THIS IS THE THREAD WHERE WE CATALOG TERMS THAT TUOMAS (FAKE OR OTHERWISE) EXPRESSES EUROPEAN CONFUSION ABOUT.

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arby's is scary. how the hell are they still in business?

― children of mentalists (get bent), Thursday, 15 February 2007 18:33 (seventeen years ago) link

their food is tasty, despite almost every one of their stores being grody freak farms

― latebloomer's goddamn throat is on fire (clonefeed), Thursday, 15 February 2007 18:35 (seventeen years ago) link

that's not fair actually, i've been to a few clean ones

― latebloomer's goddamn throat is on fire (clonefeed), Thursday, 15 February 2007 18:38 (seventeen years ago) link

It's called "5 for $5.55".

― PPlains (PPlains), Thursday, 15 February 2007 18:38 (seventeen years ago) link

http://multinationalmonitor.org/mm2004/122004/logos/hardees.gif
http://www.worldfranchising.com/logos/1149190324.gif

― chaki (chaki), Thursday, 15 February 2007 18:40 (seventeen years ago) link

Hardee's is Carl's Jr's drunken split personality.

― nklshs (nklshs), Thursday, 15 February 2007 18:44 (seventeen years ago) link

if they had moonshine shakes i'd eat there

― latebloomer's goddamn throat is on fire (clonefeed), Thursday, 15 February 2007 18:45 (seventeen years ago) link

I've had moonshine shakes before. They came after I drank some moonshine.

― PPlains (PPlains), Thursday, 15 February 2007 18:47 (seventeen years ago) link

http://scoopsnoodle.com/lix/hardees.gif

― jhoshea (jhoshea), Thursday, 15 February 2007 19:11 (seventeen years ago) link

dear sir,

i have a 'photoshop crush' on you!

― Allyzay heard you got beat up in a club. (Allyzay Eisenschefter), Thursday, 15 February 2007 19:14 (seventeen years ago) link

*blushing* (new layer>brush tool>#fe034a>opacity 23%)

― jhoshea (jhoshea), Thursday, 15 February 2007 20:08 (seventeen years ago) link

Carl's Jr: Hardee's:: Famous Star: Thickburger

― iiiijjjj (iiiijjjj), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:13 (seventeen years ago) link

Thickburger?!?!?

― David RER (Frank Fiore), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:13 (seventeen years ago) link

You can't make this stuff up holmes.

― iiiijjjj (iiiijjjj), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:15 (seventeen years ago) link

1420 calories!!!!!

― David RER (Frank Fiore), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:17 (seventeen years ago) link

omg puke

― jhoshea (jhoshea), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:22 (seventeen years ago) link

puke or...want?

― Allyzay heard you got beat up in a club. (Allyzay Eisenschefter), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:24 (seventeen years ago) link

It's the buttered bun that puts it over the top.

― David RER (Frank Fiore), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:28 (seventeen years ago) link

I used to have a Thickburger (not that 2-patty monstrosity!) every week, but I'm down to six times a year or so.

― The PEW Research Center for Panty-Twisting (Rock Hardy), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:29 (seventeen years ago) link

i just ate a cheeseburger that was at most 1/4 the size of that thing and i am full.

(there were fries involved)

― jhoshea (jhoshea), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:31 (seventeen years ago) link

http://msnbcmedia1.msn.com/j/msnbc/Components/Photos/041116/041116_monsterTB.hmedium.jpg

― jhoshea (jhoshea), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:34 (seventeen years ago) link

ok yeah it's pretty gross

― Allyzay heard you got beat up in a club. (Allyzay Eisenschefter), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:37 (seventeen years ago) link

wow

that bacon is really fascinating.

― a mediocre black-and-white cookie in a cellophane wrapper (hanks1ockli), Thursday, 15 February 2007 21:37 (seventeen years ago) link

Back when I was still doing over the road tour crap, I used to live on monster burgers, mainly because in those days, Hardee's was the only fast food that was dumb enough to be open 24 hours in podunk midwestern towns.

