as we were both high school students and I didn't know many boys who read for pleasure (and who I considered dateable).

Some dude whom I dated a couple of years back gave me a phillip roth book which was a total drag. He was such a phillip roth kind of guy it was destined not to work out. A first conversation with a guy I really crushed on was about more obscure Salinger stories, ding ding ding!

My current guy struggled throughout his childhood with dyslexia and learning disabilities so never learned to enjoy reading. After teaching many such students, I do not fault him for this and have no issues with loving a man who does not read. More room on the bookshelf for me!

Ms Misery (MsMisery), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 14:40 (seventeen years ago) link

one guy gave me the celestine prophecy, not a datey guy, just a friend. but that was the beginning of us growing apart i think. all other books anyone has given me have been hits to a greater or lesser degree, whatever the motives of the giver.

emsk ( emsk ), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 14:44 (seventeen years ago) link

For the geeky girl, being given books is like one step beyond the mixtape of Romance.

masonic boom (kate), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 14:45 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't think a guy (or at least a datey guy) has ever given me a book. Unless a Smiths comic book counts, and it probably should not.

The Many Faces of Gordon Jump (Leon), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 14:46 (seventeen years ago) link

I gave my wife a copy of Story of the Eye when we were friends. I can't say "DON'T give a love interest a copy of Story of the Eye" since it all worked out, but in hindsight it seems like an audacious move.

Nu-Edward III (edward iii), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 14:49 (seventeen years ago) link

How about this one?

http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/P/0802130127.01._SS500_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Nu-Edward III (edward iii), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 14:52 (seventeen years ago) link

Actually, the creepiest book a mang has ever given me was Damage, which is a totally creepy book all full of family dysfunction and incest. And this was given to me by my BROTHER. Shortly before a major nervous breakdown, so I tried not to read too much into it.

masonic boom (kate), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 14:54 (seventeen years ago) link

No. I have been meaning to either borrow that from the library or buy it, so I'd appreciate that gift.

Metrosexual Healing (crunkleJ), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 14:54 (seventeen years ago) link

In college one time a girl came over to my dorm, saw "Ariel" by Sylvia Plath on a stack of books and laughed a hollow laugh and said "Oh my God" and just shook her head.

Euai Kapaui (tracerhand), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 15:04 (seventeen years ago) link

Sylvia Plath gets shit on too much.

Metrosexual Healing (crunkleJ), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 15:06 (seventeen years ago) link

1 million times preferrable to Ginsberg, IMO.

Metrosexual Healing (crunkleJ), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 15:06 (seventeen years ago) link

tracer, maybe she thought you were trying to impress emo ladeez.

Ms Misery (MsMisery), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 15:10 (seventeen years ago) link

Tropic of Capricorn - Henry Miller
Henry Miller is always a bad sign. (for women)(in dating situations)
Anything by Bukowski-
Bukowski is always a bad sign. (for women) (in dating situations)

I have received both, in separate, rapidly disentegrating dating situations.

I have been given good books by men who don't want to rapidly disintegrate, or rather date me. Including "The Giving Tree" which was a very "aw, shucks!" Christmas surprise from a ne'er do well who is one of my dearest friends. Explaining him to the women whose hearts he breaks is not easy. I rely on the anecdotal evidence that, by giving me that book, he must have a heart. Just don't ask me to find it!

I still have the "Batman" comic that the rogue who broke my heart, for the very first time, gave me in passing. I was 13 - he was 20. nothing ever happened between us - I was simply in love with him. And he knew it.

Beware Bukowski in any form! And at any age!

aimurchie (aimurchie), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 15:44 (seventeen years ago) link

Hilariously!...there are at least two cover images and lots more in-text mentions of books I've worked on, on this thread. That's what I get for taking a job with such a commercial imprint, I guess.

Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 15:58 (seventeen years ago) link

The two weird stalker ladies I dated gave me Bukowski (threw stuff in drunken fits) and some sort of self-published anime fan fiction written by a friend back home (sleeping outside my dorm room door, making public threats against new girlfriend). I saw the warning signs early but I didn't bail when I should have in either case.

The Bukowski was worse than the fan fiction.

