ILNFL sandbox thread, because you shouldn't pass up a chance to LOL @ the NY Giants

http://www.profootballtalk.com/VickFinger.jpg

All studio pre/post game types are beyond awful. That fake male joshing/bonding thing is completely irritating.

so did coughlin almost poop himself when kiwanuka let go of vince young yesterday? wtf happened there?

LOL

actually keeping it here would be ok. if ilx sandbox remains up and running i'd almost prefer to stay here rather than moving to nu-ilx.

the problems with keeping on ilx is that i hate it but we can do that too.

also dudes I have no idea wtf Kiwanuka was doing, though I will say A) it was insane B) I directly blame the NFL's "Don't Look At The QB, Ever, Lest You Injure His Delicate Persona" rules for this kind of thing C) in no way does B supercede A in this case. I loooooove how Coughlin came out screaming about Eli--yeah, the dude made a massive error in judgement but he isn't the dude that didn't bother to get a depth chart on defense nor was he the dude that decided he just wanted to give Vince Young a little hug. Also, hello, you're a fucking coach, stop being a 13 year old girl and causing catfights in your own locker room with your bullshit crybaby nonsense.

I wish a team had the nerve to fire a bitch right in the middle of a season, because that's what Coughlin deserves.

that Giants game was insane. poor Eli.

that's what i was thinking. i only saw a clip on george michael's sports machine last night and had the tv muted as i was listening to records and i thought maybe kiwanuka thought he had him in the grasp and didn't want to get flagged? because it looked like after the play he looked at the ref then did an "oh shit" double take and started chasing after young again. so i was thinking maybe he thought he heard a whistle or something because otherwise the only excuse he has is that he suffered a mini-stroke that temporarily stopped the flow of blood to his brain and resulted in weakness in him arms and legs.

by the way, pats turned the ball over 5 times AND STILL WON. that was great.

yes, jay silverheels did teach me english. thanks for asking.

With Kiwanuka, I was wondering if he heard a whistle too (THANKS douchebags who bring whistles to stadiums--any reason why this isn't an ejectable offense yet in these stadiums?), OR if he thought Young had already pitched the ball and realized his error too late. EITHER WAY, wtf, thanks Kiwanuka for that one.

Do we even know if Stet's going to keep the sandbox around after ILX3 is up and running smoothly?

i only saw a clip on george michael's sports machine last night

How is that old corroded turd still alive?

i don't know but seeing as i'm without cable i'm glad he is.
he also now co-hosts it with a rotating selection of sportsladies who run the gammut from trollopy to downright minxy.

what's gonna happen to the machine?

I don't think Coughlin is mean, he just is a dick who seems to have no idea wtf he is doing anymore. He doesn't seem to be exactly commanding respect from this group at all.

xpost haha re sportsladies

ihttp://espn-i.starwave.com/media/apphoto/c069e0eb-4449-40bb-8ad4-1a29e25979ba.jpg

I don't really mind where ilnfl is.

Kornheiser, get a holt of yourself!

otm

lol I loved when addai was being interviewed after the game and was asked if he knew that he was the first Colt since Eric Dickerson to score 4 TDs in one game and he just said "uh no" in the most disinterested voice possible.

The NFL just needs to start putting freaking flags on QB's. I know that guy from the Giants let him go figuring that if he even knocked him down they would give the Titans 15 yards and a first down.

Who gets put on the bench or run out on a rail first, Vick or Eli? Vick has had a couple of more shots, so I figure he might be the first to go. I figure MV will get sent to the Oakland penal colony sometime next spring, probably traded for Randy Moss. Eli will probably get a hang nail and then the Hefty Lefty will somehow guide the Gmen to the playoffs. Lorenzen is destined to become some kind of freak football folk hero and next week against Dallas is as good a time as any to start.

You know that Peyton has all of those NYG games tivo'ed and probably sits and goes into a spazmotic fit watching his lil' brother play like such a freaking dork. I bet Peyton has already broken a couple of remote controls throwing the thing across the room when Eli does something stupid.

Brees dropped 500+ two weeks ago against the Bengals. That guy has put up some numbers down in NOLA.

If there's half a brain in the Giants' front office, they will throw every penny they have at Jeff Fisher this offseason.

plummer benched!

vanderdrunkjerk cut! and replaced with A GRAMATTICA!!!!!!!!!!!

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=11375667

Even if Mora gets axed, he will probably get another shot at being a head coach down the line.

Ocho Cinco has something like 2000 yards in the past two games or something.

I think that crazy old geezer Bud that owns the Titans might try and keep Fisher around. Tennessee does seem to be improving on both sides of the ball. The money would be top shelf, but I wouldn't want to try and coach the Giants. I think for any coach in about any sport, being in NY is only kind on the pocketbook and it sucks for pretty much everything else.

The Eagles D has hit the bottom, they are big suxors. It is easy to laugh at Garcia being the Eagles QB, but other than that turnover for a TD after the game was lost, he didn't play that bad. Granted everyone that plays the Colts throws for 60% completions and runs for a buck twenty five on the ground (if not buck sixty).

I've got to wonder if Gibbs will be back next year. It hasn't worked and I figure he will take some front office gig "director of football operations" and someone else will be the head coach. Knowing their owner, freaking Bobby Bowden will probably be coaching there next year.

I will always like Jim Plunkett other than the fact he won me my only $100 bet in that he was the starting QB for both of those Tom Flores Raider championship clubs.

"marcus allen's not as good as bo jackson/that's probably something he would dispute"

also, he's refusing to talk during plays because he "hates when celebrities do that". omg <3

Bud's already backing the GM I thought. And Fisher:GM as cats:dogs etc.

btw, do I have to reregister? fauxILX doesn't seem to like my login...

Nothing is as weird as Fox using Fugazi's "Waiting Room" on Thanksgiving underneath advertising the Cowboys vs. the Giants for the next week.

I take it back. TIME TO RETIRE, BRETT.

because they both peaked around 1995?

I am at the point where I don't think I will ever forgive the Giants for passing up Lovie for Coughlin. What the hell.

Also that roughing the passer call pro-Hasselbeck last night made me really honestly wish some GB mofo would've rushed up and just flat out killed him. I mean, yeah, I guess the call wasn't Hassy's fault but that'd sure as shit shut up those obnoxious "fans" they have up there. See also: my complaint yesterday about whistles in stadium should be a capital crime.

and you were calling me a crazy person for asking them to hire mariucci last week!

gahahalksha also did you guys hear about Michael irvin pulling a jimmy the greek? he is the most entertaining man in the history of football.

xp

http://www.cbn.com/imagescc/reggiewhite4.jpg

We always should look at the situation and ask ourselves a question. Why did God create us differently? Why did God make me black and you white? Why did God make the next guy Korean and the next guy Asian and the other guy Hispanic? Why did God create the Indians?

Well, it's interesting to me to know why now. When you look at the black race, black people are very gifted in what we call worship and celebration. A lot of us like to dance, and if you go to black churches, you see people jumping up and down, because they really get into it.