After you eat one, you get chest pains. I shit you not.

― John Justen has already killfiled your sorry ass neener neener (John Justen), Friday, 16 February 2007 02:25 (seventeen years ago) link

Put some googly eyes on that burger pic, & it's a Jim Woodring drawing.

― David RER (Frank Fiore), Friday, 16 February 2007 02:44 (seventeen years ago) link

I am confounded by both that burger and Arby's hatred. If I could, I would eat all of my meals at Arby's and Taco Bell (then I would post pictures of my manboobs on www.manboobs.co.uk).

― Jesus Dan (dan perry), Friday, 16 February 2007 03:18 (seventeen years ago) link

And then you and lex could fall in love! It's like every romantic comedy ever.

― The Many Faces of Gordon Jump (Leon), Friday, 16 February 2007 03:25 (seventeen years ago) link

Taco Bell is probably the only place filthier than Arby's too! :D

― METAL ROBOTIC HEAD FACE (scarymonster), Friday, 16 February 2007 03:34 (seventeen years ago) link

All's I know about Hardees is apparently the Dead Milkmen think goths would scoff at someone who works there.

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 16 February 2007 03:43 (seventeen years ago) link

well would you?

― a mediocre black-and-white cookie in a cellophane wrapper (hanks1ockli), Friday, 16 February 2007 03:56 (seventeen years ago) link

x-post about filthy taco bells, but funny

― impermanent rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Friday, 16 February 2007 04:06 (seventeen years ago) link

I was okay with Arby's until I had a sandwich from them that was the worst dried-up corroded turd I've ever paid for. So foul.

― The PEW Research Center for Panty-Twisting (Rock Hardy), Friday, 16 February 2007 04:18 (seventeen years ago) link

Two months ago I was feeling kinda sleazy-hungry, so I went into the drive-thru for some 1:55 AM Taco Bell, gave the window dude a beer as a gesture of goodwill (it had been left in my car from a Ukranian post-doc I gave a ride home earlier in the evening) and he was kind enough and probably 19 years old enough to waive my bill and say to me "You're the pimp!!!"

― iiiijjjj (iiiijjjj), Friday, 16 February 2007 04:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Tuomas, do they have Taco Bells in Finland?

― iiiijjjj (iiiijjjj), Friday, 16 February 2007 05:00 (seventeen years ago) link

You drove OTR, John Justen?

If it wasn't for the wife, about-to-be-kid, cats, and dog, I'd so join the Diesel Driving Academy.

― PPlains (PPlains), Friday, 16 February 2007 05:02 (seventeen years ago) link

"You can imagine my culture shock when I moved from a working-class junior high to "one of the most prestigious" and "hardest to get into" high schools in the country.)"

It was like the Fresh Prince of Bel Air all over again.

― svend (svend), Friday, 16 February 2007 05:09 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, and i once gave a beer to a window cashier at the drive-thru. Guess what I got in return?

― PPlains (PPlains), Friday, 16 February 2007 05:10 (seventeen years ago) link

We don't even have Taco Bell in Australia! Let alone any of these other jointz.

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 16 February 2007 05:22 (seventeen years ago) link

We do have Taco Bill though, cuz we're lameass.

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 16 February 2007 05:22 (seventeen years ago) link

pp, is that true!!?!?!?!? (u foolin?!!?)

― jw (ex machina), Friday, 16 February 2007 05:32 (seventeen years ago) link

Tell me more about your aussie "Taco Bill".

― John Justen has already killfiled your sorry ass neener neener (John Justen), Friday, 16 February 2007 06:18 (seventeen years ago) link

there's a place in montreal called "taco bull"

― a mediocre black-and-white cookie in a cellophane wrapper (hanks1ockli), Friday, 16 February 2007 06:20 (seventeen years ago) link

We only have "taco ball", "taco boll", and "taco byll" left then.