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. (Fluffy Bear Hearts Rain, Tuesday, 13 February 2007 16:02 (seventeen years ago) link

my worst ex loved bukowski and harry crewes. he was also the drunken, violent fit type. and into lines. bad, bad scene

Ms Misery (MsMisery), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 16:03 (seventeen years ago) link

ain't yr houllebecq girl

bankster (gbx), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 16:03 (seventeen years ago) link

When I started dating my girlfriend, I lent her Austerlitz by W.G. Sebald. Not sure if that was a good idea or not, but since she still hasn't gotten around to reading it, I guess there was no harm done.

o. nate (o. nate), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 16:06 (seventeen years ago) link

I'd love to get Bukowski or the Marquis de Sade (and quite a few others on this thread). Having said that, the person on the original link does have a point when she says that if given whilst saying "this really speaks to me about my life", that would be a bit of a warning sign.

I think the only things that would put me off would be utter crap - if someone buys me Harry Potter or Bridget Jones they clearly have no idea of or relation to what I'm like or interested in.

emil.y (emil.y), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:16 (seventeen years ago) link

Buying me Harry Potter would be a little bit obvious, but hardly a bad idea! Do dig a little deeper next time, though -- there's so much YA fantasy out there.

Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:18 (seventeen years ago) link

I think any Virginia Woolf would win my heart immediately.

Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:19 (seventeen years ago) link

ain't yr houllebecq girl

-- bankster (reduhnekkisssss...), February 13th, 2007.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The RealJTMod (Real JT Mod of Team Courage), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:20 (seventeen years ago) link

I thought it was funny enough.

Allyzay heard you got beat up in a club. (Allyzay Eisenschefter), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:23 (seventeen years ago) link

Is your man a sociopath?

Nu-Edward III (edward iii), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:51 (seventeen years ago) link

takebackyourheart roffle

Nu-Edward III (edward iii), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:52 (seventeen years ago) link

I would give "Tractors of the World".

jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:56 (seventeen years ago) link

Speaking of other YA fantasy options:
http://www.goldencompassmovie.com/

Nicole Kidman rocking the Aryan ice-queen look as Mrs. Coulter.

milo (milo), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 17:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Any perpetuation of the mispronunciation of that dude's name is A-OK with me.

Euai Kapaui (tracerhand), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, that link is the most depressing thing ever. Even worse than "what women don't know about men" in the Guardian. Why do I *read* these things? Argh, mine eyes, scrub my brain, please.

masonic boom (kate), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:06 (seventeen years ago) link

I gave my ex a copy of _Get on the Bus_. She seemed to enjoy it, even tho she didn't really read.

kingfish in absentia (kingfish), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:15 (seventeen years ago) link

Best book I ever got: a book of aerial photographs of NYC, all five boroughs, detailed, 150-something pages. Huge, too. I like a coffee table book as a gift.

Bodhisattva, let me take you by the hand (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:19 (seventeen years ago) link

Hollebeucq girl is hilarious. Especially since it has so many different spellings!

The initial post is what i was responding to - texts given within the first moments/days of a burgeoning relationship that just really make you go "Err..Nope."
Bukowski was almost thematic at one point in my dating life. I am not the drunk blow job giving redhead that you crave, ok? I'm the other one.
A nice guy fell in love with me because of my hair and my job. Through Robbins, "Still Life With Woodpecker (i think), he thought his purpose was to fall in love with a long-haired redheaded waitress. He gave me razor blade earrings for Christmas, and I thanked him. And then, a few years later, I ruined his wedding. But not on purpose!
The next guy fell in love with me because I slapped him before I knew him -I was drunk and hadgotten a group of people involved in hijacking a street sign to use as a battering ram - protesting the first war, the Gulf War> it is all so silly now. "No Blood for Oil!"
We ended up at my place, and i was decribing the Breughel print I had on my wall when I discovered him looking at my tits rather than the print. So I slapped him.
I, of course, have no recollection of this. So I carded him the next time I saw him, because he showed up at my bar. He thought that was pretty tough! I had no idea why. I had to card people, and I didn't like his attitude!
That's my blackout boyfriend. And Breughel boyfriend. He didn't have any books EXCEPT Bukowski. Doom!
He was extremely handsome and had a really good stereo system. And we did a lot of drugs together. Mostly acid.
he removed a nectarine pit from my vagina while tripping - I had placed it (shoved it) up there in an ill conceived moment of earth goddess hallucinations. We had eaten the nectarine.
i really shoved it up there. because I had to fake contractions to get the thing out for his finger to grab it.
It's almost like we gave birth to that nectarine pit together!
i think i should either press submit or rethink this entire post. Fuck, it's the sandbox.
I won't be puttin' that on the parenting thread!
And he didn't read good books!

aimurchie (aimurchie), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:24 (seventeen years ago) link

Hollebeucq girl is hilarious.

this is a song by J-Lo or Gwen Stefani or someone like that?