White people were blessed with the gift of structure and organization. You guys do a good job of building businesses and things of that nature and you know how to tap into money pretty much better than a lot of people do around the world.

Hispanics are gifted in family structure. You can see a Hispanic person and they can put 20 or 30 people in one home. They were gifted in the family structure.

When you look at the Asians, the Asian is very gifted in creation, creativity and inventions. If you go to Japan or any Asian country, they can turn a television into a watch. They're very creative.

And you look at the Indians, they have been very gifted in the spirituality.

http://my.execpc.com/~dross/aw/regwhite.html

i really can't stress enough how funny the michael irvin thing is, you have to hear the audio if you haven't already. he starts cracking himself up halfway into it a la GWB. i think the most shocking thing was his assertion that romo is such a magnificent athlete, but I'm sure he'd have a difft opinion if he wasn't a Cowboy.

you are obviously on drugs. yes, put in the qb who couldn't win the job in camp, hasn't played all year, and put him in against the 2nd rated defense in the nfl. that would make complete sense.

Well, wait a second, I mean saying "anything is better" doesn't mean that that is still not completely batshit insane.

xpost that is actually true, Dan. As a halfer, I am more comfortable with only about 10 people living with me at one time, though.

hahaha what.

xp

I remember watching the show, real popular show, Touched by an Angel, and I remember the angel lost her powers. And the reason she lost her powers is she was trying to help a drug dealer and she lost her powers there and they thought she was dealing drugs. But they took her to court and the judge started asking her questions, and so she asked the judge a question, why is it that when we talk to God we call it praying, but when God talks to us they call us crazy.

So I just want you to know I'm not crazy. Okay. But in the process of knowing that -- I lost my train of thought ..... where I was going with that? Where was I going? What did I say?

And I remember going into the communities and just talking to the people and preaching to them and did it for two years, and after that two years I realized something. People are tired of being preached to.

A+++ WILL SLEEP WITH EXTENDED F@MILY @G@IN

only took two years to find that out? god i wish i could play high stakes cards with someone like that.

The stats are from www.pro-football-reference.com.

Kordell Stewart
Passing | Rushing |
+----------+-----+---------------------------------------+-----------------+
| Year TM | G | Comp Att PCT YD Y/A TD INT | Att Yards TD |
+----------+-----+---------------------------------------+-----------------+
| 1995 pit | 10 | 5 7 71.4 60 8.6 1 0 | 15 86 1 |
| 1996 pit | 16 | 11 30 36.7 100 3.3 0 2 | 39 171 5 |
| 1997 pit | 16 | 236 440 53.6 3020 6.9 21 17 | 88 476 11 |
| 1998 pit | 16 | 252 458 55.0 2560 5.6 11 18 | 81 406 2 |
| 1999 pit | 16 | 160 275 58.2 1464 5.3 6 10 | 56 258 2 |
| 2000 pit | 16 | 151 289 52.2 1860 6.4 11 8 | 78 436 7 |
| 2001 pit | 16 | 266 442 60.2 3109 7.0 14 11 | 96 537 5 |
| 2002 pit | 8 | 109 166 65.7 1155 7.0 6 6 | 43 191 2 |
| 2003 chi | 9 | 126 251 50.2 1418 5.6 7 12 | 59 290 3 |
| 2004 bal | 2 | 0 0 0.0 0 0.0 0 0 | 1 -1 0 |
| 2005 bal | 1 | 0 0 0.0 0 0.0 0 0 | 4 24 0 |
+----------+-----+---------------------------------------+-----------------+
| TOTAL | 126 | 1316 2358 55.8 14746 6.3 77 84 | 560 2874 38 |
+----------+-----+---------------------------------------+-----------------+

Michael Vick
| Passing | Rushing |
+----------+-----+---------------------------------------+-----------------+
| Year TM | G | Comp Att PCT YD Y/A TD INT | Att Yards TD |
+----------+-----+---------------------------------------+-----------------+
| 2001 atl | 8 | 50 113 44.2 785 6.9 2 3 | 29 300 1 |
| 2002 atl | 15 | 231 421 54.9 2936 7.0 16 8 | 113 777 8 |
| 2003 atl | 5 | 50 100 50.0 585 5.8 4 3 | 40 255 1 |
| 2004 atl | 15 | 181 321 56.4 2313 7.2 14 12 | 120 902 3 |
| 2005 atl | 15 | 214 387 55.3 2412 6.2 15 13 | 102 597 6 |
| 2006 atl | 11 | 150 292 51.4 1770 6.1 13 9 | 95 870 2 |
+----------+-----+---------------------------------------+-----------------+
| TOTAL | 69 | 876 1634 53.6 10801 6.6 64 48 | 499 3701 21 |
+----------+-----+---------------------------------------+-----------------+

Kordell Stewart Career

Total Games: 126
Completions: 1316
Attempts: 2358
Percentage: 55.8
Yards: 14746
Average YD: 6.3
TDs: 66
INTs: 84

Michael Vick Career

Total Games: 69
Completions: 876
Attempts: 1634
Percentage: 53.6
Yards: 10801
Average YD: 6.6
TDs: 64
INTs: 48

Vick is a better passer in TDs vs. INTs catagory, but their completion percentages/yards per completion are close. Vick is the better runner as you'd expect with a total of 3701 rushing yards vs. Stewart's 2874.

I still don't quite get wanting to pull the trigger on Grossman.
I think Chicago's problem is their play calling. The Bears got greedy after having success going deep early in the year and have gone too many times to the well. They need to get more screens working, as that could crack things open a bit more for the running game and help the deep passing game. The problem is that Grossman has is like Eli Manning and Vick in that they are inconsistent throwing the short passes.

Vick's recievers are pretty cruddy, but he also seems to do a bit of the Farve thing for throwing some balls so damn hard they freaking bounce off the players. It is funny how a month ago Vick was turning into this superhuman QB and now he is flipping off the fans. Watching how Vick carries the ball scares me far more than him throwing the ball. I looked it up and MV fumbles are actually down this year, but everytime he runs palming the ball, I cringe.

Kordell had a couple of decent years. Stewart took alot of blame for those Steelers losses that were tied to their special teams doing stupid stuff. They lost a couple of big playoff games giving up returns for TDs and fumbling the ball away in bad moments. Slash wasn't all that, but he took more than his fair share of the blame. I got to think if Stewart would have stayed as Slash/WR, he might be still in the league and could be "Hines Ward" instead of a failed QB.

the canard i've been hearing lately about his lack of touch drives me apeshit too, cuz you will seriously see guys claiming that he's hurling nolan ryan fastballs on 2 yd dumpoffs even when it's demonstrably untrue. i dont wanna turn this into a capn save a vick thread (lol too late) but none of the dudes talking shit abt him ever want to own up to what they're actually thinking: they don't like him because he has braids and wears a do-rag. actually the entire 'he guns it too hard' thing is a perfect example of this, it's like some karl rove-ish master stroke of disinformation. brett favre's been breaking receivers' fingers for his entire career and nobody ever gave him any shit over it. Things I've heard said about MV (usually by herbish white people with suspect facial hair): he's too stupid to read defenses, he's a tattooed thug, he's a bad leader. and it's not just, like, Cletus Boogityfuck saying this shit, it's people in the public eye who aren't being called on it! (white) people look at him like they do Iverson, except Vick's assumed a role on his team much more commonly held by good ol' boys. and it's not like there aren't a lot of legitimate criticisms to be made of him (ball: meet turf!) it's when people say stuff like he's TOO STUPID to read defenses (as opposed to mensa candidates dan marino and brett favre???) that they reveal what they are actually talking about.

can't argue with this tho :( also ppl forget that Vick is still 26 years old (one year older than eazy eli), so uh hey. sky's the limit!