― John Justen has already killfiled your sorry ass neener neener (John Justen), Friday, 16 February 2007 06:24 (seventeen years ago) link

Tuomas probably does know about "taco ball" though.

― John Justen has already killfiled your sorry ass neener neener (John Justen), Friday, 16 February 2007 06:24 (seventeen years ago) link

Arby's has normal fries in addition to curly. They suck.

best fries in America: Braum's. Even in the shittiest BFE Braum's, the crinkly fries are always cooked just right, not too much salt, not too much grease. Too bad nothing else is edible.

― milo (milo), Friday, 16 February 2007 06:32 (seventeen years ago) link

Crinkly fries = almost always sign of awesome restaurant fry potential.

― John Justen wheedly wheedly whee chugga chugga whee dunt dunt dunt (John Justen), Friday, 16 February 2007 06:38 (seventeen years ago) link

Taco Bill blows goats and then serves them as burritos.

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 16 February 2007 08:14 (seventeen years ago) link

There used to be a taco bell in London years ago, I don't thinkj there are any branches in the UK now, though.

― Norman Phay (Pashmina), Friday, 16 February 2007 10:15 (seventeen years ago) link

^the most boring post i have ever made on ilx, or probably anywhere else on the interweb.

― Norman Phay (Pashmina), Friday, 16 February 2007 10:16 (seventeen years ago) link

When Eminem tours the UK he has Taco Bell flown in especially. Now _that_ is a dull post.

― White Collar Boxer (DomPassantino), Friday, 16 February 2007 10:18 (seventeen years ago) link

Skipping 106 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

Ever been to a gay bar?

-- Tuomas (lixnix...) (webmail), February 20th, 2007 5:36 PM. (Tuomas) (later) (link)

― stevie (stevie2), Tuesday, 20 February 2007 18:49 (seventeen years ago) link

men like female crepes because they are all desperate and they don't mind where the next shag is coming from amirite

-- unfished business (papiermachealamphibia...), February 20th, 2007 5:47 PM. (Scourage) (later) (link)

No, that's a stereotype.

-- Tuomas (lixnix...), February 20th, 2007 5:47 PM. (Tuomas) (later) (link)

― METAL ROBOTIC HEAD FACE (scarymonster), Tuesday, 20 February 2007 18:51 (seventeen years ago) link

I've never learned to tie my shoelaces whilst standing up. I always have to sit down. For some reason some people find this funny.
-- Tuomas (lixnix...), February 20th, 2007 6:00 PM. (Tuomas) (later)

― jhoshea (jhoshea), Tuesday, 20 February 2007 23:29 (seventeen years ago) link

Numlock thread is Tuomas gold.

i am dying right now, this could be his pièce de résistance

― trainwrecked (sanskrit), Wednesday, 21 February 2007 00:39 (seventeen years ago) link

thought this was a Tuomas thread but it wasn't:-/ :

What if I slipped on a bar of soap in the shower?

― scary german latebloomer (clonefeed), Wednesday, 21 February 2007 22:06 (seventeen years ago) link

"Kegel muscles"?

Tuomas (Tuomas) on Friday, 25 February 2005 08:42 (1 year ago)

― Rick Gibralter (grady), Saturday, 24 February 2007 16:53 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, I don't think they're called that in Finnish... Was Kegel the one who discovered them?

Tuomas (Tuomas) on Friday, 25 February 2005 08:48 (1 year ago)
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I mean "discovered", like Columbus discovered America.

Tuomas (Tuomas) on Friday, 25 February 2005 08:48 (1 year ago)
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― Rick Gibralter (grady), Saturday, 24 February 2007 16:54 (seventeen years ago) link

Grady, thank you for that.

― Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 24 February 2007 16:58 (seventeen years ago) link

Heh. I just posted that over on nu-ilx. A+++++ would tuomas again.

― John Justen wheedly wheedly whee chugga chugga whee dunt dunt dunt (John Justen), Saturday, 24 February 2007 17:01 (seventeen years ago) link

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