The Real Dirty Vicar (The Real Dirty Vicar), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:26 (seventeen years ago) link

this shit is bananas

Bodhisattva, let me take you by the hand (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:29 (seventeen years ago) link

he removed a nectarine pit from my vagina while tripping - I had placed it (shoved it) up there in an ill conceived moment of earth goddess hallucinations. We had eaten the nectarine.
i really shoved it up there. because I had to fake contractions to get the thing out for his finger to grab it.
It's almost like we gave birth to that nectarine pit together!

: o

unfished business (Scourage), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:29 (seventeen years ago) link

I knew I would live to regret that bad choice, I pressed submit.
What are the options when tripping with a nectarine pit in your vagina? Not many.

aimurchie (aimurchie), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:46 (seventeen years ago) link

tokyo rosemary, that is great

i hated hollebeucq (elementary particles) so much i almost started hating the friend who lent his dog-earred copy to me. we have drifted apart, tho, anyway :/

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 18:48 (seventeen years ago) link

Girl gave me The Road Not Taken.

I dumped her.

jon jonson (p.j.), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 19:01 (seventeen years ago) link

oh my god do I love Phillip Pullman. Anyone who gave me nice editions of His Dark Materials or Harry Potter would get an A++++. All of my favorite books are destroyed from overuse or missing after overeager lending.

Ms Misery (MsMisery), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 19:22 (seventeen years ago) link

Are they really coming out with Phillip Pullman movies? I am apprehensive. The "His Dark Materials" books are some of my favorite YA and SciFan novels.

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. (Fluffy Bear Hearts Rain, Tuesday, 13 February 2007 19:42 (seventeen years ago) link

I am very apprehensive about the film. But I'll withhold judgement until I see it.

Ms Misery (MsMisery), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 19:42 (seventeen years ago) link

I was once given a 1st printing of Richard Brautigan's "The Abortion."

Yup. We didn't go out anymore after that. It was a sweet gesture, but creepy in content and in various other ways too.

molly mummenschanz (molly d), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 19:44 (seventeen years ago) link

girl i'm seeing is recommending "the alchemist." guess i'm in trouble. :<

hm (modestmickey), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 20:10 (seventeen years ago) link

Once a guy tried to get me to read the first in the Drangonlance series. It did not make a great impression. But two years later we’re still together, so I must not care too much.

franny (frannyglass), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 20:57 (seventeen years ago) link

Kate, what circles do you run in that you meet so many men that don't read?

jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 21:27 (seventeen years ago) link

The impression I got from what Kate said was not that it was endemic, but that she was just glad that they do. I'm similar myself - anyone who reads more than the back of a cereal box is hott.

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 21:45 (seventeen years ago) link

Kate, what circles do you run in that you meet so many men that don't read?

-- jaymc (jmcunnin...) (webmail), February 13th, 2007 9:27 PM. (jaymc) (later) (link)

Did this really need to be asked?

Bodhisattva, let me take you by the hand (kenan), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 21:50 (seventeen years ago) link

Even books about the alien presence among us? Because that was less than hott, I tried it. XP

Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 21:50 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't begrudge a woman her weird taste in books too much but if the first thing she did was to offer me something that was meant to change me, I'd be a little offended.

rrobyn, Houellebecq is hard to digest but he's an interesting writer, if somewhat of a facile cynic.

Michael White (Miguelito), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 22:48 (seventeen years ago) link

The impression I got from what Kate said was not that it was endemic, but that she was just glad that they do.

Also, it kind of is endemic, but not necessarily just among men. I run into a lot of people of both genders who don't read. I am constantly amazed by them.

Why, just the other night, it turned out my housemate had never heard of Geoffrey Chaucer. I mean, I can understand not having read any, but never having heard of him?

accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Tuesday, 13 February 2007 23:12 (seventeen years ago) link

When I met my man he had never heard of James Joyce. I was horrified. Especially since we met while both of us worked in a bookstore.

franny (frannyglass), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 01:07 (seventeen years ago) link

Are they really coming out with Phillip Pullman movies? I am apprehensive.

me too. i LOVE the books, i saw the play twice and the first time it was GREBT, second slightly less grebt (but partly cos y'know you get attached... and the girl who played lyra was the first girl who was called "upstairs" or whatever in doctor who in the simon pegg episode so i got more attached). seriously hope they don't fuck this up - the prob is it *can* be done really well - if they can do lotr they can do anything, right - so it's inexcusable if they do an h2g2 on it.

emsk ( emsk ), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 01:19 (seventeen years ago) link

A girl I was sort of seeing gave me Heinlin's (Heinlein? Heinlen?) Stranger in a Strange Land. I read it and she wanted to talk about how she loved it--that was part of the reason I stopped calling her for a year.