"Stewart took alot of blame for those Steelers losses that were tied to their special teams doing stupid stuff."

haha that has been the story this year too. you could attribute most of their losses this year, besides Oakland and Baltimore, to special teams - specifically their inability to find a player, any player, who can field a punt. randle-el = the fulcrum upon which steelers success rested???

total downer.

I think the Bucs are still on their victory lap. Old Chucky is not looking too happy these days. I personally do enjoy for watching some coaches get comeuppance. I'm still ticked about that crap roughing the QB call earlier this year pretty much handing Tampa their upset of the Bengals. I wonder how many games have had these flag football on the QB calls be key plays in the final outcome?

But the kind of schemes that fit Vick's style of play don't seem to work consistently on the NFL level. Maybe the NFL game will change, but Vick may be past his prime at that point.

Argh come on, I'm getting really sick of this argument. I don't personally think he's too stupid for any of it, just incredibly bad at throwing a ball (combo of the Eli inconsistency on the short + the Favre BREAK YA FINGAS YAAAAAAAAHH thing previously mentioned, you can't do BOTH of those with a bunch of shitty receivers and have me even care about you), but ffs everyone I know who thinks Vick is terrible or stupid likes Donovan McNabb and Warren Moon. The only thing revealed by such a statement is that some people just want their QBs to be QBs, not frigging RBs. Though the idea of just putting 11 RBs out there as your offense is pretty funny :D

In fairness, he does hold every record that ever existed in the history of football. I'm not sure what that implies vis a vis intelligence cos he really does seem like a total dingbat.

The whole argument that anyone is too stupid to play QB is kind of a funny one to me, thinking about it. Montana is like the biggest advertisement for brain injury I've seen that is still walkin' and talkin' in society. The only people I can possibly even remotely think of in terms of this comparison is like, Manning or Troy Aikman? And the correct word for Manning is not "smart" but rather "obsessive compulsive bordering on Howard Hughes."

http://www.gorillamask.net/tecmobo.shtml

well, see, what a (successful) quarterback has to do is RECOGNIZE those complex blitz schemes and adjust to them on the fly. so while the defensive player has all year to learn his team's plan the opponent has a week or so. if the qb can't make those adjustments you turn into drew bledsoe. who has a more powerful arm than either manning or brady and is just as accurate but he can't recognize and decide quickly enough.

xpost I'm pretty convinced one day Tom Brady is going to turn out to actually have been a serial killer.

16) Atlanta Falcons (5-6)

It's like choosing up sides in a stickball game. On one side there's Jim Mora Sr., the coach's father, who agrees that Michael Vick is a "coach breaker." Captain of the other team is Vick himself, who shot the crowd the double-bird after he was booed. A recent entry on the Vick team is owner Arthur Blank, who told CBS's Tony Siragusa, by way of deflecting criticism from his QB, "I've got three No. 1 wide receivers and none of them can catch the ball." Then there are the TV experts such as Irvin who feel that Vick should "just be allowed to play the game," you know, as they do in the schoolyard. And on the other side, a whole bunch of stern faced types who say, no, quarterbacking is a trade to be learned, like glassblowing or metal working. Stick around. It's getting good.

32) Detroit Lions (2-9)

Someone sits in a little public address booth, giggling to himself, and when the visiting Dolphins' defense is introduced, he gets ex-Lion QBs Joey Harrington's name thrown in, to achieve the full flavor of the boos, and just to make the thing more nasty, he arranges it so that Billy Joel's "Piano Man" comes over the loud speaker. Harrington plays the piano. Now the Lions are in total denial. No one claims responsibility, of course, although the finger of guilt is being leveled at a guy called Bryan Bender, their Director of Broadcast and Production. What a team! What an operation! I wish I could move this team down to 35th spot or so.

xpost horseshoe totally OTM.

well I mean... those guys (mcnabb & moon*) are a lot less \hiphop than Vick. I think the fact that he's always wearnig white tees, do-rags, the tats, hair in braids, the way he talks, this stuff is as big a factor as the blackness. I hope I'm not making it sound like I'm admonishing ppl who aren't fans of his cuz that's not what I'm trying to do, I mean there are times when I wish he played a little more like McNabb. if you think the guy's a bum then that's cool, I have no compunction when it comes to saying that about a shitload of dudes! i just think there's a lot of racialists who use the fact that it's easy and acceptable right now to dump on his game as an excuse to say a lot of suspect things.

*moon has a hot white supermodel wife though. that's pretty gangsta.

I'm also no fan of Lord Brett trying to always force the ball into double and triple coverage. Now that's the definition of stupid.

*besides Brandon The Barbarian

Maybe I'll comapare him to Kordell and start another shitstorm from rabid Burgh fans.

If I keep it up I'm well on the way to becoming the Geir Hongro of ilnfl.

As a Pittsburgh fan I'm obligated to hate the Ravens. It's been harder this year because I really do like McNair. After the way he was chucked out of Tennessee he deserves a shot at the Superbowl. Since the Steelers have thrown their chances away I'm rooting for the Saints as the sentimental favorites.

FOLLOW ME! FOLLOW ME TO FREEDOM!

Squatter known as Punk Rock Mike outside Bat Cave, building near Gowanus Canal he shares with dozens of people.

"btw did you see the p. manning rainman moment during the last game? he's at the line and starts audibling and then realizes he SCREWED UP.

i.e.

"CHECK! Red-36, Blue-14, Ohio-3....checkcheckcheckcheckchek... BLUE-36, RED-14, OMAHA-4..."

and he has his EYES CLOSED AND IS POINTING IN THE AIR LIKE HE'S READING ALONG IN A BOOK"

I'd like to move ILNFL, very much yes. I think the name should also be changed, in that case?

also yes I love how much venom he said GARBAGE TOUCHDOWN with. i was SOFA KING bummed when that td happened. collinsworth = world class dbag, but also a very good analyst. so. gumbel constantly saying "turned over on downs" when teams were PUNTING kinda drove me cuhrayzee tho. i thought as a production it was pretty awesome just for all the things it DIDN'T do, it was so not-shrill except for deion and he is hilar so that's fine with me.

The funniest was how Collinsworth was yammering on and on for like 7 hours about how special teams onside kicks hands teams blahblahblah is like scarier than the frigging Blair Witch or something, and then duder comes on the field and just "onside kicks" the thing straight into Cincy hands, literally. WTF!!

http://www.roosterteethvideos.com/EA_Sports/DallasClark/director.htm

my 3 fantasy league QBs are eli manning, jeff garcia, and david garrard (who replaced byron leftwich for JAX) -- which of them should i start?!?

i would have done the same thing, tho...

"Why don't NFL players snap all the snaps on their chinstraps? Someday somebody's chinstrap is going to get snapped to somebody else's helmet during a tackle, and there's going to be a chinstrap related broken neck. Don't be surprised if it happens -- I know I won't.

"And speaking of football, y'ever noticed Mike Shanahan's mouth? He looks like he has the worst-fitting dentures ever made. Don't be surprised if someday you see Mike Shanahan's teeth flying towards a referee someday, right behind a red flag.

"I'm Andy Rooney."

Yeah, that was really fucking hilarious, your boy Shockey standing there watching Ware ditch him to go break up the play, Shockey's POINTING at Ware in motion, waving his fucking finger like he wants the LINE JUDGE to go cut-block the guy for him, and just fucking watches him go right on by. Seriously the Giants should be allowed to have 15 people on the field, since right now only six of 'em appear to actually be playing.

Finally watched Vick play this year and I gotta admit aidsy's right. He does look much better than when I last saw him. His perfromance wasn't spectacular, but good and workmanlike. Norwood needs the ball more. He's a load.

LOL @ the Colts.

Hey, that would suck ass! Wait a Minute!
Saturdays are lame.

*twilight zone music*

btw, HOW ABOUT THOSE MOTHERFUCKING TENNESSEE TITANS? they're about one good draft away from being a pretty competetive team. bold clams: I'd bet many tall dollars that they are next year's vogue superbowl pick. also I hope they somehow make the playoffs this year and we get a Saints-Titans superbowl.

jeff garcia: FOLK HERO

i hope the sandbox is still around next year when i can triumphantly quote this post ad nauseum!!!!!!!!!

also has lawrence kansas heard about THE KOSAR wanting to coach THE U

i've never been so insanely jealous in my life.

By Greg Garber

He swivels in the power chair, furiously working his iMac mouse and keyboard, wrapped in a cocoon of mahogany and football memorabilia.

Click! Click! Click!

Here in the comfort and safety of his stately home office, set in an upscale development outside Indianapolis, Cato June is not merely a linebacker for the Colts. He is the powerful owner, shrewd general manager and X/O-savvy head coach of an NFL fantasy football team called Juneimus D Great -- a name modestly modeled on the emperors of Rome.

Cato June is the Colts' leading tackler with 106 through 12 games.On this late November day, June is not smiling. He bears the stern countenance of someone whose team is scuffling around .500 with the season winding down. At this moment, desperately seeking some receiving help -- Tap! Tap! Tap! Click! -- June is Everyfan.

An estimated 15 million to 20 million Americans play fantasy football. June is proud to be one of them. Admittedly, it makes for some awkward moments. You see, his fantasy quarterback is the Patriots' Tom Brady.

"Playing New England, I can't be happy with him throwing a TD pass, but in the back of my mind, I'm like, 'Yeah, I just got six points in my fantasy league,'" June says, laughing.

In fact, when the Colts played the Patriots on Nov. 5, June's moral compass moved him to sit Brady in his fantasy league. In the real game, however, he was rewarded with two interceptions of the former Super Bowl MVP. June isn't sure which accomplishment was better.

"I picked up [the Jaguars' David] Garrard," June says. "He happened to give me three or four touchdowns that week. I think it was a great GM move by myself."

Fantasy football has exploded into a billion-dollar business. You can find tips everywhere, including the various platforms of the Worldwide Leader in Sports. The premise is simple: Fans build teams by drafting NFL players, who acquire points for recording a variety of statistics. Games are played head to head and, like the NFL, the good teams advance to the playoffs. Depending on the league, the stakes can be quite low -- or dizzyingly high.

As a public service, we should mention that while the NFL has specific rules prohibiting almost everything else, there is nothing in the rulebook that forbids its players from playing fantasy football. While June is one of the few NFL players who admits he plays fantasy football, the phenomenon affects the reality of many in the league. It has become an accepted (and sometimes annoying) part of the game.

"In a game solely designed around the team concept, it's nice to have some individual recognition every now and then," Giants running back Tiki Barber said. "Fantasy football does that.

"It's already the most popular sport, but it's a way for people to delve into the sport and get to know the individual players, which they probably wouldn't have an opportunity to do otherwise."

As Eagles kicker David Akers discovered a few years ago.

"When it first started, I was a little naive on this stuff," Akers said, laughing. "A guy came up to me and said, 'You're my fantasy kicker,' and I'm like, 'Dude, what are you talking about? Maybe I shouldn't be hanging out with you.'"

For most of us, fantasy football is a way to get closer to the real thing. For June, it's something that helps get him farther away.

"It's to get away from reality," June says. "You go into your fantasy world and you put your GM hat on. You take your football cleats off and you try to simulate what it would be like to have your own team.

"It's kind of like the same thing as when you're out there on the field; you really don't know what to expect. You're hoping and wishing that your players play up to a certain potential so that your team can be successful."

Insider trading alert

With no disrespect to ESPN.com's esteemed Eric Karabell (and the cottage industry that fantasy football has become), here are a few pieces of advice from some true insiders, NFL players who play on both fields -- fantasy and reality:

"I think good running backs are a big part of fantasy points," said Redskins tight end Chris Cooley. "They're a position that's hard to get consistent points from week to week. That helped me a lot."

Colts linebacker Cato June's advice is simple: be clear-headed and unsentimental. In a word, ruthless.

"Yards mean nothing," June said. "Catches mean nothing. It's all about touchdowns, guys who get in the end zone. That's who you want.

"There's no loyalty in the fantasy world. I'm sorry, this is your favorite team, this is your favorite player? There is no loyalty if you want to win."

June, it should be noted, doesn't always take his own advice. He regularly plays Colts receiver Reggie Wayne and tight end Dallas Clark. Of course, with Peyton Manning throwing to them, they are regulars in the end zone.

The same is not true of former teammate Edgerrin James, who has struggled running the ball in Arizona.

"Edge is my main man," June said. "I was hoping he'd have a better turnout this year."

Information is power. Good fantasy information is, of course, priceless.

Even Broncos head coach Mike Shanahan, who has two Super Bowl rings, is not immune to those who seek it.

"I had my nephew here as my ball boy," Shanahan said during training camp. "He said he had already picked [rookie running back] Mike Bell in his fantasy league -- and that was before he was [named] a starter, so he had a little inside information there."

Shanahan's son Kyle is wide receivers coach of the Houston Texans.

"We talk personnel all the time," Mike said. "He's got friends, and when they're over at the house, they're always trying to pick his brain about the personnel. They want to get a jump in that fantasy league. [People] never really say they're really asking me a question about fantasy football, but I think you kind of learn that's why they're asking me the question."

Titans head coach Jeff Fisher hosts a popular weekly radio show.