Metrosexual Healing (crunkleJ), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 05:29 (seventeen years ago) link

can we rewind to this:

http://www.jimriegelphoto.com/Images/BookCover.jpg

because this is the weirdest thing i have ever seen and i must know more.

a mediocre black-and-white cookie in a cellophane wrapper (hanks1ockli), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 06:00 (seventeen years ago) link

kinda mundane compared to some of the others on this thread, but this one never fails to kill the fuck-want (among normal people, anyway):

http://www.campaignleadership.com/blogger/uploaded_images/200px-Atlas_shrugged_cover-732433.jpg

Eisbär (Eisbär), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 06:02 (seventeen years ago) link

i wouldn't say no to a guy who gave me the tom of finland book

jo ga11ucci electrix (joseph), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 06:12 (seventeen years ago) link

books I would like to get from a guy include atlases and old golden guides

emily simpson (emilys.), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 06:16 (seventeen years ago) link

rrobyn, Houellebecq is hard to digest but he's an interesting writer, if somewhat of a facile cynic.

yeah, even though parts of the story and some of the writing were compelling, the facile cynic part killed it for me. esp the facile part. i think i would've been into it when i was 17 though.

ok i decided that most books as gifts are going to fly with me, somehow, but if a guy gave me a card or notebook or godforbid a framed picture of, like, a black and white photo of two little kids in hobo outfits kissing and holding a hand-coloured red balloon or some crap, well, then no more dates.

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 06:18 (seventeen years ago) link

a b+w white photo of two ACTUAL hobos kissing, on the other hand...

jo ga11ucci electrix (joseph), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 06:21 (seventeen years ago) link

wedding bells!

impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 06:23 (seventeen years ago) link

A girl I was sort of seeing gave me Heinlin's (Heinlein? Heinlen?) Stranger in a Strange Land. I read it and she wanted to talk about how she loved it--that was part of the reason I stopped calling her for a year.

This would annoy me with almost any book. Book club or relationship, not both.

accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 08:09 (seventeen years ago) link

(Hitchhikers movie >>>> the Philip Pullman books)

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:08 (seventeen years ago) link

HA HA HA!

Srsly Andrew, that's mental talk.

accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:29 (seventeen years ago) link

Well Hitch-hikers books better than Pullman books obviously, but the film was great by means of being faithful in a hitchhikers sense (IE reworked for the medium) rather that LotR's dull "everything in the book, exactly as you imagined it" (not entirely true, but truer as the films went on).

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:37 (seventeen years ago) link

Kate, what circles do you run in that you meet so many men that don't read?

A lot of the sort of rock boys I used to date just didn't read. They'd read magazines, but not books, and certainly never novels. (that said, some rock boys are literate, but I was surprised by how many aren't.)

Also, office people. I work with a lot of people in IT or accountancy. I swear to god, the last bloke I dated, he owned five books - 2 of which were Grisham and 2 Dan Brown. He simply did not read. I could not get my head around it.

My girlfriend in high school was forced to keep her books out of sight because her mother thought they were "messy". They watched TV in her family - even her sci fi/fantasy books were viewed with suspicion.

I kind of take it for granted that people read, because that's the kind of family I come from, and the kind of people that I have for friends. But there are lots of people that simply do not.

It's hard not to make it sound like a value judgement or snobbery, but honestly these people's way of thinking and worldview is so far removed from mine that I've learned not to even contemplate a relationship with someone who doesn't read voraciously. It just doesn't work, it's like you're speaking different languages.

And - again, this is my opinion, not a value judgement - I would never date someone whose only reading material was bestseller standards. I mean, it's one thing to read Harry Potter or Dan Brown as a supplement to a well-rounded reading diet, but quite another if that is the only thing a person reads.

masonic boom (kate), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:42 (seventeen years ago) link

!!! IT people are sterotypical bookreaders, certainly most of the ones I know are considerably above average.

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:46 (seventeen years ago) link

(Hitchhikers movie >>>> the Philip Pullman books)

-- Andrew Farrell (afarrel...), February 14th, 2007. (afarrell) (later)

HA HA HA!

Srsly Andrew, that's mental talk.