"People will ask, 'How's so-and-so doing?' They'll even ask questions about players around the league," Fisher said. "They come out of left field, but you know what the basis for the question is. It's a fantasy football question."

Many of the football folks interviewed for this story described similar experiences.

"I have some old friends who are trainers and some buddies," Broncos quarterback Jake Plummer said. "I give them a tip every once in awhile. I think the best one was when Reuben Droughns started for us and no one knew he was going to start.

"He started him, and everyone was mad because he got the inside scoop. Reuben went off for 170 yards, something like that."

Said Giants defensive end Michael Strahan, "The only way it affects my life is if I'm eating dinner and some guy comes up and he either says I did good or bad for him that week.

"Other than that, I don't think about fantasy football. I'm out here trying to win the real football game."

(Way) over the top

With 26 TDs already this season, LaDainian Tomlinson is easily fantasy football's top performer.In recent years, the Colts' Peyton Manning has been the most successful fantasy quarterback. Through the first eight seasons of his career, he averaged better than 30 touchdown passes per season.

Even that kind of track record isn't enough to keep the most aggressive fans of fantasy happy.

"Besides, 'Hey, Peyton, can I have your autograph?' it's 'Hey, we need more fantasy touchdowns out of you,'" Manning said.

After he scored rare rushing touchdowns in back-to-back games against the Jaguars and Jets, Manning joked, "I'm just trying to keep the fantasy people happy."

Broncos wide receiver Javon Walker has also felt pressure from fantasy fanatics.

"'We need some touchdowns this week,'" Walker said. "Whenever they tell me that, I am like, 'Shoot, I need some touchdowns, too. If it can come as easy as you say it, then so be it.' "

Said Giants quarterback Eli Manning, "Guys come up and say, 'I need you to throw about four touchdowns this week -- I've got you in fantasy.'"

"You get letters," said Ravens place-kicker Matt Stover, who has been kicking since 1991. "They say, 'Hey, man, you've got to kick well this week, and I will win the Super Bowl.'

"You are really more conncted with the fans. They follow you more. I think it is an ingenious idea, because it wasn't really in existence when I got in the league."

The ultimate scoring machine

With 22 TD passes and 3,315 yards, Peyton Manning is currently the top fantasy quarterback.Chargers running back LaDainian Tomlinson, as you might imagine, hears this stuff all the time.

"LT, I need 150 yards, I need three touchdowns this week," Tomlinson said. "It's difficult to go out and get 150 yards and three touchdowns every week.

"Please ... like I have control over it."

Maybe it just seems that way.

Through 12 games, Tomlinson has scored 26 touchdowns; he needs three in his last four regular-season games to break Shaun Alexander's record of 28, set last season. Including his two passing TDs, Tomlinson is on pace to produce the greatest fantasy season ever for a running back and perhaps the best fantasy season ever, challenging the monumental previous efforts of Jerry Rice and Marshall Faulk.

All this is from the guy who was only the No. 3 pick in most fantasy drafts, behind Alexander and the Chiefs' Larry Johnson.

"If you are the No. 1 draft pick in fantasy football, or if you're No. 2 or 3, you take pride and want to uphold that honor that someone has drafted you that high," Tomlinson said, breaking into a smile.

"But at the same time, it's not something you go into a game saying, 'OK, I've got to really make sure my fantasy owners are happy after this game.' You know what I mean?"

Cooley KOs his fantasy team

Chris Cooley was a fairly typical kid growing up in Utah. He was all-state at Logan High School, playing tight end and defensive end. He also played fantasy football.

Chris Cooley leads the Redskins in TD receptions with five."I always had a league with a bunch of friends in high school, and we always had a blast with it," Cooley said. "Got together and drafted -- it's something I've always done."

He continued to play fantasy football at Utah State and today, at 24 and tight end for the Washington Redskins, he still plays fantasy, although he might be playing a little out of his league.

"Right now, I have a league with my girlfriend's family," Cooley said. "You can trash-talk with the people you know. I've been scoring the most points every week, and I end up playing my girlfriend and we post back and forth on the Internet."

For a tight end, Cooley has scored his share of touchdowns in three NFL seasons. He had 13 in his first two seasons, and in Week 12 his 66-yard catch late in the fourth quarter gave the Redskins a 17-13 victory over the Carolina Panthers. It was his fifth score of the season.

Cooley began the season with a team heavily stocked with Philadelphia Eagles -- quarterback Donovan McNabb, wide receiver Donte Stallworth and the Eagles' defense. Cooley does not, as a rule, play himself on his own team.

Last season, this hurt him badly. Cooley's greatest day as a professional knocked his fantasy team out of the playoffs.

"I scored three touchdowns against the Cowboys," Cooley said, "and I ended up beating my own team because of myself. I was way more happy about the game. I could really care less.

"It's fun to play the fantasy, but I'd trade three touchdowns any day."

Shifting priorities

Most players interviewed for this story said they believe fantasy football is ultimately good for the game because it creates more fan interest. Several, however, see a downside.

Plummer was among them.

Broncos quarterback Jake Plummer isn't a big fan of fantasy football."I think it's ruined the game, actually," said Plummer, recently replaced as starter by rookie Jay Cutler. "There are no true fans anymore, because if I lose a game I come out of Invesco Field and there's not a Denver fan mad that I lost, but happy because I threw three TDs. When I was growing up, I was a fan of my team, not the points I'm getting.

"It's kind of unnerving to me because you're like, 'We didn't win, but you're happy.' That's not right, because I'm not happy. I don't care if I throw five TDs if we lose. It's all about getting the win."

According to the players, fantasy point totals are becoming as important as final numbers on the scoreboard.

"The last three or four years, that's all they care about," Rams quarterback Marc Bulger said of fantasy football fans. "They come up to you: 'Ah, you lost, [but] you still threw for 300. Great job, I got you this week.'

"I'm more worried about sometimes dealing with people [about fantasy] than I am if we won or lost. Because if you throw for 200 yards, no touchdowns and win, people are more mad at you."

Said Barber, "All they care about is whether I get 150 yards and two touchdowns, whereas all I care about is whether or not we win. So there's an incongruity in the wants."

Peyton Manning described a typical conversation with a fan:

"Hey, great game last week."

"Yeah, but we lost."

"But you threw five touchdowns, and that's all I need from you."

Juneimus D not so great

Cato June didn't draft high enough to make Manning his fantasy quarterback.

June is a fine player on a terrific team, but the fantasy season is not going particularly well. June's team, Juneimus D Great, is idling along around .500. Skill, to put it bluntly, has been lacking.

June's brother Omari -- who is not an NFL linebacker -- is ruling this league of family and friends with his team, O June. According to Cato, there is only one reason for this disturbing development.

"Mr. LaDainian Tomlinson," June said, shaking his head. "It's unfair. It's not fair that LaDainian Tomlinson can single-handedly beat teams by himself. I think he needs to get half of the points, because he's been killing everybody."