-- accentmonkey (tris...), February 14th, 2007. (accentmonkey) (later)

yeah, really! there's something misaligned in your head/soul, my friend.

emsk ( emsk ), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:50 (seventeen years ago) link

"In IT" can mean many varying things. Sometimes it means "geeks" who yes, are natural readers. But not all of them. Some are just dull technical fellows with no imagination.

(Hrrmm, now that is one of my biases - I automatically equate "not reading" with "no imagination".)

masonic boom (kate), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:51 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't really read fiction, these days I finish around 1-5 novels a year. On the other hand, I read a lot of academic books and non-fiction (around 2-4 books a month) plus comics. Maybe that explains why I find this book-as-a-date-gift thing weird, I mean, how many girls would find a Judith Butler or a Chandra Talpade Mohanty romantic?

Tuomas (Tuomas), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:56 (seventeen years ago) link

Tuomas, maybe this itself says something about your worldview, that you view 1 to 5 novels a year "not really reading" when I know people who probably haven't read 5 novels in their *life*. (Outside of school.)

masonic boom (kate), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 11:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, but most people I know (including the ones I've dated) seem to read at least a novel a month.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:03 (seventeen years ago) link

It's possible that it says something about both your worldviews.

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:05 (seventeen years ago) link

That's because you mainly date women; women read more fiction, men more non-fiction. I have to tear myself away from whatever weighty tome I happen to be reading to enter the frivolities of fiction.

Ed (dali), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:06 (seventeen years ago) link

Belay that - I read almost exclusively fiction.

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:09 (seventeen years ago) link

I have nothing against fiction, I just feel I don't have the time to delve into it, because it takes more concentration and effort. You can read comics or non-fiction books while riding the bus and listening to music.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:10 (seventeen years ago) link

OK, novels is a red herring. Even "1 to 5 BOOKS, fullstop" would be a lot for some of the people I've known.

masonic boom (kate), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:14 (seventeen years ago) link

I used to read lots, average a book a week, then for some unknown reason I just stopped for ages. I just haven't been able to get back into the habit of reading books. I just read the free papers to and from work. I think the only books I've read so far this year have been about music, so they don't really count. I've been carrying around Slaughterhouse 5 by Kurt Vonnegut in my coat pocket for 2 months and only read half of it.

I think the only books that could actually put me off someone if they were given to me would be extreme right-wing politics. I don't think I would dump someone just because they had different taste in fiction.

Colonel Poo (Colonel Poo), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:16 (seventeen years ago) link

Extreme right-wing politics? Oh, my brother used to give me those, too. Ha! And I'm not talking your Ann Coulter crap, I'm talking the philosopical ones that actually *meant it*.

masonic boom (kate), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:18 (seventeen years ago) link

Richard Kaplan type stuff? I have one of his at home, for research purposes. But stuff I won't hate keeps getting higher priority.

Cycling has kind of killed my bookreading - it should in theory get me home in time to get an hours reading in at the evening, but it never seems to work like that.

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 12:22 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm amused at how Kate is having to defend a position here that is simply a fact, and that fact is that a lot of people do not read books.

For example, many of the people in Mister Monkey's office do not read books or appear to engage in much culture beyond the internet and computer games in any way at all. And even, Andrew, a lot of the people we both know from the Place You Used to Work are not readers. As an example, I offer you the case of our friend C, who now runs his own company. He only reads books like "How to Maximize your Money" or else textbooks. My old friend Stephen C is the same. It's just how things are.


accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 13:25 (seventeen years ago) link

There's more to life than the internet, I know, but not much more.

Is this our friend C who's now worked in two jobs with Mister Monkey? I didn't know he has his own company, but I'm not surprised. He's got a missus who does all the reading, no?

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 13:44 (seventeen years ago) link

Jesse, who gave you Stranger in a Strange Land?

Framed black and white photos of two hobo children kissing made me think of this:

http://ec3.images-amazon.com/images/P/0740735403.01._BO2,204,203

It's not so much that I would dislike someone who liked this book as I would dislike someone who was so dim as to have ever spoken one word to me and yet still somehow think that I would like this book.

Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 14:08 (seventeen years ago) link

BOOOOO. I meant:

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/1559120177.01._AA240_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 14:09 (seventeen years ago) link

I would dislike someone who gave me any Ayn Rand, though.

Handgun O. Mendocino (pullapartgirl), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 14:10 (seventeen years ago) link

Is this our friend C who's now worked in two jobs with Mister Monkey?

That is the very chap.

Anne Geddes wants kicking.

accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Wednesday, 14 February 2007 14:11 (seventeen years ago) link


You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.