June has been getting modest production from Bengals kicker Shayne Graham and Vikings running back Chester Taylor, but Vikings wide receiver Marcus Robinson and Redskins multipurpose player Antwaan Randle El haven't worked out.

Brady, on the other hand, has been more than adequate.

"It's a love-hate thing for Tom Brady," said June, who played at Michigan, as did Brady. "He plays for the Patriots, and we have our thing with them. But at the same time, he's from Michigan. He gives me fantasy points, so I can't be mad at him."

June, like all fantasy fans, is feeling a win this coming Sunday.

"I'm going to come back," he said. "I can see it. It's all possible. That's why it's fantasy. That's why you play.

"If you knew you were going to win, it wouldn't be any fun playing."

^_______^

OBVIOUSLY, ASSHOLE ; (

which two do i start?

i am kinda leaning toward joey and brett.

I think a big reason Tennessee's defense is looking better is that their offense is not constantly going three and out like they did with Collins at the beginning of the year. The Titans looked like the worse team in football back in September. I'd like to see what their defensive stats would rank in the last six games or so. Overall for the season they are still at the bottom of the pack, but they got absolutely destroyed by Dallas (w/Bledsoe) and the Chargers in the first month.

I kind of feel for Lovie Smith, either way he goes unless they get a Superbowl birth it will be bad. As bad as Grossman has played, the Bears are still 4th in the NFL in total scoring. I'd have to stay put, as the Bears have been playing pretty good defensive clubs for the last few weeks. They have already clinched the division and have a couple of gomer games with the Rams and Bucs. I'd let it ride for another game and a 1/2 before making that call. Of course, going to a vet like Griese is not quite the same as the Broncos going with Cutler. I'd hope that Griese would be ready to go. I think anything less than a Superbowl birth is going to be a let down for Chicago.

you aren't? are you a colts fan?? how can you not be delighted by this underdog success story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tho i wouldn't be shocked if they got killed by the texans next week. but yeah, having a miserable offense does a lot to make life harder for your defense, especially since you often end up giving them bad field position to work with. this is where it becomes apparent how terrifyingly good Chicago's special teams are - if something happened to the defense, I think their STs would be good enough to win them a couple games by itself. anyway i'm not a big football outsiders fan, but they had some interesting stuff on how TEN killed the colts this week:

"The Colts are disadvantaged in their quest to blow teams out because of tempo. Our main statistics, DVOA and DPAR, are based on measuring each individual play compared to the league average. Plays are successful or not based on advancing toward a first down or touchdown. By that measure, the Colts rank first in the league in offense. Conventional statistics, both yards and points, rank the Colts third.

A reason for the mild discrepancy is that the Colts simply do not have the ball as often as other teams. Going into last week’s games, the Colts had eleven fewer possessions than any other team, the equivalent of a full game’s worth of opportunities. On a per possession basis, the Colts average the most yards, the most points, and the fewest punts. The difference in yards between them and second place New Orleans was larger than the difference between New Orleans and 12th place Denver.

Indianapolis gets fewer possessions in part because of their defense’s design. The Colts are built to get the opposition into obvious passing downs. Ideally, this happens when the Colts grab a big lead, as was the case last year. In close games, they rely on making a big play on first or second down and getting the team into third-and-long. The defense focuses on keeping most plays in front of them, requiring their opposition to put together a string of successful plays. Inevitably, a run defense even as bad as the Colts’ will make a stop for no gain.

Also, the more plays the opposition runs, the higher the chances for a turnover. The Colts rank 10th overall in turnovers created, but they rank third in turnovers created per opponents drive.

The Colts would prefer to score quickly, but opposing defenses have adopted the same strategy as the Indianapolis defense. If your personnel are overmatched, prevent the big play and hope to make one big play yourself. The Titans were not perfect at this, giving up two big completions to Marvin Harrison, but they were good enough.

This resulting combination of offensive efficiency, a bend but don’t break defensive philosophy, poor rushing defense, and cautious opposition dramatically limits possessions. The Colts have the longest average drives in terms of plays and time of possession on both offense and defense. Fewer possessions magnify any offensive mistake the Colts make.

A week ago, Philadelphia took this strategy to the extreme by playing exclusively a nickel defense. The Colts responded by gashing them with Joseph Addai. This week, the Titans adopted a cautious defense, but thanks to their athletic linebackers, they were able to play most downs in a base 4-3 defense.

The Colts tried to run through this defense as well, but the Titans were able to control the Indianapolis ground game. Addai and Dominic Rhodes were limited to 95 yards on 28 carries. The Tennessee run defense stiffened considerably in the second half when it allowed 12 yards on 10 running back carries. Peyton Manning is oft criticized for padding his own stats, but at least on Sunday, he should have thrown the ball more often.

The defensive line did its job by preventing the Colts linemen from getting to the second level, but the plays were made by the linebackers. Keith Bulluck, Peter Sirmon, and David Thornton were all over the field. The play of Thornton, in particular, was noteworthy since he left Indianapolis as a free agent. Thornton was never made an offer by the Colts, so he must be pleased on some level to see the run defense struggling without him.

The linebackers were able to stay on the field to stop the run because they excel in pass defense. They played in coverage on a number of plays, and only once, on a pass to Bryan Fletcher, did they give up a big play. Meanwhile, Manning’s first interception came when Thornton whacked Marvin Harrison, forcing the ball loose and into the hands of Sirmon. The second interception came on a great individual play by Bulluck, who read Manning the whole way and made a perfect play on a pass intended for Fletcher."

Reading the paper today, where every move kosar makes is recorded, koachar wants U of M to create a special position for him to oversee the football program. The dude has been insane now for several years. We are seeing the results.

Also, I predict a mention of Derek Andersons big feet within three minutes of cleveland having the ball.

* this is my approximation of how Adam Schefter inappropriately SHOUTS the subjects of his statements.

The Colts defense is soooo poor. They don't give up the big plays like they were prone to under Mora, but teams complete like 60% of their passes and run rampent over them. They are not getting the turnovers or sacks like they did the past couple of years. That speed and agression is also being used against them as teams will kill them sometimes on trap plays.

Bernie's sounding more and more like some shopping bag lady.

pathetic.

On top of that the Browns need an o-line (LeCharles Bentley looks to be gone for next season as well) and some sort of pass rush.

I wonder how that 5-7 back Garrett Wolfe from Northern Illinois will do in the pros. Joe Morris did pretty good for the Giants back in the 80s. I've seen Parcells say that Morris' size was actually a benefit as he would get "lost" behind the linemen and then was a hard target to hit as his center of gravity was so low.

I like the games on the NFL network. At least they are only trying to sell me on watching more football instead of some crap show Fox has the announcers hawking every two downs. Collinsworth is much better at working a game than being one of those guys in a studio. Collinsworth does actually pick up some pretty good game situation obervations. Anything is better than that MNF abomination crew, if you listen to them, you won't even know they are watching a football game.

as i've said a zillion other times, i knew rick proehl (from the st. louis rams) from my high school days.

DUDE... how old are you??

whoa when was this announced?

I didn't really watch the game, but in the one snippet I caught collinsworth was talking up ted washington and how he's ALL THE BROWNS NEED for run defense. i thought that was funny in light of FWP's 9,000 yards or whatever. also lol @ K2's cheapshot.

And yes, the Browns still suck. How the hell did they beat the Chiefs last week?

Why the hell would the Browns draft a running back when they don't even have an offensive line? I don't care how good a running back you are. If you don't have a line, you're nothing (adieu, Edgerrin James).

http://www.carsonpalmer9.com/img/cornhole_classic.jpg

also: lol @ Al Michaels reading NFL teams the riot act for game-break pryo

You got to love the Saints.

On-side kick, WTF?!

Sean Payton, Coach of the Year.

that was maybe the awesomest game of the year. I am mystified by the dueling kneeldowns at the end end when just a little earlier they went for the onside while UP EIGHTEEN POINTS. But still, MIKE FUCKING KARNEY HOLY SHIT.

also wtf @ strahan subway commercial

that was maybe the awesomest game of the year. I am mystified by the dueling kneeldowns at the end end when just a little earlier they went for the onside while UP EIGHTEEN POINTS. But still, MIKE FUCKING KARNEY HOLY SHIT.

also wtf @ strahan subway commercial, not helping the gay rumors dude

Not that this will actually happen, but O! the storylinez.

I think the Saints kneeldowns with 3+ minutes to go were as much an "I'M IN UR STADIUM, CRUSHING UR WINDPIPE" as the onside kick was. It was like watching a cat bat a mouse around for 20 minutes before killing it.

the pats actually have a shot at losing the division to the jets. lol.

what is so ridiculous about this prediction? jeff garcia has looked pretty good these past few games -- and the rest of their offense is still strong and healthy!

prince halftime show is gonna be AWESOME. c'mon you have to be more stoked for this than the stones or mccartney. i wouldn't be shocked if we saw some nip too!

i'm amending this to 'head-explodingly awesome'. hester ftw!

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

re: Philly, they didn't exactly beat the Redskins in a convincing manner, and if you can't beat the Redskins convincingly and you expect to be a playoff team...well...haha I guess that makes you the Colts but seriously they are in third place (one out of the 'Boys and they lose the tie breaker with the Giants) and play both of those teams on the road the next two weeks. It's basically batshit insane to think they'll win all three of their next three games (hahaha they'll definitely beat the Falcons though).

re: Chicago, is there like a new rule this season that the Chicago defense can do WHATEVER THEY WANT all of the time?? I don't think I've actually watched a game of theirs (admittedly this is only a few games) where I thought anyone besides Hester looked totally awesome?? The pass interferences going on last night that weren't getting called made me mad enough I just sat off and read cookbooks instead of bothering with listening to fucking Kornhole shriek like a three year old girl with a My Little Pony over the fact that "THIS IS PRACTICALLY LIKE SOLDIER FIELD!!! ARE THE RAMS FANS DEAD OUT THERE? OMG WTF!! TEE HEE!" I'm kind of psyched for the inevitable complete Colts-style playoff collapse with this team because I'm with Denny Green at this point in the season.

That Cincy and Indy game this weekend should be fun to watch. The Bengals defense has played well in the past three weeks, but I think it will end up a video game score.

It's like, uh, the team that won is the better team LOL LOL go cry into ur porn collection ;_;

This is probably the last time I ever post on a thread about baseball (or whatever sport this is).

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/manlaws.jpg?t=1166119147

the top three make sense, but i really dont know how healthy hines and colston are.

you're the greatest, Ally.

* These might not actually be the words used but they were pretty similar. Derek Jeter is in one too where I believe they refer to him as a leader and philanthropist??! It's bizarre.

if by porn collection you mean shoebox full of superbowl rings then you're otm.

I like the image of him crying into his porn collection better; I imagine he doesn't even have the will to watch it, he's just, like, hugging the DVDs to him as he sobs.

http://www.boston.com/sports/football/patriots/articles/2006/12/15/brady_and_bridget_no_more_xs_and_os/

urr hurr

<3joey

MY GOD IT'S FULL OF STARS

i really like nfl street

http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/football/101437_hawk25.shtml

I might actually watch this.

GUYS the ad for next week's AMERICA'S GAME BEST SUPERBOWL TEAMS AS READ BY RANDOM CELEBRITIES totally RULES. It's for the '96 Packers and the clip they have for the promo is Brett Favre going, "Well, I guess, when you're takin' that many painkillers a day, I mean, that's how you know there's a problem." And that's it!!!

This is one of the greatest things television ever made. Also, midgets vs. elephant!

-- Allyzay is cool: with Blue n White, with Eli Manning, with NY Giants (garance8...) (webmail), December 16th, 2006 8:10 PM. (Allyzay Eisenschefter)"

HAHAHAHA YES!!!! When I saw this I died larfing. that Falcons/Cowboys playoff game you spoke of is like a microcosm for the misery of the franchise and is probz the team's most memorable failure. ps. EAT IT COWFAGS

Faulk isn't in the booth yet because he intends to play next year.

deangelo hall sucks so bad.

ps Dear NFLN:
Who the hell told you people that DEION "MR. IMPARTIAL NOT AT ALL CRAZY RANTS" SANDERS was an acceptable sub-in for Vermeil? I wish Faulk would rip his tongue out so he could get a word in edgewise.

i think there's been rumblings of Martz getting faulk to come to detroit. that'd be awesome.

xpost dude, I think pretty much all NFLN stuff was pulled from youtube :(

maine coons

http://peter.stillhq.com/jasmine/blog/ny-maine-coon3.jpg

http://www.wnbc.com/2006/1213/10524309.jpg

"i've got a new nickname - SKINNY!!!!!!!"

bears
saints
falcons
eagles
seahawks
49ers
giants

cowboys

the highly favored packers fall to the orange crush

He is saying this about a human being HE used to manage. I mean, imagine if your boss said this about you.

Drew Brees!

Argh wtf. :(

Yay for me!

http://www.informationleafblower.com/blog/archives/jeff%20garcia.jpg

revenge is suuuuWEEEEEEEEEEEET

Hall on Owens:

"The only thing he said to me after the game was that he heard I got beat up in a club. What is wrong with this guy? Man, I don't even hang out in clubs. But that's what this guy says to me after spitting in my face? Something is wrong with the guy and the league should do something about it."

OK the bolded part is the funniest thing that he could've possibly said.

How about not being such a bandwagon ho and actually posting when your team isn't the shit? And, god yes, fuck that Garcia pinky shit.

I AM TOM COUGHLIN
GONNA LOSE MY JOB AT SEASON'S END
(you have to sing this to the tune of "Iron Man" by Black Sabbath, FYI, preferably during that stupid ass truck commercial that plays "Iron Man")

As an added bonus they showed Garcia kissing the dude that intercepted that tipped ball at the end.

But you know this is CLASSIC, right?

exactly -- that's what i'd been saying all along (well, at least to folks off ILXor).

neither the eagles nor the giants will get very far if either makes the playoffs, though.

HOME SCHOOL

THANKS MOM :(

http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v482/ultravikingfan/?action=view¤t=t
j.flv

dude, I grew up in Buffalo. nobody knows this better than I do. it's just hard on the fans, man.

the bills @ 7-7 is totally blowing me away right now, even more than the titans or jets. i mean... WAHT.

you heard it here first: my Bills are going to be Super Bowl contendahs next season! it's possible I'm just drunk after watching MNF at a bar and will be really embarrassed about this declaration tomorrow, but I think Willis McGahee's got a couple more good years in him.

i sort of like TO again after finding out that he rides a volkswagon beetle with 20 inch dubs.

I do not know what to make of TO driving a Beetle. whaaaaat?

Well I mean of course, but no more than the Chargers' natural birthright to losingness.

seriously, i'm disappointed in gc. perhaps joel could do something about it.

Bad news: I'll be getting the Lions game.

Who should I start as my W/R: Morencey (Packers vs. Vikes) or the Griffith d00d (Falcolns vs. Panzers)?

At least it wasn't naked pics of Brian Billick.

Suggestions:

* Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
* Try different keywords.
* Try more general keywords.
* Buy a fucking clue.
* Try fewer keywords.

Would Brett Favre still play football if his entire team was electrical midgets, except for him?

ALLYZAY:

Ha! That's not even a question.

playoff picture is 100% madness. if your team got beat by the Browns you should be automatically disqualified (KC, NY, ATL)

The Browns are still in it because Kosar was offered Nancy Pelosi's job.

;_;

^^^ that line is a river FYI

“I don’t want to say my conference is bad, so I would call it parity.”

– Eagles safety Brian Dawkins, on the NFC playoff picture. (Philadelphia Inquirer)

“Again, that’s one of those things that I don’t have any control over — do you want replay, do you not want replay? Pass interefernce at the point, or a 15-yard penalty? I would say go talk to the genuises who make the rules, because they are the ones who make it and they have all the answers. … There are plenty of people on that committee and they love to talk about the rules they made and how great they are and all that. The Charley Casserly’s of the world, who have all the answers to everything. Talk to them.”

http://www.deadspin.com/sports/randymosscollectorsmask.jpg

http://www.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2006/10/chadjohnsomohawk.jpg

The only response from the retail clerk: "That's cool."

lawl

OCHO CINCO
MUCHO STINKO

...many lollolers followed in this household.

carolina basically ran the oklahoma wishbone all day. it was pretty lol actually, deangelo williams would take a direct snap on 3rd and 8 and run for the 1st and this happened at least 6 times. lawl. Weinkeball! we got Weinke'd :[ i wasnt even mad or disappointed or nothin cuz it was just so surreal to see. anyway I think it's clear now that no team in the NFC deserves to win anything, they should demote half the conference to the Big East or something.

yeah, seriously. every time I see the dudes on NFLN describe how about 237 7-8 teams are "still in it" my desire to even watch the playoffs dies a little more.

also, my mom could not give less of a shit about pro football or sports of any kind, but she was sitting by the TV while I was watching some of the Giants' postgame press conference and became totally mesmerized by Tiki Barber. she is in love.

No way, the Saints deserve Super Bowl rings. But I'm not going to hold my breath or anything.

So who wants a Coughlin or Mora dead pool?

^^^^^^ lol thanks ESPN pg 2

Yes, definitely start with the NFC crap factor, the Browns, Texans, Raiders and Bills are perfect examples of parity at work in 2006.

HOW does Matt Millen still have a job??!?!?

FOR REALS.

that's from peter king's column, i can't decide if he's being snarky or serious.

Or addendum if you lost to any of these teams you are dis-qualified from the playoff.

word -- coughlin is going to join ray handley and richie kotite in that special place where the biggest NYC head coach fuck-ups go after they get shitcanned.

oh yeah -- YAY IGGLES and YAY JETS. mangini for couch of the year?!? (still woulda been nice if laveranues could've, like, gotten a coupla points 'cause his not doing so eliminated me from my league's finals) ;__;

in that case, out of playoffs:

jets
green bay (probably out anyway)
atlanta
carolina
kc
indianapolis

Ken Dorsey will be starting Sunday against the Texans. New Years Eve, so much to answer for.

DISAZTAH WAITIN TA HAP'N.

Dude's I been repping for the Jets as secret East stealers but a 9-6 record with an OKAYISH team in a pretty middling conference/division is not exactly something to start the parades over, in other words, otto OTM. Also Daver, really, I mean that is true (though pretending Pennington sucks is a bit of a stretch).

i'm gonna feel this embolism in morning.

SAINTS:
1 Sun, Sep 10 at Cleveland W 19-14 -- FOX
2 Sun, Sep 17 at Green Bay W 34-27 -- FOX
3 Mon, Sep 25 Atlanta W 23-3 -- ESPN
4 Sun, Oct 1 at Carolina L 18-21 -- FOX
5 Sun, Oct 8 Tampa Bay W 24-21 -- FOX
6 Sun, Oct 15 Philadelphia W 27-24 -- FOX
7 -- bye -- -- --
8 Sun, Oct 29 Baltimore L 22-35 -- CBS
9 Sun, Nov 5 at Tampa Bay W 31-14 -- FOX
10 Sun, Nov 12 at Pittsburgh L 31-38 -- FOX
11 Sun, Nov 19 Cincinnati L 16-31 -- CBS
12 Sun, Nov 26 at Atlanta W 31-13 -- FOX
13 Sun, Dec 3 San Francisco W 34-10 -- FOX
14 Sun, Dec 10 at Dallas W 42-17 -- NBC
15 Sun, Dec 17 Washington L 10-16 -- FOX
16 Sun, Dec 24 at NY Giants W 30-7 -- FOX

Anyway, I'm rooting for the Jets because everybody else in the AFC makes me sick. The Titians are my backup team but their uniform makes me want to stick hot kittens into my eyes.

Well, Mickey Loomis is certainly the GM of the year if it isn't AJ Smith, but EVERYBODY thought the Saints would be at least a 7-9 team this year with the addition of Brees and a healthy Deuce + Bush. On the contrary, most people thought the Jets would be among the very worst teams in football.

1) you can't pick who you play (tho shitting the bed the previous year guarantees a cupcakey schedule)
2) who did the Saints beat (besides early season Philly, and the to-that-point rolling Cowboys)? - the only AFC team they won against was CLEVELAND (sorry lk), the Portisless Redskins took 'em @ home, Tampa Bay sucks, those Hotlanta wins are kinda tarnished, &c.

Meaning that I'm all for Sean Payton as COY (plz kick the crap out of the Bears) (sry otto), but SuperMangina In A Bottle had a lot less to work with than Payton did - give a hairless monkey like Haslett Brees & Bush & Colston & an actual home field, and he could probably win at least 9 games.

That, coupled w/ the fact that he started in the NFL as a BALL BOY at AGE TWENTY THREE, puts him over my top. Even if the Jets are a lock to get bounced in the 1st round. If they make the playoffs.